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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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Tham

She is my second cousin

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Tham    0

Hi I need all ur support n ideas to marry my girls. We loved for 9 years and am 30 yrs old she s 26. She got married cos her dad emotionally threatened her.but sure she won't live with that new guy still she s crazy about me n our love. I ready to accept her now and like the same she is now. All we need s to stay out of our home n want to live life for our own out side India or ple suggest me with any possibilities to get her back.Am from a hindhu religion southern part of India

Kindly advice with possible ideas,

Regards

Tham

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LadyC    94

she's old enough to make her choices. and her choice was to let her dad bully her into a marriage she didn't want. you have no options here. if she wasn't strong enough to stand up to her dad and refuse to marry someone she didn't love, then she's not going to be strong enough to stand up to him now and leave her new husband for you. like it or not, she's a married woman. and that means she's off limits. period.

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Tham    0

It's not lik that she s strong enough to come with me if not she s not even ready to live his new marriage life with that guy and I once made her pregnant thus the reason am saying he won't live n other hand her father in bad health condition

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LadyC    94

and that same cultural background that is the reason she married someone she doesn't love is the same cultural background that will be the reason she stays married.

she's still off limits. sorry dude.

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Tham    0

Today i talked with her she said would come to me some times later, and is not in the situation to react

whole family knew about this issue and they very causious she should not talk or see me again still my mind and soul longing for her and need her at any  cost.

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Romalee    26

We aren't going to change our advice and there is no need to continue to try to influence us otherwise

by continuing to try to convince us you that you need advice on how to get with your cousin.

OK-----  SHE IS MARRIED!  OFF LIMITS TO YOU.  Lady C has told you that twice as have I.  I'm done.

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Romalee    26

Do you honestly think she is going to divorce him??

Where is your reality? Better get back to it.

If she WERE to divorce him, it would have to be of her own decision. Without ANY

influence from you.  Bottom line is you NEED TO BACK OFF AND LEAVE HER BE! 

If at sometime in the future she should become available again that would be a

different story.   As of now the advice still stands.   LEAVE HER BE>

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Hawk    29

Tham,

You have lost her. You lost her to her father more surely than you have to her husband. The time to kick her father in the family jewels and tell him to butt the hell out has LONG passed. My advice is to move far away, and make a fresh start for YOU, with new friends who will support YOU. Eventually, you will find a woman who WILL stand up for YOU. Everyone else has had their say in your life, and if you don't start living it for you, you will have lived your life for everyone BUT YOU. Go make a life for yourself on YOUR terms. And, don't hold your breath waiting on her to get divorced and come looking for you. BED, MADE, LAY. As in, she didn't have the nerve to stand up for you, succumbed to her fathers will, and in doing so, made her bed, and now she'll have to lay in it.

Move on, and the sooner the better, believe me. I want you to do as I've said, then come back in one year from now, and tell me I was wrong. You won't, because I'm right, and deep down, you know it. It's just so fresh, you're not thinking clearly yet. You need a break. You need a clean break, and a change of scenery. Now, go to it....

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