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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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Guest Casey

Is My Cousin Interested? (Am I?)

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Guest Casey

Before I go into the details, allow me to give you some backstory. I'm 15 years old, and I have three first cousins. two of which are female, and are sisters, and one is male, and is an only child like I am. Every weekend, on both Saturdays and Sundays, these cousins visit my house. (Or to be more specific, our grandparents' house.) 

The particular cousin I'm concerned about is the oldest among all of us, age 16 and female. I'll call her Jana. Jana is a person who is very needy and gets attached to people very easily, and as of late has gotten a lot closer to me.

She had been giving me more hugs and occasionally cuddling with me, which at first I thought was odd, but I'd assumed nothing of it. 

However, this weekend, our grandparents went to a party with their family, and my male cousin was very stubborn and upset with us, and he stayed home instead of coming over for the past two weeks. That left me, my two female cousins, and their father.

My other female cousin, who I'll name Sara, was lifeguarding at a pool until 7pm. Before 7pm, when my uncle and Jana were over, nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

However, Jana was upset because her abusive mother (who my uncle has separated from) called her ugly, stupid, etc. Essentially, I had done my best to cheer her up and told her what she needed to hear. (Stop blaming yourself, your mother is irresponsible, those words were uncalled for, etc.) She didn't say it, but I could see in her eyes that she felt much better.

Later, we came at 7pm to pick up Sara, and we decided to go to our local Wegmans to rent a movie out of redbox and picked a movie. Later that evening, Sara and my uncle were sound asleep while Jana and I were still awake, watching the movie.

While watching the movie, I suddenly felt a warm hand touch mine. It was Jana, looking at me with a pout on her face. Never before have we held hands together, so this was very sudden and new to me. 

Regardless, I let her hold my hand and assumed it was another innocent, playful sign of affection. However, she eventually became a little affectionate. She eventually started to rub the back of my hand with her thumb, and started pulling me closer to her. (We were laying on the floor with pillows and blankets.) Eventually she started to bring my hand inside her blanket, close to her hip area. I quickly got the feeling that she was hoping to put my hand on a sensitive, and most womanly part of her body. However, she stopped when she noticed my uncle starting to wake up. She let go of my hand, and we both retracted our hands under our own blankets.

She did the same thing as before, on and off as my uncle went out to the kitchen to get a drink and find something to eat. At that point, I was very suspicious. However, that didn't compare to what happened on Sunday. 

On Sunday, when Jana arrived with my uncle (without Sara, because she was lifeguarding as usual,) I was up in my room. The rest of the family was outside, except for Jana. When she came into my room, she said a bubbly hello, but then quickly made a sad expression as she ran to me and hugged me.

You may recall that I said we hugged all the time, and this should be no exception. However, this hug was different. After 10 seconds of hugging, which is usually when we stop, she stayed hugging me, tighter than usual. I felt her hands exploring my back, rubbing up and down, getting close to my hips. She also buried her face into my neck, and rubbed my neck lightly with her face. I was still, shocked by these new advances. Not to mention that we had help the hug for at least 2 minutes. My raging erection that I was hiding by keeping our hips apart was incredibly uncomfortable, so I then had to pry myself away from her, and asked her if something was wrong.

She looked deep into my eyes. After a few seconds of silence, she asks, "I have something to tell you, but you have to keep it a secret, okay?" I agreed, and she told me that her boyfriend cheated on her. I was utterly confused, as she never told anyone she had one. She always said that she hates dating and that it was a waste of time. Apparently, she was dating someone secretively for two months, and hadn't told anyone. Not her mother, father, or her closest friends.

She said that what I'd told her before about her mom made her feel better, as the same things I'd said were also applicable to the incident with her boyfriend, which was what she was truly concerned about.

I thought in my head, "This 'boyfriend cheating' thing is such a cliche plot for porn, and I'm concerned." In order to clear the air and test my theory, I asked if there was anything I could do to help. 

I then quickly realized that I was still incredibly hard. I knew then that I secretly wanted her to have sex with me. Thankfully, she shrugged and said "I don't know." I took this opportunity to clear my head of these thoughts, and suggested that we should go outside and talk to the family to take her mind off of it. She said "Okay," but then quickly hugged me again. Same wandering hands, same head being buried into my neck. However, I also started to move my hands, but only around her upper back. 

