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Guest j001

From the UK in love with 1st cousin.

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Hi all.

Where  do i start.

I have been having an intimate relationship with my cousin for 10 month's.  This came totally out of the blue. After a family party we both had a few drinks back at mine. We chatted for hours putting the world to rights, about relationships past and present. It came out of nowhere really..we had a moment..looking at eachother and we kissed.  It just exploded from that point onwards. I woke up the next day and he made excuses to call round. We spoke..i said this couldnt happen and he left. Both of us still very flirty. My main problem being im in a long term relationship.

The connection the feelings towards him where there.  Like nothing ive ever felt. I knew i loved him very early on. He also feels the same.  We have been seeing eachother as much and as often as we can, basically embarking on a full relationship but hiding this from our friends family etc and whilst im still living  and with another man.

My relationship with this other man is currently not a relationship in the sense we are not and have not been sleeping together and im naking excuses  so i can be with my cousin as often as i can. I have been in this relationship for 14 years and whilst i love him i dont think im in love anymore and theres alot of things i feel i should have or feel as a woman and he just doesnt seem to get that.  This was an issue prior to my cousin for a long time also.

My cousin and i are untouchable when we are together..it feels so right. Im moody  up and down and lost at times without him and im becoming something im not when we are apart. Im usually  happy, upbeat and cheery. People have started to notice.

With my cousin the arguments are horrid..they are full of rage and way way too much at times but we always come back to one another.

His mum kinda knows somethings  there between us..my family dont appear to know. Im worried what people will do and say and how we will be treated locally if we make a go of it. He doesnt care he says he loves me too much. I love him just the same i just want to know we are both doing the right thing and we will last and his life wont be  :shocked:  up along with mine if we drifted apart.

Its all very scarey but no one makes me feel how he does. Im totally in love. Im 31 hes 23. Any advice would help thanks.

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I think resolve with your 14 year relationship should happen before continuing to pursue your cousin. Sounds like there is a lot of confusion and emotions going on with your love life... maybe consider talking to a relationship counselor.

I hope you find some peace and calm before making a big decision. Good luck.

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