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quarter25

Hello! first time posting a topic :)

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Hello! Never posted before but I have been lurking for awhile and not too long ago sought out some advice from Lady C and Hawk privately, just wanted to tell my story :azn:

I'm 25 and my cousin/boyfriend is 32, we're first cousins and our fathers are brothers.

We didn't grow up together, I vaguely remember hearing about him at all though knew his older brother very well since he would visit often (they grew up on the east coast).

We've been friends on fb for about 5 years but hadn't talked to each other till about 2 years ago.

We found out quickly that we had a lot in common and that our personalities were very similar, we began messaging each other one night while I was at work and continued to do so every day after that, we would talk for hours about pretty much anything, it was so nice to have someone I really connected with to talk to :azn:

After a while I got the impression that he might like me more than a cousin but quickly pushed it from my mind, that would be crazy (lol) well one day he pulled out the go to line "if you weren't my cousin..." which obviously confirmed my previous suspicion, I wasn't shocked and I didn't completely dismiss it, I rationalized that we never met and that he was basically the male version of me (I told him all of this) but we were related and at the time I was in a relationship no matter how crappy it was.

He wasn't exactly happy with my response, not angry in any way just kind of bummed out and was embarrassed that he even brought it up, I reassured him that it was perfectly normal and that under different circumstances I could definitely see us together, he dropped the subject and things carried on as though it never happened but there was some noticeable tension.

Some time went by and he brought it up again, said his feelings for me were very strong and that he couldn't stop thinking about me, I told him it wasn't possible for us to be together and that he would have no problem finding a girlfriend he could actually have a relationship with, he's attractive, funny, intelligent, respectful.. a true gentleman.. not to mention I've seen some of his ex's so I had no clue why he would want to be with me.

That back and forth went on for awhile (months I believe) it was very emotional for the both of us, I could no longer deny having feelings for him, he was everything I'd ever wanted in a boyfriend and I was in an emotionally/mentally abusive relationship that was barely even a relationship, we were more like roommates, it was a giant roller coaster for a little bit.

At some point I let him know how I truly felt but still didn't think a romantic relationship would work out, we would confess our love secretly but being together was impossible.

I ended it with my boyfriend at the time, once I realized how strong my feelings were for my cousin I couldn't continue dating him, I felt awful no matter how horrible he was to me.

A few weeks after that my cousin and I arranged to meet for the very first time, we were nervous, excited and not exactly sure what would happen.

When I got off the train he greeted me with the most loving, generous  and beautiful smile I've ever seen, we hooked arms and he led me to the bus stop, I wanted to smoke before the bus came and when I looked up to ask him for a light he kissed me ♡ instant fireworks.

We've been together since that day (1 year 4 months) family isn't thrilled but the majority are happy that we're happy, the only person who's cut me out of their life is my twin sister oddly enough, ex's haven't been a problem thankfully.

I moved in with him in November and 1month ago we had our beautiful daughter Rachel :grin: my son is beyond excited to be a big brother and his two girls couldn't be happier to be big sisters ♡

It's crazy to think about, at times I still can't believe this is real, but it is. Life is amazing and I am truly blessed ♡♡♡

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Hello.

Your story sounds very similar to my own. Isn't it lovely when you're able to finally be with the person you are meant to?

I recently moved in with my partner and second cousin and our baby is due in September.

I too had major issues with my sister regarding my relationship but she didn't go as far as to disown and is coming around.....although I still sense some tension.

I'm very happy for you.

Best of luck.

K x

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Welcome Quarter25!

Thank you for sharing this wonderful story.  I'm inspired by those who have taken the step to let there love shine and be who they are.

Congrats on Rachel!  Children are a blessing.😄

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Congrats Kate! It's definitely amazing being with the man of my dreams, wish we could have been together sooner  :grin: I think once my sister actually meets her niece she'll come around, if not then it's her loss sadly  :undecided:

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Congrats Kate! It's definitely amazing being with the man of my dreams, wish we could have been together sooner  :grin: I think once my sister actually meets her niece she'll come around, if not then it's her loss sadly  :undecided:

Glad your with the man of your dreams, always nice hearing happy endings. As for your sister, if she doesn't't come round then it is her loss and yes sadly but you've to think of your own happiness :smiley:

nessa76

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Thank you  :smiley:  Exactly, what's funny is she's in a relationship that no one really approved of in the beginning but none of us cut her or her now husband out of our lives. She thinks my relationship is unhealthy but it's the healthiest relationship I've ever been in, my son's dad was emotionally and mentally abusive and all of us were miserable.

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Thank you  :smiley:  Exactly, what's funny is she's in a relationship that no one really approved of in the beginning but none of us cut her or her now husband out of our lives. She thinks my relationship is unhealthy but it's the healthiest relationship I've ever been in, my son's dad was emotionally and mentally abusive and all of us were miserable.

She should be happy for you both and concentrate on her own relationship instead of claiming yours to be a so called "unhealthy" one :smiley:

nessa76

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I hope she does too but if she doesn't, well like you said it's her loss.

You can't sacrifice your own happiness on the basis of worrying whether your sister comes round or not.

As long as he's good with you, that's all that matters. Glad your out of that abusive relationship, nobody needs to live with an abuser.

Those type are insecure, feel the need to control you but at least your with a Guy you love and who treats you good, with respect too  :smiley:

nessa76

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Exactly! That's why we decided to just go for it, those we love would want nothing but for us to be happy whether they agreed with the relationship or not. Thank you  :smiley:  it was obviously rough  :undecided: I'm extremely lucky to be with my bf he's absolutely amazing  :grin: 

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They would want nothing but for you both to be happy, you deserve to be :smiley:

I can imagine it was rough being in an abusive relationship. I had a so called friend like that, mental and emotional abuse through jealousy and insecurity  :rolleyes:

nessa76

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Yeah that's usually where it stems from. He cheated on me early in our relationship and I ended up staying with him, he thought that since he hurt me in that way that someday I would do the same to him. He was very controlling, moody, verbally abusive, it was tough but I kept hoping one day he would change. I tried to make it work for 9 years but it stayed the same, I wasn't looking for another relationship but I'm certainly glad my cousin came into my life, I haven't been this happy in a long time  :grin:  :cheesy:  :smiley: 

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Once a cheater, always a cheater. Not always but I'd say in most cases it is :smiley:

Glad you've never been this happy, good thing to be :smiley:

nessa76

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