She then pulled my hips to hers, my erection lightly pressing into her. I quickly opened the gap again. After another few seconds, she looks into my eyes and says "I love you." And places her head back on my neck. I almost felt a light kiss. I pretended not to notice it. She then gazed at me again, and kissed my neck again. She then moves up to my face and kisses me on the cheek. She then breaks the hug, and we go back downstairs and outside to talk with our family. 

Anyway, that's about it in terms of what happened this weekend. I'm still not 100% sure if she likes me in a romantic/sexual way, as I could  easily be misinterpreting these gestures. Hell, I don't know what I even think.

--

Long story short/TL;DR - Hand holding in secret as if it's meant to be kept from our famil. Kissing on the neck and cheek. Hands moving near my hips during hugs. I don't know if I should consider an incestuous relationship with my cousin. 

After she left, I immediately started researching cousin marriage, which is legal in New York State (where I live) and I also researched the risks of having sex with your cousin in terms of children. The 6% risk of birth defects were surprisingly low, and I can honestly say that I don't even mind the idea of incest.

So what do you think? Does my cousin have an interest in me? Should I go for it? (I probably know what you guys will say to the latter question, as all of the users ARE incestuous.)

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Well that was very long! LOL

Anyway, it's not "incestuous" - that word has a legal definition and in this case it does not apply.

So now the "dad" side of me is like, "you're all too young for that (true story and I'll let others fill in why, especially for cousins and the problems that presents when it goes south for teens - take it slow)" and also, I'm not even sure I want to know how you would know anything about the plot of movies you're far to young to even know exist 😂

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From your story it seems to me that your cousin is insecure and trying to use you to build up her self esteem. The two of you are pretty young so I would advise cooling your jets. I would give this advise to any teenage couple that was looking to jump into sex but when the other person happens to be your cousin you have a lot more to think about, you can't break up with family and although you are not currently dating I still think the same applies to fling relationships. If you're thinking of actually starting a relationship then you should concentrate on building your friendship, also if Hawk doesn't chime in you should look for his trusty speech he gives for all our young members, it's great advise. Best of luck 😁

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Guest Casey
1 hour ago, ColoradoMarried said:

Well that was very long! LOL

Anyway, it's not "incestuous" - that word has a legal definition and in this case it does not apply.

So now the "dad" side of me is like, "you're all too young for that (true story and I'll let others fill in why, especially for cousins and the problems that presents when it goes south for teens - take it slow)" and also, I'm not even sure I want to know how you would know anything about the plot of movies you're far to young to even know exist 😂

The reason I know porn exists is because of the internet.. You'd be surprised at how many teens watch it. It's insanity. Also, thank you for correcting me on the legal terminology. 

Addressing me being too young, I completely agree. I don't think I should engage, but hormones say "Ahh, what the hell, who cares?" 

-- By the way, I've seen topics on here that were created by 12 year olds.. I'm surprised that 15 is considered young here, although in most circumstances it would make perfect sense, haha.

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Guest Casey
13 minutes ago, quarter25 said:

From your story it seems to me that your cousin is insecure and trying to use you to build up her self esteem. The two of you are pretty young so I would advise cooling your jets. I would give this advise to any teenage couple that was looking to jump into sex but when the other person happens to be your cousin you have a lot more to think about, you can't break up with family and although you are not currently dating I still think the same applies to fling relationships. If you're thinking of actually starting a relationship then you should concentrate on building your friendship, also if Hawk doesn't chime in you should look for his trusty speech he gives for all our young members, it's great advise. Best of luck 😁

I have that feeling, too. She's one of the most insecure people I've ever met. 

"Cooling your jets." Haha, do you know how a 15-year-old works? It's not the easiest thing to control, haha. Although I agree with the sentiment that I shouldn't go fast at all in making this decision. 

--P.S, who the hell is Hawk? 

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Not saying that nothing could ever come of the two of you but messing around because she's trying to fill an emotional void doesn't make for the best start to any relationship. Building a connection ensures that you'll have a lasting friendship even if nothing romantic stems from that, a relationship with your cousin can be a lot more intense and most times has many obstacles and stressers that are probably better handled with age.

