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  2. I live in Florida - cousin marriages are legal here. there would be no no notation of "cousin marriage" on the certificate. If you want to make sure, call the Clerk of Court in any county and ask to make sure. You could do that in any state for verification. No need to pay an attorney fee. Good luck. HUGS Nat
  3. Perhaps wait for what others have to say, but I think you should find a lawyer who can answer both your questions. Perhaps a lawyer could answer your military question too. Good luck Ambra
  4. So many questions. But first let me give you an insite on our relationship. We are 1st cousins once removed, currently living in our home state of ohio, where marriage is prohibited. We have been together for 5 years now, and he is in the military. We have contemplated getting married in a state that allows marriage but were concerned with what the marriage certificate would say. Like is it stamped "cousin marriage " or ? Are their any red flags? Our family is aware of our relationship and have been very supportive however we do not want to risk his job.
  5. Yesterday
  6. you're married. that means your cousin is off limits. you need to find a way to reconnect with the man you vowed to share your life with, and that means you're going to have to walk away from the sexy cousin.
  7. Well...I work 40 plus hours in town and I along with my husband also farm 200 head of beef cattle, my husband just throws low blows constantly. We live in a little town where everyone knows us and our families, etc. that also includes my cousin. "Rugged" to me is a sexy thing. To me it means long hair, scruffy, tattoos, i don't really know other then that's how I would explain it. For the kids, the farm, divorce is not an option at the moment. Honestly my kids will be out of the house (hopefully) by the time I'm 40 so I initially wanted to hold out until then but the last 2 months have really thrown a wrench in that. Until i found this website, honestly, i thought i was a freak but clearly this is more "normal" then I could have imagined and that does put my heart at some ease. ***I live close to Arkansas so unfortunately have always heard the "cousin" jokes my whole life* I am not botheted by KC, I'm a very smarta**ed person myself and Nat, thank you, I may just take you up on that. Also, sorry for the double post. It wasn't loading (or that's what I thought anyways)
  8. Hey thanks for the advice guys. I'm actually very embarrassed so I haven't posted for awhile. I don't know what was going on with my mind when I typed those words. I've gotten busy since and it helped tremendously, but yea, that was a very low point in my life. But I've mostly moved past the shock and grief stage and now I'm in a much calmer state of mind. It's definitely difficult to cope since this isn't something you can share freely with other people who aren't in the same boat. Looking back I realize how stupid and weak I sounded, I wish there's an option to delete posts haha.
  9. You are in the same boat I am in.
  10. Last week
  11. Graypmn

    Big crush

    Hello There, never thought I would used this but it's worth a try. I have a big crush on my older cousin, I am 21 year's old and Idk how old she is. She's looking to become a nurse she's in college. We've always had a deep connection together and I would always check up on her very sweet girl. We live in the state but different cities we only get to see each other in funerals and special events so every 4 year's we stay connected and I told her she was my favorite cousin and she told me she love me but I doubt she love me more than family but in my eye's I think she is the greatest girl ever. She don't be going on dates and don't be sluting around she have way more class than that and idk what to do. I would love to be with her but with my luck if I confess she probably won't talk to me no more.
  12. I'm getting ready to smack KC up side the head! Of all the idiotic comments! I've been through sometime similar and got a divorce. which, I think, saved my life. I found a book that is very helpful in dealing with difficult people in a positive manner. It is Nasty People, How to Stop Being Hurt by them without stooping to their level/ You can get it from Amazon. I do agree with Hawk that you should sort out your marriage before continuing with your cousin. Pay no attention to KC's humor - I'll be sorting him out. LOL Send me a message if you want to know more. I'm on your side!!! HUGS Nat
  13. Why do you only work 30 hours a week? Are you crippled or something? If you don't like the fact that your husband keeps pointing out that you're lazy then I would just tell him so. I I would try to make my husband happy. Get a second job. He probably knows you are running around like a little busy bee. Yeah too much time on your hands. Well obviously he is right. You have enough time to chase after your rugged cousin. What does rugged mean anyway? I like to think of myself as rugged. Sometimes I skip a day without shaving. Go do some work please. Something constructive.
  14. FreeSpirit, Since this was double posted, I deleted the copy. Now, as to advice. You will find this community to be very supportive of cousin relationships, UNLESS one or both are married/in other relationships. Our advice is going to be to stop the shenanigans with the cousin, do everything you can to salvage your marriage, and should that NOT be possible, divorce BEFORE continuing to carry on with your cousin. Kinda the TL/DR version of our standard donation to this sort of party, so don't be surprised if this is elaborated on by others.....
  15. Here I sit, at work none the less and allllllllll I can do is think about my amazing, funny, handsome, rugged, adventures...cousin. I have been married for over a decade, in my early 30's with kids and I have been having an affair with my cousin for a couple of months. My husband constantly has me on an emotional rollercoaster. He comes out of nowhere gripping at me, tells me Im lazy, I never do enough, etc. I work 40 plus hrs a week, volunteer, very involved in our community, etc. Since this affair began I have been so much happier, my cousin too! I have reallt been considering leaving my husband but am so afraid of the consiquences. Help!
  16. i think denver is pretty also. but i've only driven through!
  17. Guest

