Jump to content

ElizabethMango

Senior Member
  • Content Count

    78
  • Joined

  • Last visited

    Never

Community Reputation

0 Neutral

About ElizabethMango

  • Rank
    Member

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Not Telling

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. Thank you. You have no idea how mucn of a help this place is for me.
  2. @GirlSaysWhat, I struggle with depression as well and it has lead to some dangerous situations in the past, which is why I'm considering telling someone. Thanks for the support. It is such a blessing that I have this site, because I don't know any other place I could talk about such things without being judged.
  3. Thanks LadyC. I don't have access to a pastor or school counselor, though. I don't think my family would shun me for confessing something like this, as they love me no matter what, but I definitely feel they would be majorly taken aback and probably grossed out. I just can't handle it anymore. I've been hiding this for several years, and after the way things panned out when I visited my cousin, I'm not okay.
  4. Hi guys, It's been a while since I visited this site, and I'm in a tough spot. At the end of October, I suddenly was given an opportunity to go down south to see my Dad's family. At this point, I hadn't seen my cousin in over a year. He was extremely busy with work and school, and it was looking like I wasn't going to see him at all, but the night before I left he came over with his sister at 11:30 and stayed for about 45 minutes. The visit was heart wrenchingly bittersweet. When he came in the door, I jumped up and nearly knocked him over when I tackled him for a hug. It felt like such a deep, soul-level relief to be near him again, like I'd let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding. The sad part was that he was acting very strange, and as result, the visit was awkward and not at all the happy reunion I'd pictured. He would act uncharacteristically kind and gentle with me one minute, and then distant and stiff the next. He thanked me for the "cute card" and birthday gifts I'd sent over a few days before. Part of me wonders if he suspected the truth after he read the birthday card. He made no move to make further contact and after he left I'm ashamed to say that I totally fell apart and cried. I wondered why he even came to visit me. He didn't seem nearly as happy to see me as I was him, and that hurt. My sisters say it was just him being awkward, but I don't know........ Since returning home, I have become increasingly depressed and anxious, to the point where it's affecting my ability to sleep and eat. My family (parents, siblings) don't know, and I'm starting to wonder if I should just break down and tell them the truth. I am so scared of them finding out, though! Being separated from my cousin for over a year has hurt me in ways I never anticipated, and after visiting with him last month, I am really going downhill emotionally. We've never been separated at all before this, and I literally can't imagine my life without him. Where do you draw the line and decide if it's worth it to reach out for help? Loving your cousin has so much stigma, it's hard to come forward about it. Help? -Elizabeth
  5. Thanks for the sympathy Scarlet. It's definitely more intense with cousin love, isn't it? I wonder why? I'm sorry about your cousin dumping you to sleep around. That's no way to treat someone who loves and cares for you so deeply. I guess as far as mine goes, I'm just going crazy. I can't hack being separated from him, and if telling him means he might push me away, I'm not sure if I can do it. But then not telling him means I'll have to watch any chance of us being together go up in smoke. What a mess, right?
  6. After months of intense deliberation, I'm trying to decide if it's worth telling my cousin that I love him as more than a cousin. I feel like it's a big moral dilemma and I can't seem to make heads or tails of it. Is it right of me to hide something so big from him, especially if we are going to continue on as "friends"?. And even if we don't end up being close friends anymore, am I doing right by him to deceive him on such an issue? One of the biggest worries (aside from actually telling him) is that if I am not upfront and honest about my feelings, he may end up sussing them out himself and then becoming upset with me for "lying to him". Our relationship is kind of in a fragile state, where every choice has to be thought about carefully, and I keep wondering if coming out into the open may be what I need to do in order to push things one way or the other. Any advice?
  7. Hi Broski. Welcome to the site! :grin: I'd say you have your work cut out for you, as far as your cousin is concerned. I second Nessa's idea to flirt. Can't hurt to try the old "if you weren't my cousin..." line, also. If you're feeling rather bold or the moment feels right, you could just open up to her and tell her that you have feelings for her. It definitely helps that she is understanding and forgiving. A few years ago, one of my cousins came to me and told me that he had feelings for me, and while I didn't return his feelings, I certainly admired his honesty and confidence in approaching me with such a bold message, to put it mildly. Best of luck and I hope it goes well!
  8. Tom, if you're upset and worried she's not telling the truth, wouldn't it be best to ask her for yourself? Let her know you aren't judging, but that it bothers you that she won't tell you what's up. Is it just that you want to know if she messed around with her cousin, or are you worried she is cheating? My two cents is, if you think there is/was something funky going on between her and her cousin, you might be right. Since coming to this site, I've come to see that more people have fooled around with their cousins than I previously thought. Take care.
  9. Are you perhaps worried that since Anna is essentially pissed at you for turning her down, that she might try and ruin it for you and your cousin? It's a tricky situation you've gotten into, indeed. I know you said you don't want to just jump in and start bugging your cousin to go out, so my advice would be to try and continue getting to know her, and possibly try and smooth things over with Anna as best you can, so her chances of messing your situation are minimalized. The more comfortable your cousin gets with you, the more likely you'll be able to gauge her possible interest. Keep us posted.
  10. ElizabethMango

    Help?

    Sorry for my late reply. Well, it's definitely good you guys have been talking, and even better that you've been able communicate rather openly about the situation at hand. Getting things out in the open is progress. It sounds to me like he needs more time to digest the information and formulate his opinions. I know you're probably going crazy with wanting to talk to him, but I'd let him be for a little bit, just because you don't want to bombard the guy with too much all at once. It could also be, as Scarlet pointed out, that he is going back-and-forth in his mind in regards to his girlfriend. There's a whole hell of a lot of stuff for him to consider right now, and he could be having trouble not only admitting his feelings for you, but also acknowledging that he has a girlfriend and that means he kinda has to "choose". Catch my drift? For the time being, I say wait it out and see what comes of things. He mentioned that he didn't want your story to end up like LadyC's, which means he does care, in some way. Keep the updates coming.
  11. Welcome to the site! Glad to hear your cousin and wife get on with you so well!
  12. Hmmm, that's odd. Do you think he plans on being with his girlfriend long term?
  13. Do you think that she is having kids on purpose to keep him around? Sorry if I'm a bit confused.
  14. Wait, your cousin is having a baby with his ex?
  15. Gosh, it's hard to say. My cousin is mysterious as all frickin' get-out, so I feel your pain here. Is he the kind of person who doesn't show his true feelings (Mr. Poker-Face, like my cousin), or is he generally a what-you-see-is-what-you-get kinda guy? I don't really know what to make of his response to the "wanting the forbidden fruit" question you asked him. I'd be tempted to read into thinga too if I was in your situation, so don't feel bad. How has he responded to your flirting in the past?
×
×
  • Create New...