Of course I do lol but unless you would like to end up with a child in your teens, which from experience isn't ideal then it's best to use some self control, it's not impossible 😜

Hawk is a long-time member and Mod here, he has an excellent bit of advice tailored for our young members and if he happens on to this post or if you can find it yourself you'll be happy you did 😁

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hawk is a very wise person.

12 is also too young!

ahhh, those nasty hormones. they always interfere with common sense! and haha, of COURSE we know how a 15 year old works! LOL what cracks me up is how 15 year olds (and 25 year olds) always think that us old fogies don't know a darn thing about ______ (fill in the blank with nearly any topic you can think of). dude! we know! we know because we've survived it! and our children have survived it! and in some cases our grandchildren have survived it... although my grandchildren haven't started through that quite yet. one of them will in a year or two though! 

we also know that kids don't listen to us old farts. it's some crazy human nature that makes us all think that our own generation is the one to invent (or re-invent) the wheel. or to be more on target, to invent sex. LOL yeah, crazy, huh? that's ok, we thought the same thing about our parents generation. when i was your age, my parents were stupid and couldn't possibly understand diddly squat.

here's a funny for ya. just because i'm in that kind of mood tonight. my oldest daughter was sneaking out her window and having sex at the age of 13. she eventually grew up and married him (it lasted almost a year before she divorced him). recently i ran into him. he has a 14 year old daughter who is becoming a little boy crazy. this guy was telling me how he wants to stand guard with a shotgun, because she's way too young for that. and my response was....

"SAYS THE GUY...."

and then he got embarrassed and ducked his head and said oh yeah. i was that guy, wasn't i?

YUP.

moral of the story is that we all grow up and suddenly realize just how stupid we were when we were our kids age... and how right our parents were. :)

i don't really have any advice tonight. it's late. my husband (who is my first cousin once removed) has already gone to sleep. i should go lay down next to him and play with games on my cell phone. why did i stay up again? oh yeah, because he's the old fart that has to get up before dawn to go to work, and i'm the old fart that gets to sleep in until my grandsons wake up and start bouncing off the walls. 

everybody's working for the weekend.... (look it up on youtube. good song.)

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Guest Casey
7 hours ago, LadyC said:

hawk is a very wise person.

12 is also too young!

ahhh, those nasty hormones. they always interfere with common sense! and haha, of COURSE we know how a 15 year old works! LOL what cracks me up is how 15 year olds (and 25 year olds) always think that us old fogies don't know a darn thing about ______ (fill in the blank with nearly any topic you can think of). dude! we know! we know because we've survived it! and our children have survived it! and in some cases our grandchildren have survived it... although my grandchildren haven't started through that quite yet. one of them will in a year or two though! 

we also know that kids don't listen to us old farts. it's some crazy human nature that makes us all think that our own generation is the one to invent (or re-invent) the wheel. or to be more on target, to invent sex. LOL yeah, crazy, huh? that's ok, we thought the same thing about our parents generation. when i was your age, my parents were stupid and couldn't possibly understand diddly squat.

here's a funny for ya. just because i'm in that kind of mood tonight. my oldest daughter was sneaking out her window and having sex at the age of 13. she eventually grew up and married him (it lasted almost a year before she divorced him). recently i ran into him. he has a 14 year old daughter who is becoming a little boy crazy. this guy was telling me how he wants to stand guard with a shotgun, because she's way too young for that. and my response was....

"SAYS THE GUY...."

and then he got embarrassed and ducked his head and said oh yeah. i was that guy, wasn't i?

YUP.

moral of the story is that we all grow up and suddenly realize just how stupid we were when we were our kids age... and how right our parents were. :)

i don't really have any advice tonight. it's late. my husband (who is my first cousin once removed) has already gone to sleep. i should go lay down next to him and play with games on my cell phone. why did i stay up again? oh yeah, because he's the old fart that has to get up before dawn to go to work, and i'm the old fart that gets to sleep in until my grandsons wake up and start bouncing off the walls. 

everybody's working for the weekend.... (look it up on youtube. good song.)

