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luvher4ever

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About luvher4ever

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  1. I congratulate you, Pepe, and your cousin. It's so great to hear of a story with a happy ending. May you have many years of bliss together! I can't agree with people who say "take every opportunity to be happy," because that sounds too much like unrestrained hedonism. But I do say, "seize the opportunity." It may only come once. I chickened out, bypassed the opportunity, and have spent a lifetime regretting it. Glad you had better sense than I did!!
  2. Congratulations on your upcoming engagement/marriage, and on a happy outcome. :grin: Just curious: why "nerdy"? You don't sound like a nerd, and nothing you've told us about him sounds nerdy, either.
  3. Bearbait, I've been away from this board for several months and just now found your shocking news. I am so sorry to learn of your loss. It's only been a couple of months now and I know you're still reeling from this, and my heart breaks for you. It is so wonderful that you "talked" with him on the day of his death. You have the satisfaction of knowing that your love was mutual, and can take added comfort that you did nothing dishonorable or sinful but honored your commitments. May God give you comfort and peace.
  4. Hawk, I really appreciate your advice. It's sound and sensible. Like you and the others on this thread, my cousin and I backed away from it all when we were in college, and I've never ceased to regret/mourn that. But we've both been married to other people for many years, and I guess it just took me longer than most folks to recognize that my cousin and I are getting old and nothing magical will ever happen again. But I've finally accepted that. I think we've reestablished a good friendship. We have gotten together with our spouses as "chaperons," and when it's my wife there, things go pretty well (but nothing deep). When her husband is around, though, it's really bad. He's very loud, self-centered, and obnoxious; "An ego as big as all outdoors." I always feel like he's condescending to me; and the two of them constantly argue and talk over each other. In short, I've never liked him and the years have not improved him; and at least when we're all four together, he seems to bring out the worst in her. (BTW, my wife and my cousin are good friends, and my wife agrees with my assessment of "The Ego.") I also am constantly afraid that my eyes will betray me when I'm around my cousin: will the longing and pain still show? My life is summarized in a six-word autobiography that somebody posted on CC somewhere: "Found true love. Married someone else."
  5. Two absolutely wonderful novels are by Syrell Rogovin Leahy: Family Truths and Family Ties. (It's the same family, same cousin-love in both books.) A lifetime of loving and longing. Both are out of print but available used through Amazon. After reading some of the posts above, I got Meet Me Under the Ombu Tree and just finished reading it. I think it's fantastic! :smiley: And I've just started Jude the Obscure. So many of the other suggestions are out of print and there don't seem to be any used copies floating around.
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