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Posts posted by KC

  1. I think LadyC is correct, although she and I both know that sometimes marriages come to an end. If that is the case, now is a very good time to break the news to your husband. You should do this before you are any more wrapped up in your cousin. You really put us in a bad spot when asking "should I leave my husband for my cousin." The short answer is no, of course. 

    My wife and I have been on and off for years. Two years ago, I decided to try again with her -- not because it was easy but because it was hard. There was a whole lot of crap to get past and to process. The experiment didn't work out but I am glad that I gave it one last shot. Is that an option for you? I suggest that you give it another try with your husband, maybe go on a cruise. In my opinion, you should keep the affair to yourself and take it to your grave. Look, if it doesn't work out, then do it right. Leave your husband before you start back with your cousin.

    Second marriages statistically are more likely to fail than first marriages. If you keep carrying on with your cousin, you may very well end up with nothing but a lot of heartbreak. I would hate to see that.

    Affairs are a great way to burn bridges. You are sabotaging your marriage. Are you sure you want to go down this road?

  2. Why do you only work 30 hours a week? Are you crippled or something? If you don't like the fact that your husband keeps pointing out that you're lazy then I would just tell him so.

     I I would try to make my husband happy. Get a second job. He probably knows you are running around like a little busy bee. Yeah too much time on your hands. Well obviously he is right. You have enough time to chase after your rugged cousin. What does rugged mean anyway? I like to think of myself as rugged. Sometimes I skip a day without shaving.

    Go do some work please. Something constructive.

    • Like 1

  3. Quentin, my friend, my friend... oh man do I feel your pain and understand some of what you have experienced.

    LadyC is right, I'm afraid. Some people do not have empathy. They will put you through a spiritual wood chipper. I have had a 20 yr marriage for real. Of course, there were great times, especially in the beginning. Oh boy, how fast it can go downhill!

    If I know anything, I know people or at least a thing or two:


    She suffered from Depression, PTSD, Addiction, and she was a thief and a pathological liar.

    All of these go together, like ingredients for an apple pie. Just remember you can't fix yourself, and you sure as heck can't fix her.

    Sometimes you have to totally forget about what people tell you and go by how they treat you instead. You have made the right decision. Trust me. Time does heal. Tonight my biggest frustration is that I realized that I have not saved enough money to see my favorite band who are plying in Maimi next week. Darnit! Darnit! It makes me bat $hit crazy! Who cares that I saw him two years ago?

    Seriously, you will get over this. It takes time. If you live near Miami, we should pool our money for a room and catch a great band.  Maybe some wild women, too, that will make us throw rocks at cousins.

  4. But isn't that always the case? At some point you have to open yourself up and be vulnerable. How about the old "If you were not my cousin"... trick?  It gives you an out, in case your cousin is so offended that he requires therapy for the next 25 years. And your family thinks you're some wacko perv and starts referring to you as "crazy Sally" LOL LOL well I hope Sally is not your real name

  5. Well Elle le, lots of people say that their cousin crush was the most intense relationship they ever had. It certainly doesn't mean that your current boyfriend is not the one for you. He could be. Sometimes we want what we can't have and right now it is not feasible to date your cousin.

    Forget about your cousin. If he wants you, he will come after you. He is acting like a silly little kid -- so let him be. You have a life to live.

    But the question is, " is it normal to still miss your cousin 2 years after breaking up? " There is no time limit for grief or a break-up. However, two years seem to be streatching it -- hense the "sometimes we want what we can't have." I don't have all of the answers here but I am with Serendipity. Do whatever it takes to get you over your cousin, who does not seem to care for you.




  6. 2 hours ago, ragingdesire61 said:

    LOL, well, I can't comment on nasty breakups between cousins, as my sweetie and myself are just embarking on our journey. I do know about nasty breakups though. After a tortuous 8 year marriage to a paranoid and suspicious woman who thought I was, literally, screwing everything in skirts, we finally separated. Then she had the NERVE to kick the bucket suddenly and unexpectedly 3 days after I moved out ?

    WOW! So she OD's? What happened to her?

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