That was quite a tangent you went on, haha. You were strawmanning this thing for a majority of that.. I never said anything about older generations not being able to give advice to younger ones. In fact, I'm perfectly happy that another 15 year old isn't agreeing with me and pressuring me to do it. 

That being said, you aren't exactly being helpful, because you were being condescending and just talked about being the older generation and how wrong I am. This hardly addresses my problem at all. The only thing you said that was remotely on topic was "Those damn hormones!"

I was hoping that people would get more out of the huge arse story I took the time to write than a simple "Wow, hormones, amirite?"

I was also hoping that you could address whether my cousin is interested in the first place, should I consider the relationship, and what are the major issues that I should know about that most people don't?

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Guest Casey
7 hours ago, quarter25 said:

Not saying that nothing could ever come of the two of you but messing around because she's trying to fill an emotional void doesn't make for the best start to any relationship. Building a connection ensures that you'll have a lasting friendship even if nothing romantic stems from that, a relationship with your cousin can be a lot more intense and most times has many obstacles and stressers that are probably better handled with age.

Of course I do lol but unless you would like to end up with a child in your teens, which from experience isn't ideal then it's best to use some self control, it's not impossible 😜

Hawk is a long-time member and Mod here, he has an excellent bit of advice tailored for our young members and if he happens on to this post or if you can find it yourself you'll be happy you did 😁

I agree that the way this "relationship" is starting isn't the greatest. She did say later in the day that  "If you're going through anything, tell me," so at least she isn't invested entirely for herself.

Also, I understand that there are many issues to be handled with age. This applies to all relationships, especially this kind. Hell, I don't even think my cousin knows what she truly wants. I feel like assuming anything after she's broken up with her boyfriend is horrible. But for some reason I can't shake the feeling that something is going on. 

Also, I certainly hope that Hawk will comment. He seems like the person I need to talk to most.

 

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That's cute. To say LadyC was "strawmanning" is to assume she was arguing in the first place; she was not.

No one can possibly tell you what another person may or may not feel for you except that person but given your story, I'd say she does quite fancy you in at least one way. Having been 15 for about a year of my life (though admittedly many years ago), I'll just reiterate what every other person of age and relative wisdom has- yeah, it's hormones as the greatest driver. Whether not you agree with that is irrelevant; the tendency of the age is to disagree with that. It's a lot harder to understand the situation you're smack inside of.

Finally, to the point of problems you may or may not be seeing, I'll grant this: relationships of our youth tend to be very rocky and short-lived. They feel like blessed eternity while we're going through them but then end rather suddenly. Its just the reality of "teen romance", or what my grandmother called "puppy love". With that in mind and fully understanding that relationships tend to go sexual a lot faster now than, say, 30 years ago, understand that such a relationship going south with a cousin in your teens can forever change your family dynamic.  Even if everything is kittens and roses, at 15 (and 16 and 17) your parents and her parents get a veto vote on everything you do, including dating. If any find out and disagree (and at least one is bound to), all hell can break loose in the family, creating drama that lasts years and spreads into places where uncles and aunts and cousins you didn't even know exist will come out from under the woodwork just to tell you (and her) how wrong you are and often using most colorful language to do so. Just a heads up that you may want to prepare for.

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Oh my goodness. I wasn't on a tangent, and I wasn't strawmanning anything. Where is your sense of humor? I was just responding in that silly kind of way that you do when you get overtired. It was late. I think I even said in my post that I wasn't really trying to be helpful in that one. Nor was I being condescending to you. I was just being silly. And no you didn't say anything about us old farts. I was stereotyping US! If I was being condescending at all, it was towards MY generation, because I was being... You got it... Silly. try not to be so sensitive! 

Oh, and I didn't say damn hormones. I said nasty hormones. Not that I've never said a cuss word, I just try to set a decent example by keeping my language clean most of the time.

Gosh didn't you even get a kick out of the story I told you about my daughters ex-boyfriend? I thought that would at least get a chuckle. 😕

For the record, here's one thing I got out of what you wrote. You're a talented and gifted writer. Not saying that you're writing fiction, so don't get your knickers in a knot. I'm just saying you have a very good way with words. Most 15 year olds that come here can't spell a word or form a complete sentence because all they know is text shorthand.

