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About xoxot

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  1. Hi :-) I am a 19 year old girl that is head over heels in love with her first cousin, who is 26. Our story is a very complicated one, that has been full of tons of hardships. When I was only 16 (I know this sounds wrong, maybe it is) I added my cousin on Facebook, let's just call him S. S is the son of my mom's brother, but we haven't been in contact much. We were around each other while we were young up until probably until I was in 3rd or 4th grade, and then no contact from then on until I was 16. ANYWAY, I added him on Facebook and we started talking normally, then it turned into compliments, flirting, and it actually turned into a full relationship after a few months. He was 23 at the time, so besides him being my cousin, he was also way too old for anyone's approval. I begged and begged him to come and pick me up, and he finally agreed. I would sneak out of my house and have my friend wait at my house ready to call if anything happened. We would drive up into an old field and just talk and hold hands and kiss and cuddle and it was amazing. A few weeks into this, my mom found out. This almost tore our family apart, I didn't imagine that they would react in the way they did. Our parents argued on the phone, and my dad threatened to call the police. I was grounded for 6 months or so. As you can probably guess we didn't talk again until now. I still live at home, but plan on going to college next year (hopefully). We started talking a few months and it's like we never stopped. I can tell him anything, I just connect with him, he's amazing. He's something I've always been looking for but didn't know what it was until I found it. As I do live with my parents still, and because of our situation and past, we still have to sneak around. I just feel so safe, and so happy when I'm around him. We've talked about how this is a bad situation, but I think he's willing to try and make it work. He is definitely worth the risk, he makes every doubt I get fade away. There's something about S that I just can't stop wanting, I just feel so many things about him. I love him. I'm so worried about the future, how could it work? Will it work? The only person that knows about this is my best friend, it's so hard being so in love with someone and not being able to gush to everyone about how happy you are.
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