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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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Guest HeavyHeart

How do you find out if he feels the same way?!

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Guest HeavyHeart

I am a 30 year old woman, he is my 31 year old cousin. Old enough to know what you want in a partner, I'd like to think? He comes from a family of 7 (all boys) and being so close in age, we always tended to spend a great deal of time together. 

He's just had an accidental child with a girl he rebounded with too quickly after a failed marriage, the little boy is amazing! He loves his son to pieces, but not so much the gal. He seems unhappy. Unfullfilled in life, and holding on with SO much to give. He's smart, he's sensitve, responsible, creative, masculine, beautiful.. all the things. (*for instance: he taught me how to use the table saw in his garage, and then put all the scrap peices together in a super weird 'trophy' sanded, varnished, signed and dated, then presented it (sheepishly, I might add) for my birthday gift. Is this not love?!) 

We talk through the holy crapoly! life throws at you. I'm an ear he can bend anytime, and we rarely disagree on things. Our converstaions always in-depth and emotional, I see a side to him I don't think he lets others see. BUT, I wonder if i'm kidding myself.

Maybe these feelings I have are one sided. Maybe his heartbeat doesn't quicken when he sits near me, maybe he doesn't have these feelings of frustration when considering a life without me in it. 

For me, I feel invigorated at the thought of seeing him. I can't imagine a better man to spend my life with. No one (and i've seen much of the world and people in it) can stack up to the one man i've been secretly pining over since we were children. 



How do I know if he feels it too?

How do I ask without ruining a potential friendship, if thats all he sees me as?


I should mention too, our family is CLOSE. Every holiday, birthday, new birth, passing through town.. you name it, we celebrate it. And I know, there would be shame in admitting to being kissing cousins. Even if his feelings were to match my own, how do I let him know "hey, if you're not weird, i'm not weird"....

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i'm bumping this up for you. i've got insomnia so i'm awake, but i'm about to pull my salsa out of the canner and then go to bed. but i noticed it hadn't been responded to yet since i approved it, and figured it might need a little nudge.

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Oh wow... 

This is a very good thread. :)

First of all, Guestheavy heart, you may want to register to the forum so that you can see more of its priveleges and whatnot. But if you don't want to, that's okay either way...

Let me ask you one question first before I respond in length:

It is quite clear that you love with him, huh? :)


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