You have received a lot of good advice from some very wise people. I'm sorry that you couldn't see the humor in what I wrote last night. I wasn't in an advice giving kind of mood. Still not. It's rare, even if there is no way you could know that, so I'll just say goodbye and see myself out of your thread. 💃

 

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Guest Casey
34 minutes ago, ColoradoMarried said:

That's cute. To say LadyC was "strawmanning" is to assume she was arguing in the first place; she was not.

No one can possibly tell you what another person may or may not feel for you except that person but given your story, I'd say she does quite fancy you in at least one way. Having been 15 for about a year of my life (though admittedly many years ago), I'll just reiterate what every other person of age and relative wisdom has- yeah, it's hormones as the greatest driver. Whether not you agree with that is irrelevant; the tendency of the age is to disagree with that. It's a lot harder to understand the situation you're smack inside of.

Finally, to the point of problems you may or may not be seeing, I'll grant this: relationships of our youth tend to be very rocky and short-lived. They feel like blessed eternity while we're going through them but then end rather suddenly. Its just the reality of "teen romance", or what my grandmother called "puppy love". With that in mind and fully understanding that relationships tend to go sexual a lot faster now than, say, 30 years ago, understand that such a relationship going south with a cousin in your teens can forever change your family dynamic.  Even if everything is kittens and roses, at 15 (and 16 and 17) your parents and her parents get a veto vote on everything you do, including dating. If any find out and disagree (and at least one is bound to), all hell can break loose in the family, creating drama that lasts years and spreads into places where uncles and aunts and cousins you didn't even know exist will come out from under the woodwork just to tell you (and her) how wrong you are and often using most colorful language to do so. Just a heads up that you may want to prepare for.

To be quite frank, the tone she had was fairly argumentative in my eyes, same with yours. I agree on the front that this is primarily hormonal, as I've said before. You're also assuming things about me and stereotyping all 15 year olds, much like LadyC.

Also, thank you for giving me information to work with. I'm well aware that many people will oppose us, as even too much hugging has been judged and commented on by everyone. That alone is a bit ridiculous. 

Regardless of whether she loves me or not, I definitely think I should put a close to this. Nothing is worth it if we'll get backlash like this. Thank you for the insight.

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Guest Casey
33 minutes ago, LadyC said:

Oh my goodness. I wasn't on a tangent, and I wasn't strawmanning anything. Where is your sense of humor? I was just responding in that silly kind of way that you do when you get overtired. It was late. I think I even said in my post that I wasn't really trying to be helpful in that one. Nor was I being condescending to you. I was just being silly. And no you didn't say anything about us old farts. I was stereotyping US! If I was being condescending at all, it was towards MY generation, because I was being... You got it... Silly. try not to be so sensitive! 

Oh, and I didn't say damn hormones. I said nasty hormones. Not that I've never said a cuss word, I just try to set a decent example by keeping my language clean most of the time.

Gosh didn't you even get a kick out of the story I told you about my daughters ex-boyfriend? I thought that would at least get a chuckle. 😕

For the record, here's one thing I got out of what you wrote. You're a talented and gifted writer. Not saying that you're writing fiction, so don't get your knickers in a knot. I'm just saying you have a very good way with words. Most 15 year olds that come here can't spell a word or form a complete sentence because all they know is text shorthand.

You have received a lot of good advice from some very wise people. I'm sorry that you couldn't see the humor in what I wrote last night. I wasn't in an advice giving kind of mood. Still not. It's rare, even if there is no way you could know that, so I'll just say goodbye and see myself out of your thread. 💃

 

Well, I match your sentiments that you should leave the thread. If you don't want to give advice, don't answer a thread asking for advice. I'm not interested in humor at the moment because this is a serious issue that I want serious answers to. Nothing more or less. 

