Jump to content
  • Announcements

    • KC

      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

      Be informed on better ways to stay safe on the web -- Source: Mozilla

KC

Administrator
  • Content count

    653
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    22

KC last won the day on November 5

KC had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

56 Excellent

About KC

  • Rank
    "The Boss"

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    North Carolina
  1. Aunt

    Sober up and put your head in the toilet. Run around the house nakkid with your hair still wet 10 times. Call home and tell your momma that is going on in your mind.
  2. Help please. Anxiety through the roof

    Hi RRj, I can relate to everything you are saying. Everything will be OK, you are just going through a phase. I'm sorry that you are questioning your relationship because of your distant kinship. There is no need for it. It will go away. You are being silly. Hang in there. I married my 1st cousin. We just spent two years apart after 20 years of marriage. Wow that was tough, but I found out that I could be happy being single...after the first year. My mind was scrambled for the first year, like a TV on channel 3. We are back together again now. We have made fresh commitments to each other and hope to start another 20 year chapter. You have no idea how much hurt we are working through. But we are committed to fulfill the vows we made before God and will give it another go. Nobody said it would be easy, right? Things are not great yet. I am in a new city trying to find us a better place to live. I just had my first job interview today. Hmmm. I will say one thing that is amazing. Hey, I was indeed happy being alone but after being back with my wife for two months, I feel like I have my zen back. I can't explain it but it is a sweet feeling of peace that makes me smile for no reason. And when I do, the heavens open up and I can hear the angels singing. I didn't have that when I was alone. As LadyC pointed out, marriages take a commitment to each other and to God. You can't make it alone. Look at the stats. I am a Christian and only went back to my wife because I felt led to. It's as inexplicable as the peace I am feeling -- the Zen! Zen isn't a Christian term I know... but maybe we should adopt it. This Christian has Zen! I'm praying for you and wish you the best. You guys are so distantly related that it is silly to worry about it. Do not let it play in your mind like a broken record. Play some Rolling Stones I'm not proofreading or correcting anything......
  3. At the bar

    On my wife's birthday, we went to a nice restaurant. I'm officially a non drinker, but this was her birthday so we were both drinking a little bit. Two women and a guy was sitting beside of us at the bar. I was challenging them to a game of pool. I was talking $ hit to them all in good fun. My wife told the women that they looked alike and asked if were they sisters. They replied "No we are friends." Then they decided "hey you two look alike -- are you brother and sister?" My wife replied, "No! We are husband and wife!" Then I retorted, "She is my cousin!" We all laughed like crazy.
  4. https://www.cousincouples.com/?page=states Is the only page we maintain. Wikipedia is not an academic source and should only be used as a reality check.
  5. been a while....

    Hi Jessie my friend. It's good to see you drop in. You are one of us and I wish you the best. 21 years is a long time and I can't imagine the pain of such a loss. I will keep you in prayer.
  6. Around the world

    Anywhere in the Middle East, they typically PREFER a cousin vs. a "stranger." Europe has no prohibitions against cousin marriages. Many US states allow cousin marriages.
  7. Introduction and Advice

    At what age do they typically marry in Columbia? In the States, we think 18 is a magic number but that is not the case everywhere. The reality is if you do not express your feelings within (?what the next year?) she may be snatched up by some fast-talking Columbian who is on the cartel's payroll. So my friend, you really are in a situation. Your options appear to be: 1) Let her go 2) Have a longer than normal courtship, which is a wise thing to do (and you need to get the ball rolling) I nearly always advise people to wait until you are both mature and settled-in somewhere after college. That is the ideal, but this not going to work for you. I am not advocating anything here, but I live in the South (and no I will not apologize; I love the south :D) folks used to marry very early. I have an aunt who married at 14 (or was it 13?) and she seemed to have the greatest marriage of all. 40 years later, if you saw them, they were always holding hands, hugging or whatever ... very much still in love still. I do not advocate marriages of this nature, I am just musing about young marriages in my own family. If I were you, I would not put all of my eggs into one basket. There is no such thing as "the one" for you. No soul mates. In reality, you have billions of wild women to choose from. So be more honest with your cousin and the other women you will find attractive.
  8. Introduction and Advice

