Serendipity, thank you so much for your reply and your positive words. It is weird as I really have never felt shame before but as the kids get older I suddenly realized I will have to tell them which means they may tell other people which in turn makes me feel nervous! But I will work through this emotion so I am strong for when the time come round. We live in Australia where there are no restrictions on cousin marriage. All the best with your marriage.
So I posted my story briefly in love stories and I've been torturing myself for the past few days. Suddenly out of the blue I realized that at some point we are going to have to tell our children who in turn may want to tell friends.......we keep the fact that we are 2nd cousins strictly need to know only. Our family know and are fine with it and one friend. Everyone else we mention being vaguely related if it ever arises. So our children are getting to the point where we will need to tell them in more detail, but I really don't want them to tell their friends. I know some people will judge us and I don't want to lose friends in a situation where I don't feel our background is relevant to our family. So how do I go about being open with the kids without them being open with others (until they can work out who to trust) And if you are a child with parents who are cousins or 2nd cousins how did you feel/cope when you were told?