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Beaten n forced

Guest Wreck

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Hi everyone...i am in a secret relationship with my first cousin since almost 12yr nw-secret until recently.its not been an easy way,n it still isnt.it sucks to be hindu girl of 27yrs,people r all gaga about why ur not getting married n the pressure is unmanageable.

To mk it worst,my family got to know that my relatnship with my cousin was not over despite all previous family issues regarding us. I was beaten n whacked by my bro,i tried to stand up for myself,i tried calling the police n tried to take my bag n leave...but my mom ddnt let m n threatened to commit suicide...

now am expected to marry whoever they want and they expect me TO LIKE the guy for my own good instead of ruining my life with my cousin (he's a successful lawyer and a perfect gentleman-they said he's a goon lol...).i cnt do anything despite having the means to sustain my expenses....its sucks t be hindu smtms....

iv been in talks with a 'hetero-looking' gay wanting a coverup wedding.hes willing to travel to my country and meet my family.at least that would give me the opportunity to get out of this freaking house.i tried to tell my family about it amidst the hard slaps i was getting..that theres a guy i wanted to marry,but they said they dnt want to listen to my lies.

my cousin n myself r really sad n worried about losing each other...and getting married to a guy of my family's choice and sharing a bed with a stranger i dnt even want to see is not making sense...

my boyfriend encouraged me to be indepndent frm the mind n taught me t stand for myself like he did(his parents r not ok with us being tgether,but at least they cnt pressurise him for anything).but when i did...i was assaulted,told am wrst than a prostitute,was humiliated n insulted.

beside...if i do what they say,they will then want to force me into hving kids n it goes on n on.i want the freedom to live my life the way i want...but apparently its wrong!!!!! Its not only about my cousin...its also about my freedom to choose my life...but i was told that was selfish.

i feel the marriage of cnvenience wd b my last chance to leave from here...but it feels wrong. 

They have bn reminding me i was born with a debt to my parents,karma n what not.

But the bottomline is........i just want a quiet life smwhr abroad with my bf,forgotten and peaceful...

has anyone been in similar situations...?what did u do...?

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  • Administrator

as an american, i can't even begin to imagine how difficult it must be to walk in your shoes. and from my american perspective, i'd do whatever it takes to get out. whatever you choose to do, i wish you the best!


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You should go look at my immigration question and answe it I have read a lot of your response and they are so good please go and check it out please sorry for posting on this blog I just stared and dont know how to use this site thanks I'll be waiting for your responds lady C

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  • Moderator

Guest Wreck, I am so sorry you are going through this,  I wish there was a way for me to be of some help.  If you search through the posts there are several that deal specifically with the Hindu and Indian cultures, you may get some support and ideas from those posts.  Start a new thread with a subject line that specifically tells the readers that you are Hindu, that way you may attract others that understand better how to help you.  

If there is any way you and your cousin can leave your country and start somewhere fresh, that may be your best option.  Of course it would be difficult to leave behind everything you know and love, but it may be the only way for the two of you to make a life together.

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