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Experianced couples help please

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Alright guys and ladies. the unthinkable has happened and im not sure what to do.

Me and Amanda have been together for a little over 4 years now, may 2016 will be 5 years.

We have been through a lot of shit ranging from me having difficulty's with being able to deal with her youngest daughter, to her brother recently passing away.

Our relationship has been tested and for the past 4 years we have surpassed every test and have been doing amazing together.

On to the good stuff.

So for the past several months maybe 6 or little more ( i honestly cant remember ) Amanda has had what we thought kidney infections that seem to go away then come back, so about a week ago or maybe it was 2 weeks ago, she went in to have it looked at and they suggested she also get a papsmere ( misspelled i know ) So she gets all that stuff done and we go about our life.

So this past Monday morning i get a call from my sister that my grandfather has had  a stroke and they arent sure hes going to make it ( he did end up passing ) so my Monday started off pretty shitty from that, so i leave work early and talk Amanda into coming home from work early also just so we can be together. I notice tho she keeps telling me how much she loves me and she wants to make sure i know that.( this has happened pretty much all through the morning before i picked her up from work ) So we get home im kinda sad about my grandfather wishing i had seen him more and just spent more time with him, but while im sitting on the couch thinking about him i notice Amanda has a blank stair, and as you cousins know, you can feel when something isnt wright. SO i bug her over and over to tell me wtf is wrong with her and eventually she does. her stomach pains and what we thought was kidney infections that would return turns out to be an STD......................... About a year ago we split up for about 5 days, she slept with someone within 3 days of us splitting up... and has unprotected sex at that......... She has been at my beckon the last 48 hours and has broke down so many times Im in and out of my feelings especially since this has now taking over the time i should be using to morn the loss of my grandfather.

It just sucks because we had that purity about our relationship you know. Almost every couple in the USA has cheated not all but most, and i didn't want us to be that couple you know. I wanted to be the only man she ever needed i never wanted her to have to replace me for another man and she did. its hurts like nothing i have ever felt.

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you need to let it go. at the time it occurred, you were split up. that means she was not cheating on you. get this thing treated and move ahead with your life together. quit looking backwards... because THIS has changed NOTHING. you already knew last year that you had split up. surely during those five days you wondered if she might have slept with someone else. and she probably has always wondered if you slept with someone else during those five days. 

now you know. she did. get over it. the only thing that matters is whether you two have always been faithful while you were together. well no, there is one other thing that matters, and that is how you handle knowing what happened when you weren't. she wasn't a virgin when she met you. you weren't either. what she did during that five days is no more relevant to your relationship (outside of both of you being treated for the STD) than what either of you did before you met.

oh, and if you also slept with someone during those five days (or even kissed someone else) then don't let her go around carrying all the guilt that you are imposing on her over this. if you did the same thing she did, then fess up.

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