Hello, first time here and am having quite the difficulty typing this out as it is 4am and everything is on my mind.
Basically, ive always liked my cousin from when we were little. Growing up in a middle eastern family i was taught that it is ok to marry your cousin, etc, and have therfor always sought after it as i know her very well through these years and my feelings have only gotten stronger. idk if she likes me, but, in todays society i dont know if its a good thing to do; wouldnt it have to be kept hidden or something? I am only 18 years of age (male) and i know this is kind of weird but i feel like if we were together wede have to hide it for sure or something as everyone makes all the alabama jokes etc, aswell as having a child im afraid he may face abuse from it aswell if theyre friends found out or something. i have done research on the genetic disorders possible from cousin marriages and think it should be fine, (although my worse fear is having a child with some deformities etc from when i was young). so basically i have no idea what to do, if i should wait untill im older, tell her to see if i should wait for something like that, or just forget about it? im afraid if i do go for someone else i would find out later that she was into me all along; or that if i wait and see what happens that i will find out she never liked me all along and i wasted all that time waiting. any advice will be useful, sorry for weird typing im pretty tired.