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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

      Be informed on better ways to stay safe on the web -- Source: Mozilla

ley_b

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About ley_b

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  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Spring Creek, NV
  1. Registration Email?

    It won't let me message you, KC. I had the same issue when I tried to message LadyC. She had to message me.
  2. Registration Email?

    Ok I will.that's weird, I wonder what I got banned for? I haven't even been on in like a year until recently lol.
  3. Registration Email?

    Question: How do I change my user name and add a profile photo from my mobile devise?
  4. Hello LadyC,

    Been a while since I was on or chatted with you, but I received an email from someone that I would like to verify and double check with you about. Could you please message me, it won't let me message you for some reason. 

  5. dating my second cousin

    Hit your knees and thank the Lord for showing you a blessing in disguise! That is amazing! It was meant to be, if you ask me. Nothing happens by accident, it's all part of a Devine plan, my friend.
  6. How old are y'all? And is he married?
  7. Not Sure What To Do

    Hello, I recieved your PM and replied, now reading farther in depth to the situation I can not only relate, but offer some hopeful advice. I'm married to my second cousin. I'm 26, my husband, John, is 29. We have 3 children, I have two, he has 1. We have been together for a year and a half. We have been married for 6 months. We were engaged 6 months prior to getting married. Our relationship started out as just sex. I lived in Las Vegas, he lived 8 hours north, in Elko, Nevada. I invited him on a drunken river float in Laughlin, NV. For me, a romance blossomed that weekend, (for him too, I was just the first to admit it.) We went on to see each other once every month. Our long distance relationship went on for a year as we got more and more serious each month. For us, sex turned into so much more! Now, that's not every situation, though. Now comes the drama of it all. My parents, totally supportive. His family, totally NOT! They went to great lengths to break us up... And I mean GREAT lengths! They went as far as using his son against him, telling him that he would lose his son when his ex found out about us. So, they made him choose: me or them. And they succeeded. But only for 3 weeks. In the 3 weeks that we were broken up, (I went back to Vegas) we still kept in contact. But he lied to me and made a huge mistake, not once but twice. He went out with his buddies, got drunk and had sex with an ex girlfriend. Twice. In the mean time, I come back to Elko to get the rest of my things and find out about him and this ex. He knew at that point I never wanted to see or speak to him again because he hurt me so bad. He asked me to forgive him and said he loved me and he was lost and confused. I knew he was being genuine because months leading up to our break up he was not himself. He asked me to hear him out, so I did. He apologized for what he did, his family and how he felt alone and the house that had become a home felt cold. He missed the family we created and swore to spend the rest of his life making it up to me. Then he asked me to marry him. So, the next day we drove to Vegas and got married. I know you're wondering why I'm telling you all this... And the reason being that it may seem pretty crappy right now, but if you truly love him, don't give up. We never told John's family, we let them figure it out on their own. Mostly because john just didn't know how to tell them and I wasnt about to push him to do so. In my opinion, were adults. Who we choose to be with is none of their business. We don't need their blessing, nor their approval. Now, we're Christians and when things got really bad for me during the break up, I prayed. I asked for guidenice and strength to endure whatever God will was for me. And then I gave it to God and let him do his work. And here I am now, 6 months later, happily married, in-laws still hate me, won't talk to me or my husband... Hell they are even best friends with his ex now, who also hates me. But none of that bothers us because we're happy. His parents, grandparents and his ex don't want this marriage. But we do, and God does, so we prevail. I sure hope this all helps. If anything I pray it gives you hope. Have faith, and dont worry about the fact that you had sex with him already. Just focus on what you can fix now, communicate with him, tell him how you feel and be supportive of his feelings. I don't remember asking John where this was going, I just went with it because it felt so right. I know after a while we just both had the same future plans. So hang in there.
  8. Britt, I am married to my second cousin. We were long distance for a year before I finally moved in with him. We were even engaged for 6 months prior to me moving in. His family was NOT happy about it. His family tried and succeeded at breaking us up back in December. They used his son as their selling point, saying the mother would not approve and she would take his son away and that he would get made fun of in school. My husband's parents found a way to manipulate their 29 year old son into making a choice - me or them. He chose them and we broke up for 3 weeks. When I came back to get the rest of mine and my children's things from his house, he realized he had made a mistake and asked me to marry him that weekend! We got married and wrote letters to his family breaking the news. They never responded. Before we got really serious he was close to his family. When they broke us up, they tried harder to control him, he saw their true colors. Since we have been married his parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles no longer try to contact him. They all said how much they loved him and were there for him when they were trying to break us up. But since he made a choice for himself and married me they want nothing to do with him. Simply turned their backs on him. He, however, is ok with this. Because we're happy and for the first time in his 29 years of life, he has set himself free from needing their constant approval on every decision he makes. Moral of the story... His family is going to do and say whatever they want to persuade his decision. They will make threats, take his nieces and nephews away from him, even cut him off. But in the end he needs to do what makes HIM happy. It's his life, his happiness and his future. They may be mad, but they won't stay mad forever. And if they do, it's their loss. My husband hasn't once regretted the decision he made since we got married. He is ten times the man he was before we got married. Love is not selfish, if my husband and your boyfriends family truly loved them, they would support their happiness. Period. Hope this helps. Keep the faith, give it to God. Ley
  9. New love with my cousin