    (If you have never seen The Big Lebowski you may not get my little jokes) My cousin is nearly 5 years younger than I; it's not a biggee. You mentioned torture! Bro, you are torchering yourself by keeping this all bottled up. You have to be brave and bite the bullet, like all of us. I do love the women who are so sure of themselves that they peruse their "prey" and fearlessly express their feelings. They are hard to come by because they get "snapped up" pretty quicky. Most women, unfortunately are not this way. As the Big Lebowski, uh, The Dude would advise, drink one White Russian and call that girl up, man. Or KC might say, grow a pair! What are you waiting for? Is she not worth a little disapproval from people you do not care for anyway? Who cares what "the family" thinks? They are not marrying her, you are. Wow you little nihilistic cousin lover, you hold to every excuse in the book! What a wimp! You wouldn't last in 'Nam for five seconds. Don't get Walter upset with this nonsense. It's best to take a page out of those fearless womens' book and spill everything to your cousin; otherwise, you are just pissing on the rug, man -- the one that ties it all together.
  9. Brand new, stopping in to say hi!

    The study of man and psychology too! Two of my favorite subjects. I have a degree in religion and will have another one if I keep it together long enough. So, that is where I am coming from. I jolted you on purpose but I see you are dead-set on trying out this new experiment. You have to ask yourself some difficult questions. I would ask, "What will you tell your friends" but I am afraid you may have none. I'm sure your family will flip out. The first person who knows your plans will tell everybody; you will not have to tell a soul. It will be one hell of a day when the dam breaks. Are you sure you want to give up everything to do this? I'm afraid that is what it will come down to. You sound like a nice catch to me -- a prize. Hmmmm. To put it differently, you are worth more than this. It's just a dumb idea and you demand support that I can't offer you. Hopefully someone else will jump in and tell you something brilliant.
  10. Shocked by friends reaction

    I married a first cousin, so people's reactions were worse than what you experienced. I can understand how the experience has caused you to rethink your relationship of 15 years. I can assure you that it will go away. Most people in history married a 1st or 2nd cousin, so you are not exactly alone in your decision to marry a cousin! It seems to me that 2nd cousins are so distant that one can't even ridicule you Lighten up. Sometimes, you just have to allow others revel in their abject ignorance. You can't take it to heart. One relative , before we married, stated that I should be "found in a ditch somewhere." I've heard the same jokes and the seen the same reaction from Neanderthals. My cuz and I went through hell. We were young and the drama was at a fever pitch. All of this just made us stronger. I'm sure that will be the case with you guys as well.
  11. Brand new, stopping in to say hi!

    Sometimes the best advice that you will ever get will initially sound harsh and judgemental. My intention was just to give it to you straight, like I do everyone else.
  12. 33 years and still counting

    That is very nice. Thanks for sharing.
  13. Brand new, stopping in to say hi!

    If you want to find individuals with like-minded ideas, I hate to break it to you but Woodstock is over my dear. I think your plan is wayyy too far out, even for them. If you want to ruin your life and your reputation, well-sir-re-bob!! Who am I to judge? Some free advice: if you do not want answers to your questions, do not ask the question. If your cousin had an ounce of respect for you or himself, he would divorce his wife and peruse you. Now what does that tell you? Oh, it's not my job to pat you on the back and tell you all of your plans sound great! They are not! Wake up and smell the coffee. I could not dream up a plan any worse. I want to pinch myself to see if this message will just go away!
  14. Brand new, stopping in to say hi!

    Wow Allison, it is not often that I am speechless, but this comes close. If this is part of some religious thinking on your cousin's part, just run like hell. You do not need to join a religious cult. Five years from now, he may have 10 wives. So, how many more will he want? If he is part of the runaway Mormon sector, just run. If he won't share a large White Russian with you, just so no! I'm not sure what conventionally religious means. If you marry this man, you will not be conventionally anything. If you don't need friends or family in your life, I guess this is the way to go. I hate to be negative, but this is how it will be Allison. Is this really what you want?
×