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vince9760

Girl cousin has me wondering...

Question

So, here's the deal. I'm 22 & my girl cousin is 25 I believe. I've had a crush on this girl for a long time now. Only until we both gotten older that I started to notice she MIGHT like me as well but I'm not quite sure how to approach this. Also, we aren't so close to each other. Even though we see each other more than often. It's more of a small talk type thing with us.

the very first moment I noticed she's into me was SUPER random. I was getting home one night around 11pm I'd say it was. I had just got out the shower & was preparing to eat my chocolate chip cookies I bought from Subway. While they warmed up in the microwave, out of nowhere here comes my sexy arse cousin & this other girl (sisters friend, she's sexy as well. Lol) coming in the kitchen. I thought nothing of that at first but then they both grabbed my arms & basically told me to choose one of them. (They were either very buzzed or drunk. Some family of mine were out in the backyard having a good time.) In that moment I seriously wanted to choose my cousin but I noticed my cousins mom looking into the kitchen so I had to settle with the other girl. Turns out my cousin got jealous (I think) & threw my cookies into the hot pot of soup!! (Why else would she do that??)

Second time was actually BEFORE the first event took place. She told me she was leaving & to close the frontdoor for her. She was wearing a tight green sundress & oh my goodness did she look scrumptious. I couldn't help myself but to slap her butt as she walked out my door. She turned around & said to me "omg! Hahahaha". She said it in that tone when girls pretend to not like something but you know they really do. ;) 

Third. Sometimes when we walk by each other in the hallway of my house. I touch her thighs. Whether it'd be a quick touch or a long touch. She doesn't seem bothered by it. & on those rare moments when we hug I place my hands on her lower back close to touching her butt but not quite & she doesn't seem bothered by that either.

Fourth. She tends to stand in my sight of view whenever she's in the kitchen. My room is right by the kitchen & can see a little over there when the door is open. & it's always this one particular spot she stands at whenever my door is open so I don't that's just coincidence that she's standing there every time.

Fifth. She got my number somehow one night & told me to open the back door for her cus I had just finished locking the house. I didn't bother asking how she got it, though. From my sister most likely but who knows for sure.

Sixth. I can tell her feelings for me get revealed when she's been drinking. The way she looks at me & the way she speaks to the other females that are talking to me. She's always telling them "quit bothering him. You're probably annoying him." Then proceeds to give me a smile.

Does anyone think it would be random to start texting her even though we don't talk like that at all?? I've been contemplating this situation for quite some time now & would like some advice!

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I belong to those that they don't demonise cousin relationships but at the same time don't encourage other people to be engaged is such relationships, simply because such relations are not for all of us. The most important thing for me is to love and be loved. Being in a relationship with a first cousin shouldn't cause the dramas we all know (in most western societies) but shouldn't be something treated lightheartedly. So, my advice is… wait! Wait to see if your attraction is deep and sentimental, or just a fling or a physical one. There are plenty of girls out there for the latter. If you realise that this girl is something more than important in your life, speak to her like a real man, face to face, by exposing directly and clearly your feelings for her. If you think that this could be a big leap for which you are not ready yet, then just wait and see how she reacts when she receives from you signs of love, gradually. And am talking about man love, not cousin love.

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