    In love with my cousin

    I am 17 years old male and my cousin is 26. I always was attracted to her but it wasn’t until a little more then a year ago, that I started really having feelings for her. We text a lot but it’s never flirty but i do find that she is usually always the one to start the conversation. We have a lot in common and whenever I’m with her in person, I feel a strong vibe and I can tell that she follows me. If I go inside she goes inside and if I go outside, she goes outside. We always make strong eye contact and it’s just ways I feel when I’m looking at her that are unique to her. She acts different when we’re around other people and when we’re texting it’s like she’s a different person. I really want to tell her in someway how I feel but I’m afraid that she doesn’t feel the same way. Perhaps I see only what i want to see. When I’m honest to myself I remember how she’ll be talking about other guys to my other cousins when I’m around her. Just the way she looks at me and try’s to talk to me tells me different. I don’t know if any of this makes sense. I just don’t know what to do. A little context: like i said I’m 17 in high school but really mature for my age. She’s 26 going to college and she isn’t a very social person, she has her small circle of girlfriends and that’s it. She’s very close to her family and still lives with her parents. Whenever I go to hangout with my guy cousins, she’s there. She definetly treats me different as opposed to my other cousins. I’m not the best at telling things, but I just want to know if anyone can help me with my life. I suppose I’m a little depressed too
  18. KC

    What Is the Deal?

    i have sent you a free emails. Did you not get them? send your current email in the contact form. or you phone# if you like
  19. Guest

    What Is the Deal?

    I’ve been banned from CC. Somebody please tell me what’s going on. Natanna banned me for being abusive and a troll?? I admit this has hit a sore spot with me. Obviously I don’t want this to be posted. I’m on the site as a guest through my phone.
  20. KC

    Chat Room

    Forum developers dropped that feature. I may install a third party chat mod someday.
  21. There are a number of us who are active - it's just been a bit quiet which happens sometimes. Welcome. I lived in Denver once and really loved it out there. I live in Florida now. HUGS Nat
  22. Yoshi

