Jump to content
<?php echo esc_attr( get_bloginfo( 'name' ) ); ?>

gryan

Advanced Member
  • Content Count

    39
  • Joined

  • Last visited

    Never

Community Reputation

0 Neutral

About gryan

  • Rank
    Member

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Not Telling

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. This is an amazing story...I envy you. You are a very lucky person. GO FOR IT, DON'T THINK TWICE ABOUT IT
  2. Eh, are you guys reading the parts where she makes it pretty clear that her cousin is showing some signs of possibly being attracted to her, despite being married? I would suggest approaching him in person and maybe asking what's up with some of his behavior...if you are afraid that perhaps you might be misunderstanding his behavior, then you should just not say you have romantic feelings for him unless he admits that the reason he was acting the way he was acting was because he has romantic feelings for you. Right now it just seems like he is showing all these signs, but you haven't really attempted to find out what they meant.
  3. Sorry but I really can't respect anyone who has the mentality of their reputation by the community mattering more than her life (or the life of her kids, etc). You love your cousin for what seems to be legitimate reasons. If my mother as the way you described, I would not listen to anything she has to say and would have let her go a long time ago.
  4. What exactly is HIS situation like? Did he finish school? Does he have a job? Does he live on his own? Is he willing to help provide for you where your parents would not? You may be able to make this work and still go to college...it's hard to put these kinds of feelings on hold because they will torment you for years, especially if you feel he is the one.
  5. Many of these links don't actually work, such as the success stories. Can someone fix them please, I'm interested to read them. Otherwise, great advice. I had a lot of this stuff already in my mind but it was nice to get some reassurance by reading this thread.
  6. Sure, but I think for now you should at least call and let her know you miss her and ask about her schedule. A full confession now probably isn't a good idea. Yeah it always helps to at least be close to her parents. I'm very close to my cousin's parents...you might even say I'm closer to her mom than I am with my mom. I don't really care at all what my mom thinks, the issue is more what her parents think. They need to understand your character - especially that you are honest and sincere, so that when you make your confession some day, they can really trust what you have to say. Well there's rejections for many reasons...I will not give up. I'm going to make it very clear how much I care and how much I'm willing to sacrifice (practically everything) to make it work. You also got to reassure her that regardless of what happens, your current friendship will never disappear. And also, don't rush the decision, give her a lot of time to think but also plead with her to listen to everything you have to say so she can know EXACTLY how you feel and that there are no misunderstandings. Honestly, one of the worst things I envisioned was me trying to explain and she constantly interrupting me with "no" and "stop" and just not letting me speak...it's a terrible feeling and I hope that doesn't happen.
  7. I'm also very happy to hear this story...but just wondering, what happened with the parents? The parents were something you feared, I guess you guys just ignored them entirely? One word of advice...don't let anything ruin this, if she is truly the person that you feel most complete with. Make as many sacrifices as you need to make, don't let little petty issues ruin your relationship. Also your message was posted Aug 5th, just wondering what the update is on this...I'm curious to know.
  8. I will be devastated as well...but I don't think I will ever abandon her and even if she finds someone, I will still confess someday. Usually you would tell the parents after you have confessed to her. I'd first worry about that and then the parents. I don't have any advice for the parents though, because I'm pretty worried about that regarding my situation as well... Well we aren't that close together in the sense of location, because we live in different countries...this makes it much harder, even though we are pretty close, friend-wise. If I lived in the same area, I would be spending a lot more time and I would have probably confessed by now. Also when I do confess everything, it definitely won't be in an e-mail, on the phone or skype, it will be in person...probably on my next visit.
  9. Honestly what I think is... Yeah she is in a relationship but I don't think because of this, you shouldn't tell her how you feel. Continuously hitting on her while she is in a relationship is probably not the way to go, but I don't think her being in a relationship should hold back your confession. Just throw it out there...you should still tell her that you respect that she is in a relationship, but I'd also tell her you just can't continue to hide your feelings. And of course, let her know that regardless of what she thinks/decides, your friendship (non-romantically) will never disappear and you'll always be there for her.
  10. Well I didn't say you had to express all of your feelings. Missing her doesn't mean that you're in love with her (romantically). Trust me, I was afraid of annoying her too! That's why when I first called her, I asked her to tell me what her schedule is like. She had said if she was too busy, she wouldn't be able to pick up but otherwise she would. By "keep calling", I don't mean call multiple times a day, or even everyday. But like, say a week or two has passed and I want to call and she doesn't pick up, I'd maybe calling the next day or day after. It's best to ask her what her schedule is though for the best time. And no my cousin doesn't know what I truly feel but I made it very clear that I missed her a lot and wanted to keep in touch. She was pretty understanding about that and there wasn't any awkwardness. That said, it can vary between different people, how they react to it. I don't think it is wrong to miss someone's presence so I honestly don't think someone should freak out about that. You don't really need to confess anything else at this time, especially if you are in a rushed phone conversation.
  11. Well to be honest, I actually can't understand how someone can be so busy studying that they can't text or reply to an e-mail... Also have you made it clear how much you miss her and want to be in touch? She might make more time for you if she realizes your pain... I'm not really sure about sending letters...takes way too long for them to receive it (if it's going overseas) and then the response back (if any) will take just as long. It's a nerve wracking experience most likely, to check your mailbox everyday for a reply that could take months. If she supposedly has no time to text you, why do you think she will have time to respond to a letter and then mail it? I suppose it works well for memories though, as Nattana said. In any case, I was in a similar situation...my cousin was (and still is) working an insanely demanding job to the point where she can almost never freely answer her phone. You want to make it clear that you hope she isn't busy and you don't want to disturb her, but you really miss her and appreciate talking to her. I pretty much try a few times a week or so (until she is free to pick up) and then talk, it works out. I wouldn't just text though, I'd call...also ask her what her class and study schedules are and what the best time would be to call her.
  12. I would have to say, DO NOT AVOID HER. Your friendship should not change with this, always keep in touch... Also I'm not so sure it's hopeless just because you're both married. The question is, are you happier with your cousin or your spouse? This is probably something both have to discuss some more. Don't avoid her...
  13. Well, why exactly don't you communicate when she is studying abroad? I'm in a similar situation and I tried to keep in contact as much as possible. Call or text her overseas even if it will cost you. In my case I don't care if it even costs me $10 per text or minute of calling, I would still call. Got to be pro-active, not passive, at times like this I believe. And yes, the feeling of "she might find someone" when she is away is dreadful...but the chance of it happening is even moreso if there is no contact and she starts forgetting about your existence. Always stay in contact!
×
×
  • Create New...