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ok now you're being plain disrespectful. you may not get my sense of humor, but i'm still an admin here. try and remember that before you get snotty with me again. i might just dance my way back into your thread and throw a ballet shoe at your head. the kind with the pointe in the toe. for crying out loud you can't even take the compliment that i gave you. so if you want to know how i really feel, yes, your writing was very well done. so well done that my first thought was that you plagiarized it and my second thought was that you were writing it in a manner that was intentionally WAY too provocative to see what kind of response you would get. i can live with that. i'd rather see someone write very well and stop just before getting graphic in detail, but you were toeing the line when you start writing stuff like this:

Quote

She then pulled my hips to hers, my erection lightly pressing into her. I quickly opened the gap again. After another few seconds, she looks into my eyes and says "I love you." 

if you're trying to get experience writing literotica, this is not the place for it. seriously, are you looking for advice, or for an audience? 

you want helpful advice? here's your helpful advice. mind your manners. you want us to take you seriously? quit acting like a petulant child when somebody doesn't bend over backwards into your melodrama. and quit patronizing those whose advice you do accept. because you are, ya know. you've agreed with and tried to sound more mature than your years with everybody who gave you a "sincere" response. because what that really makes you sound like is a freaking troll.

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2 hours ago, Guest Casey said:

Well, I match your sentiments that you should leave the thread. If you don't want to give advice, don't answer a thread asking for advice. I'm not interested in humor at the moment because this is a serious issue that I want serious answers to. Nothing more or less. 

I get that this is rough right now but the two people you are being snippy with are administrators. Lady C has been married to her 1c1r for I believe longer than you've been alive, same with Colorado married, though I believe he's married to his first cousin. Humor can be helpful to some by taking their mind off the situation for a bit, she was being playful not rude 😟  All that being said, this is a vast group, you may very well get advise you really don't like or possibly people who just jump in with out addressing what you've wrote at all, try not to get to worked up about it. 

Not pursuing anything right now is probably the best bet in my opinion. As Colorado said and I pointed out in two of my responses, this isn't just any relationship. I started mine with my cousin when I was 24 and though I didn't get much "backlash" I still got ear fulls of people thinking they knew what's best for my life, which again like Colorado said is a lot harder to deal with when you're a teen. Hope you guys will still be great friends and who knows maybe some day something may happen.

Edited by quarter25
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Guest Casey
1 hour ago, LadyC said:

ok now you're being plain disrespectful. you may not get my sense of humor, but i'm still an admin here. try and remember that before you get snotty with me again. i might just dance my way back into your thread and throw a ballet shoe at your head. the kind with the pointe in the toe. for crying out loud you can't even take the compliment that i gave you. so if you want to know how i really feel, yes, your writing was very well done. so well done that my first thought was that you plagiarized it and my second thought was that you were writing it in a manner that was intentionally WAY too provocative to see what kind of response you would get. i can live with that. i'd rather see someone write very well and stop just before getting graphic in detail, but you were toeing the line when you start writing stuff like this:

if you're trying to get experience writing literotica, this is not the place for it. seriously, are you looking for advice, or for an audience? 

you want helpful advice? here's your helpful advice. mind your manners. you want us to take you seriously? quit acting like a petulant child when somebody doesn't bend over backwards into your melodrama. and quit patronizing those whose advice you do accept. because you are, ya know. you've agreed with and tried to sound more mature than your years with everybody who gave you a "sincere" response. because what that really makes you sound like is a freaking troll.

Honestly I don't care anymore. I've made up my mind to say no. I've got other holy crapoly! to deal with right now and I have no time for your condescending attitude. Maybe just respect that I'm not interested in humor right now for multiple reasons that are unrelated, and all people have bad days. 

Also, the reason why I included what I said in your quoted passage was because it was apart of what happened, and one of the most concerning parts about the whole situation. You call me a child, but you're being a bit childish yourself. At the mentions of an erection, you gasp and lose your mind as if I just confessed to murder. These are events that actually happened, less than a week ago, in fact. If you're going to dismiss all of this as melodrama, I have nothing to say to you.

I responded sincerely to those who gave a serious response because they actually listened to me and gave me actual advice! All I asked for was if my cousin had any romantic interest, and if I should pursue/consider a relationship with her, and why. I've gotten a helpful answer from a user already, I've decided not to pursue, and your reply is no longer needed. Goodbye.

--

P.S, threatening to throw a shoe at me and calling me childish/immature is mildly hypocritical. 

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Somebody rang?

 Young Casey,

 Since my lamp was rubbed, I'll pop in. I'll not be "snippy", and I'll try to stay focused, and not go off on a tangent. I generally DO get windy, and tangents abound, but, I'll try to focus, even though I have a LOT going on IRL.

