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AlexFrost

Im in love with my second cousin help!

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AlexFrost    0

Hello, my name, is Alex and I’m in love with my second cousin, and I would like to seek for some advice on what to do. Some information about us first though, I’m 19 and she’s 18 our birthdays are exactly 13 days apart. I’ve known her for since I was 4 and since the day we met we’ve been close, fast forward to when I was 8 and I found myself having weird feelings for her, but of course, I was 8 and didn’t really know what it was that I felt so I blew it off. It was when I turned 10 that I found out that I found out that the feeling I felt back then was love for my cousin, but of course, I knew it was wrong since we were family. I thought that it was just a temporary thing and that in a few years it would go away, but boy was I wrong it did not go away at all, in fact, it just grew stronger with each year.

When we were kids we used to live next to each other letting us see each other almost daily, but later when I was 16 she moved away, only 1 hour away and I thought that would stop the feeling I had but nope they just grew stronger. We now see each other once a week to maybe twice or once a month. My feelings keep growing and it hurts to not tell her, and of course, I tried to like other girls but I just couldn’t because she would always be on my mind making that impossible to like other girls. She’s my favorite cousin just like I’m her favorite as well, I’m the only actual boy she ever talks to in her life unless it for school work (that’s what she’s told me) and we tell each other everything (except of course me telling her about how I feel about her), also when we see each other we usually split from our families to be by ourselves.

I want to tell her how I feel but I’m scared that if I do it will ruin the bond that we already have and make things awkward, and even if I did tell her I wouldn’t know when, where, and how to tell her. It might help to say that I’m a shy guy so that does not help me in telling her, but I fear that If I don't tell her that someday some other guy will. What should I do should I tell her, should I not, and if I do how, and when would I do that? I’ve read posts here that people told their cousin and made it work and that gave me hope but at the same time some did not work and that took away some hope. Please help with some advice I don’t know what to do.

Edited by AlexFrost

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LadyC    98

maybe you could start with something like 'if we weren't cousins, i think i'd kiss you' or 'like "hey, weird thing, i read that the catholic encyclopedia says that joseph and mary were cousins!' (or that benjamin bunny and flopsy were cousins... it says so on the first page of the beloved children's classic by beatrix potter) and see where the conversation leads ya. or rent a movie like mansfield park, a classic and fun romance between cousins by jane austen. or something a little more tragic, like how i live now. it's a beautiful but very sad wwII era love story between first cousins.

keep in mind that 2nd cousins are not prohibited from even marrying, anywhere in the world. there is no reason to fear anything other than fear itself. 

 

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pooch    17

Is she the first girl you ever liked?

Here's my suggestion in addition to LadyC's: Just go for the kiss. Just kiss her. Boom. If she slaps your face, then that's that. If she does not, it will be fireworks. Go hard or go home, my friend. :D I believe it's better that way. ;)

Make sure though that you know her feelings and the situation. Try to read her mood as well when you do it. If the situation is right and the timing is right, kissing her first in the cheek then on the lips will catapult you big time. :)

Don't worry if she removes her face from you when you will be attempting to kiss her. Don't apologize either. But don't force things either. Just try to be cool and try again next time if that happens. Coz you know what? This is so true

18 hours ago, AlexFrost said:

It might help to say that I’m a shy guy so that does not help me in telling her, but I fear that If I don't tell her that someday some other guy will.

You can't miss the opportunity, since she is 18 already and you are 19. If both of you guys are 13 and 14, in high school with no jobs and stuff, my answer would be different. But I presume that both of you are in college, and probably have part-time work one way or the other and are onto their career paths smoothly. If this is the case, then my take would be go hard or go home. :D

 

Pooch

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