    Andy, You're not wrong. The first weekend my second cousin and I spent together was magical. That's when I fell in love with him. I too knew at that moment, he was my soul mate. Not long after that he admitted it too. The heart wants what it wants, and who's to say that its wrong. If you both want this, then just go for it. Screw everyone else. Best wishes, Ley
  10. Need Help

    Sg21, I can relate to your situation. I am now married to my second cousin. I have a 5 year old and a 3 year old, he has an 8 year old. We dated long distance for a year before I moved in with him. Right before Christmas, his parents got involved in our relationship, they used his son against him, they said that his son's mother would not approve and take the his son away from him. They said our children would be made fun of in school, that he could lose his job and his friends. They brain washed him, a 29 year old man. He told me he didn't think he could put the kids through any of that, that he loved his family and didn't want to hurt them, especially his son. So, we broke up and I moved back home. We we're broken up for 3 weeks, I gave him his space, but he kept ties with me. Telling me he loved me and missed me, we talked as though we were still together. During this time he hung out with and slept with an old ex girlfriend, (which i found out later). But when I came back to his house to get the rest of my things, he confessed all, and realized what a mistake he had made. He was lost. He was being pressured by his family and it was to their own undoing and control over him that he finally saw their true colors. He tried to fill the void of missing the family we had together by taking comfort in an old girlfriend, only to make himself feel worse. Men are funny creatures, some cannot live up to the pressure. And some have to have a drastic moment of self loath to get a grip on what they really want! So my advice to you, as hard as it is and I know because, I too, went through it, let him go. Give it to God. If it's meant to be, he will do his thing and not be able to fill the void left in your absence. I'm not saying you have to move on right away, but do things to better yourself, keep yourself busy working on YOU. Not that you're a bad person, but when we focus on being the best we can be, all other things fall into place. I hope this helps and I wish you the best of luck. Everyone in this forum has been through this at one point. Just have faith. Ley
  11. Do you tell people that you're cousins?

    KC said it perfectly!! My husband and I don't go around shouting it to the world, or to strangers. But if asked how we met or how long we've known each other, then I do tell. My husband isn't ashamed of it but isn't quite as me either. He's told friends and co-workers, but not strangers who ask about us, there's where he looks at me and I'm usually the one to blurt it out and make light of the subject. In fact, majority of the people we've told have opened up and admitted to either having a crush on a cousin of theirs at one point or another, and some have even mentioned they know a cousin couple. Most in which have been together/married for years! Which honestly makes me happy to hear!
  12. Cousin Relation and Birth Questions

    WarChild, I am married to my second cousin, although we want and plan to have children together, his family already hates the thought of us being together and is even more disgusted by the thought of us having a baby together. Therefore, I looked into this extensively just to prove to my husbands family that there is nothing to worry about. Second cousins only share 3.327% DNA. The only concern you should worry about is the hereditary family medical history, for example: My husband's grandfather, and my grandma (who are brother and sister) BOTH have diabetes. So does my husbands dad. But neither one of us do. BUT, since it runs in our family, that is one of the things our child could inherit. My best advise, if you're that worried about it, would be to seek genetic counseling. Best of luck, Ley
  13. Cousin couple seeking answers

    Not really sure I have much helpful advise in this, seems to be "helpless" situation. But, I think if i was in your shoes I would ride things out, stay low key and first focus on gaining custody of my children. After that, my next move would be planning to relocate. I know it has a lot to do with your cousins job and the years he's invested there but, at the end of the day money can always be made else where. If this is a relationship you both feel strongly about and want to seriously pursue marriage then you BOTH have to be willing to make the sacrifices and put in the work. I know that's probably not what you wanted to hear, but it's purely JUST my opinion. My strongest advise would be to just pray on it, give it to God. Ask his for guidance and ask him for a sign. He will always provide. Wishing you LOTS of love and luck, Ley
  14. Second Cousin

    I think shes made a few flirting passes at you and she might be interested, from what it sounds like. On the other hand, you guys are pretty young, but I never want to be the one to use that excuse because my friends parents have been together since they were 14 and 15 years old! So, with that being said, it is possible! On the other hand, ignore the older sister. It's not her you like anyways, focus on your crush. Your dad seems to be in support of it at least which is a great start!
  15. Never lose faith, follow your heart.

    GirlSaysWhat and luvher4ever, Thank you both, very much. I don't regret sticking with it, and in our case, John just needed someone to prove they really cared about him and were there for him. Which I was. His family has never been supportive of his own decisions in the last 29 years of his life. I'm happy he found his voice, his faith and was able to do this for himself. And it's true, luvher4ever, there aren't enough success stories on here, which is why I pray our story may bring hope to others. That it also may give other people in John's shoes the guidance and strength to follow their own heart, just like he did, and he did so without regret! Quick update: John and I have not heard from any of his family members, nor have we tried to reach out to any of them. We figure when they are ready, they will come to us. Not sure if that's the right path, but that's what we've chosen to stick with. On the other hand, we have my parents, and a few family members who support us 100%, and a few friends too.
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