 Ok. Here goes.

 If you'll notice my profile, I'm the resident junk yard dog. I have that moniker for several reasons. Mostly because I lay around quietly, but bite when I feel like it. And, I really have no qualms left. I'm an equal opportunity biter, and swing a mean banhammer. But, relax, you're not there. Yet. I will agree that you write well for your age. Reminds me of the cat in the mirror when I was your age, what I remember of those days. I hope this isn't too much of a tangent, but, you asked who the hell I am, and now you know.

 Now, to the mention of my "good advice", especially to younger members. I like to say I'm not so good at telling people what to do, but, at my age, I CAN assure you, I'm getting pretty damn good at what NOT to do. In my current predicament, I would advise you to NEVER get in ANY kind of relationship. EVER. MGTOW, and all of that. But, that's not why you're here, and, I doubt you'd listen till your my age and have your own PhD in Hard Knocks. So, with that in mind, let's delve, shall we? 

 I certainly don't want to put anyone down, (and the girls may pummel me, won't be the first time) but, from your adequate description in your OP, your cuz seems to be at the very least possibly the "clingy" type. Nothing wrong with that, and totally to be expected at your ages. And, as you rightly note, at your ages, the hormones are a raging. Nothing wrong with that, and also totally expected. How the two of you deal with it at this point WILL have long term consequences. That has been noted, and fact. If family should find out at this stage that there are shenanigans, you two WILL be separated and watched like hawks. (no pun intended) That, even IF they would be more or less fine with it, in say another 5 to 10 years. Am I so old and fuddy duddy to think there WON'T be repeat performances, and they will probably go further? No. I AM a realist, and know where these things lead once they've started, without extreme caution and aforethought. That's what I'll try to impress upon you. You seem bright enough to do the things you need to do (and NOT do) at this point, so, I'll try to spout a few protips for you.

 1) Focus on school. Get, or keep the grades up. If you have any inkling this is something you may wish to pursue, you're going to have to be smart, and get smarter. You did well by at the very first here, ending up here, and getting the facts. The facts are the facts, and won't change regardless of others' opinions of them.

 2) Put this all on hold. You've mentioned you're going to put a close to it, and, you can certainly do that too. But, don't do it because it's "incest". It isn't, at least historically. Legally, in some places, yes. That doesn't make it so either, it just means laws have been passed without much thought. Not at all unusual either, happens every day. But, for the time being, think clearly, and TRY to get her to do the same. Let her know that nobody knows what the future holds, but, it there's going to be a chance of a future together, it can't be sabotaged now. 

 3) Focus on building the friendship. Get to know her intimately other than physically intimately. You two may find that you aren't as compatible as you may think now. Or, you may come to realize you ARE extremely compatible. These things are things to know BEFORE stepping off in the deep end and over your heads. In a few years (which will seem to DRAG ON AND ON) you will have a much better idea if this is somewhere you want to go. I always recommend being 20 years old at the least, and my personal preference is 22ish. Again, from personal experience I don't have time or space to go into here in this reply. As you can see, it's already getting windy. LOL 

 4) IF, in the future, situations arise (no erection pun intended, although that DOES go with it) and it's something you want to do, and BOTH of you are on the same page, then go for it, and don't let ANYBODY talk you out of it. Even yourself.........

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Casey.

I totally agree with Hawk - as I always do.  LOL

I  recommend a book frequently.  It is called NASTY PEOPLE: HOW TO STOP BEING HURT BY THEM WITHOUT STOOPING TO THEIR LEVEL by Dr. Jay Carter.  It is less than 70 pages .  It teaches you how to deal with bullies in a positive way.

You can get it from a library or down load it from Amazon.

I may be a bit older but I refuse to grow up because grownups turn into fuddyduddies!

HUGS

Nat

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for the record, i didn't gasp at all about the mention of an erection. it was the eloquent wording of the passage that led me to think it was either plagiarized or an intro to your erotic novel. 

i hope you've gotten the advice you sought. it's the last you will be getting in these forums. you see, i have no tolerance for your attitude either. it's trollish. here, i'll show you to the door. 

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