    Chat Room

    What happened to this feature?
  23. Hello is anyone active here anymore?
  24. l don't feel like he is anymore guilty than you are. l strongly disagree with some of the other users above. Yes, it is wrong that he has a girlfriend. But, you knew it before hand. And obviously so did he. I don't think that you should see it as a fact that he is using you. Now, l am not saying this is right or wrong. But be very careful of how you decide to handle this. There is tons of opinions on the internet. But truly, you will only be able to get the right answers from someone that's in the same situation as you are.
  25. No, don't do that man. It must be hard to deal with broken heart but time heals all wounds. I can't tell you how to forget about her because I am in similar boat, but I can tell you how you can get over a heartbreak. Find something to get your mind off her. Read books, find a hobby, join a club, make a journal on computer and write down your thoughts daily, meditate. Talk to real-life friends you trust. Life is way too precious to give up on. Never give up, my friend, no matter how hopeless it may seem at times. You have so much to live for! Don't let one situation bring you to your knees. If she doesn't love you, so what? You have to love yourself more than anything and you have a long life ahead of you! Don't allow her to dictate how you live or who you are. Allow time to smooth things out.
  26. Honestly I don't know what I want. I am conflicted. All I know for sure is I have feelings for her. I can't make sense of it beyond that. She is a wonderful person, always smiling and someone who listens and loves to talk with me but only when we are alone together. I ask her a lot of questions about her and she talks a lot. She is gentle, kind and real pretty. I have always felt something for her since childhood. As badly as I want her, you are probably right that my best recourse is no recourse at all. I should just leave it alone, regardless of how difficult or tempting it may be. I want her to be happy and the best way for that is to let her be, even if it is hard. I don't think she likes me in that way if I am being completely honest. Reason is she never initiates texts. It was always me initiating all our texts.. She always responded almost instantly and always friendly though (with overuse of smilies heh), but if she liked me in that way, wouldn't she initiate texts at least occasionally? Then again she always initiates our face to face conversations so I don't know anymore. I don't have much to go on as I mentioned. I can't use physical cues to gauge it either because we have not been physical since those couple childhood instances so no hugs, not even handshakes. Neither of us ever touch each other while talking, period. I want to be physical with her occasionally, like brush hands while talking or hug occasionally but it's not in either of our natures because we are both introverted. I don't want to come across as pervy or make her uncomfortable so I would never initiate a hug. What am I worried about? First and foremost, she is my cousin! It's not normal to feel that way, especially if someone else found out. (hope I don't make others here feel bad but to me it seems bit odd to feel that way about a first cousin). Second, she and I are finally getting close for the first time and I am afraid if she found out then she would be disgusted or mad and never talk with me again. We went so long without speaking to each other and I don't want to scare her off now. Finally, I feel like she is someone who I can open up to about almost anything. She is a good person and someone who will listen and be willing to talk about anything. I never had anyone like that in my life so far so I don't want to lose that. Her being similar age and knowing me so long makes it different and special. I have not shared personal things and personal issues with with her yet and neither has she with me, maybe someday. I want both of us to be open but one thing I don't think I can ever tell her about is my major crush on her due to reasons above. I was thinking deep about how to deal with it. We don't really know each other well yet and she feels mysterious to me so maybe I am intoxicated with the idea of her rather than the actual her. Maybe if I had long text conversations with her at night when we are both relaxed, alone and not influenced by social constraints from in-person talks, I can find out more about her and erase the mystery aspect. It might take me to know her before I can finally move on so basically let the crush develop however it may without explicitly telling her. I don't know if it is a good idea though because it can backfire if we get too close. The other options are 2) avoid/ignore her to slowly drift apart even though ignoring someone is not in my nature (I felt bit sad all those years we avoided each other), 3) be rude to her and forcefully create instant distance between us permanently to save the trouble down the road even though it might leave me heartbroken for a while, or 4) continue as it may but try very hard to hide my feelings from her & no eye contact & no smiling at her so she never finds out, basically limit my communication/signs with her without being rude or cold. I don't know how good she is at reading people so it might already be too late for option 4, but I can still try hard to keep myself closed off from her. As I said, it would be hard but doable. I had time to think about this since my last post. I find this situation awkward but also bit interesting from a scientific perspective. I am surprised this sort of cousin attraction doesn't happen more often than it does. It is extremely extremely rare for us to be attracted to direct family but cousin is not technically direct family. We are around our cousins more than anyone not direct family. Perhaps 99% of the girls we meet and date in life don't last at all or last couple years max. A cousin will be around with us more than those 99% of girls from childhood to old age, we share a lot of personal thoughts with and be there for one another through good times and bad times, laugh with them, go together with on events/movies/family vacations and eat with often. I would think cousin crushes would happen a lot more.
  27. There is no elevated risk of birth defect with a third cousin pairing, or second for that matter, and only a slightly elevated risk from a first cousin marriage. FWIIW
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