I'm sorry to hear that it didn't work out the way you wanted. I too know what you're going through and how you feel. Something similar happened to me with my cousin except my story is a little more complicated... it was more of a crazy love triangle because he had a gf at the time we were talking (flirting) but I never found out till 7 months after I met him when I got a message from her. In the end he ended up going back to her even though I did everything to show him that I truly loved him and would give my life for him but I guess that wasn't enough. Btw they were broken up at the time that I actually gave him a try. But like you I had my moments of being in heaven and now my dark days of being without him and my heartache of losing him to another girl. I think that's the worst feeling because you wonder what she has that you don't. Anyways enough about my sob story. I just want to let you know that I am here for you if you ever need someone to talk to because I know how bad it hurts to lose the love of your life, your first love (my cousin was also my first love)
I agree with 122107. . we need to let go in order for us to move on with our lives and we definitely need to focus on ourselves right now. We need to get a good education so we can get a good paying job. I'm sure we'll find another guy that would want to spend the rest of their lives with us and then our cousins will just be a memory. Of course we will always love our cousins because after all they were our first loves. Hopefully when we see our cousins again in the future and they see how great our lives turned out, they will miss us and regret letting us go. Sorry if you don't feel that way.. I do because at the moment I am mad and hurt with my cousin for lying to me and choosing another girl over me.