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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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Guest DeathlyFairy

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you don't. when someone likes you it comes from their own desire, not a desire forced on them. you can't "make" somebody like you. and right now, you need to focus on other things. i know that's a hard thing to do, but if you don't learn how to control your desires and hormones now, you're going to get hurt over and over again as you grow older, and the constant feeling of being used will really destroy your self worth.

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you are so walking on dangerous ground. your boyfriend clearly has no respect for you. please have more respect for yourself than he does and tell him to take a long hike off a short pier. listen, i know you think it's just pure fun to get all sexual at the age of 17, but that kind of fun is like jumping out of a plane without a chute. you WILL have a crash landing, and it's going to hurt. you remember that in about five years when you're feeling like a chewed up piece of USDA Prime. girl, you want to be loved and valued and treasured by a man. THIS is not the way to do it. you're headed for about 5 tons of heartache.

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As LadyC said, your boyfriend has NO respect for you but probably none for himself either!

Have respect for yourself and dignity, your worth more than being with this ass hole.

If your Cousin does feel anything like the way you do, then it's a plus but if not you need to move on and find someone who wants to be with you. It is a dangerous game your playing, heartache is not worth it. Not from your Cousin or your boyfriend either!

Good luck

nessa76

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well we don't give advice of that sort here.

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He does have respect for me. It's something we enjoy doing TOGETHER.  Because WE like it. But anyway, at any moment I asked advice about my relationship, just about how to seduce my cousin.

Do a Google search instead, we don't support or encourage open relationships but if that's what you want find advice or information over the internet instead!

nessa76

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The mom in me is kicking in since I have daughters around your age, and I am going to speak to you like I would to them.

As a mom, I would feel so disappointed in myself that I didn't teach you to respect yourself more than you do.  Sexual intimacy does not a relationship make, and that is what you have concluded.

You said that you have sexual desires for your cousin, that you only want to seduce him and to introduce him into sex play with you and your BF - not that you are interested in a relationship with him. If you really are only interested in sex, there are plenty of guys who would take you up on that offer.  Going that route with a cousin can create more drama that you are prepared for, so just don't do it.  But more than that, respect yourself enough not to just hop into bed with someone willy nilly.  LadyC is quite right that you are heading for a crash landing.  Heed her advice!

I am concerned that a 9 year old initiated sexual contact with you when you were 5.  That is a huge red flag to me that something is amiss.  And if you were the one who initiated it, then I have a dozen red flags waving!  I do not need to know the details of that encounter - but it is something for you to reflect upon.

The folks on this board are not going to encourage a 17 year old girl to be promiscuous.  However, if you ever want advice on how to initiate or maintain a cousin RELATIONSHIP, we are here for you.

You are 17, and I would presume, about to graduate high school.  Focus on your school work, take the ACT - again if you have once and need to raise your score, get involved in a school club, volunteer, get a job; do something to make you a better you.  In the long run, you will be glad you did!

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