I recently met up with my cousins during the family gathering.The awkwardness began a while after she and my aunt picked me and my mum up from the train station.As we walked to her car , we were having random questions about things in our lives.When we were talking,we accidentally bump into each other while walking side by side.Then, I am surprised and I looked at her as any normal reaction after bumping a person. She was surprised too.
This was the first awkward moment.Another awkward moment was that after we reside at my aunt’s house, I went for a bath which was in her room that set up for me and my mum as their guests.Then , she walked into the room without knowing that I was in there changing which she caught me half naked with only pants on.So we both shocked and I turned around and all she saw was my back.Then , she apologize and I said ‘ it’s ok’ while she is looking at my back.From then on,we were quite shy with each other but I still initiated conversations otherwise.
The first night of our family gathering,we went for a gathering dinner to meet up with other cousins and relatives.I was in her car having interesting conversation about her life while we were enjoying our conversation.After we reached the restaurant, she chose to come by to sit beside me when my uncle and aunt asked her to sit with them.I was quiet the whole time during the dinner and we haven’t spoken a word until she spoke to another cousin brother of mine and involved me in the conversation yet I still talked less around her because I am confused around her all the time.After that dinner before going into her car,she told me that following her was my uncle and aunt’s arrangement.I guess she was disappointed with my quiet mouth or maybe she wasn’t interested and wouldn’t wanted me to misunderstand further or anything.
Then ,the following morning, we had conversation about each other’s hobbies.She then asked ‘Did I involve in sports?’.I answered ‘yes except a few.I am also a black belt in karate’.Then , she asked me ‘Are you flexible?’.I answered ‘ As in?I guess yes’.Then I talked about her hobbies and plants at her house.Then I tag along when she fetched my another uncle and aunt to airport.After dropping them off,we had quite a fruitful conversation in the car about our personal interests.She never really looked me in the eyes all the time compared to the stories I have heard so far in here.Then she showed me the song we talked about after we reached her house.
During my last day,my uncle wanted to fetch us to the train station but she insisted she will do that.My uncle insisted on fetching.However,it ended up her fetching.My aunt eventually tagged along in the car.I forgot to wish her an advance birthday and her birthday was the following day.Then I wished her the next day through text and I don’t have her phone number so I texted my aunt and my aunt delivered the message to her.Then two days later, she texted me with her number and said my aunt passed her my number .She also offered to help me whenever I needed one.
Another part about my feelings is that I had a crush on her at the age on 12 if I am not mistaken.It was the first time I met her and I was so carefree that I annoyed her(you know kid’s behaviors) because I felt so strongly at that age.As time goes by,my feelings faded and her appearance during family gathering really ignited certain feelings and refreshen certain memories from the past although the feelings from the past faded.Maybe it’s there and it’s always there.I guess it requires the right time to push the button or maybe I overthink things.We were born the same year and I’m born 7 months after her.The reason why I am still single until my adulthood is because I am constantly searching for characteristics similar to hers.She is still one of a kind for me.I am not sure whether she felt the same for me.Does she has feelings for me? Sorry for writing this long.