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Need advice on what to do now

Guest Banff86

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Guest Banff86

Hello everyone.

I am new here and only signed up for advice.

My first cousin and I have been close as brother and sister since we where kids. Now as adults he recently told me that he has always been sexually attracted to me but out of respect for me he has held back his feelings.

He is a military veteran with PTSD and is an alcoholic.

Several months ago while he was drunk I was texting him to ask a question about a family get together.

He opened up completely which make me freak out at him. The next day he called and apologized for everything he said. Since then he has avoided me and the rest of the family only saying that he no longer deserves to be a part of the family.

I feel terrible and still care deeply for him but I refuse to engage intimatly with him.

I had thought about taking some suggestive pictures for him but make it clear that is as far as I will allow.

What should I say to him and should I take some pictures for him?

Thank you for your input.

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Guest Travis

Hey banff86.

That sounds like a complicated position. Your cousin seams to be truly sorry which is good.

If you can make it clear to him that your pictures are as far as you will allow and let him know how big of a deal it is that you will do that for him.

I would say go for it. Sounds like he can use a moral boost.

Also I would do your best to try and get him back with your family depending on if you have told anyone or not.

Hope this helps.


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  • Moderator

I have to disagree with Travis.

DO NOT take and send him any pictures. I feel that would only add fuel to his fire.

His PTSD and alcoholic situations are not an excuse for you to "enable" his fantasies.

He can get professional help with the first two. YOU are the only one that put a stop

to the last one.

You can let him know that you aren't going to "tell" the family on him, but you would like for him to join the family

function as he could use all the family support he can get.

Best wishes.

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Guest Hockey chick

Romalee is right. You should be careful that you don't send him the wrong message or end up making is situation worst.

If you decide to still take those pics for him. I would recommend not posing nude. Perhaps in a tight plain dress or if you are up to it pose with your bra and panties still on but no less. Try a few poses in front of a mirror first until you are comfortable with how you look first.

There is a ton of info online showing how to pose and snapping self shots.

Best of luck to you both.

P.S. A good ice breaker might be to first tell him about what you are planning and ask what he prefers you to wear or ideas for poses. Of course keeping in mind to lay down the boundaries if he asks to see more.

This will also excite him as he awaits your pics. It will make his day. :wink:  Have fun

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Guest Amanda23

Hi banff86, Your story reminds me of my experience. My oldest cousin is in the navy and while he was deployed we emailed each other back and forth almost every day. We have always been close and even experimented once with each other as teenagers which we agreed to not try again. He confessed that he thought about me nonstop. Because he was overseas and had no contact with any women during his deployment he asked me to send some sexy pictures of myself. I was a bit nervous my pictures would end up in the hands of some perv but eventually gave in because I trusted him. At first I took my pictures while laying on my bed half naked because I felt the most secure. After I had sent him the photos he replied that night telling me how hot I looked and asked me to send more. By the time I took the second batch of pictures I was already comfortable posing in lingerie and actually enjoyed myself. When he returned I deleted all the pictures I had sent him from his laptop. Since then we have still been just as close without it being awkward. I recommend you try a few shots for practice while wearing clothes until you feel comfortable. I'm sure he will enjoy any pictures of you that you send him so don't feel self conscious. Just try to have fun and don't take it too seriously otherwise you will appear to be awkward in every picture. I hope this helps. Take care of that trooper cousin of yours.

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Guest Hockey chick

Hey again banff86. Just a quick word of caution. If you are truly not interested in getting physical with your cousin be careful how much you show him and what you text. You might give him the impression that he has a shot with you. Unless you change your mind and want to fool around with him. I would suggest not to experiment any farther then pics. It sounds like he is a good guy though. Take some good pics for the guy. Enjoy

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