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Intro and thanks for this site

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Hi from Texas, hence my user name.  I'm well into my 50 somethings and I've harbored a secret crush for my 1st cousin for 40 years.  We've only had a facebook presence where we liked things the other posted, happy birthdays and stuff.  We talked about having a cousin reunion (she has sisters), but we are several states apart and life always just got in the way.  My uncomfortable crush held me back too.  This past week, Denise (fake name), was in Texas on business and wanted to meet for lunch.  She was over 6 hours away and not staying the night since she had to be back at work the next day.  My crush feelings went into overdrive!  I began reading about cousin relationships and stumbled on this site.  I learned my feelings are normal, and we don't chose to have them, but like all romantic interests they may not be reciprocated.  Better yet, they are often wonderful, lasting relationships.

Trying to make a long story short, we met for lunch and talked for two hours with huge smiles, lots of hugs, selfies, hand touching, and well I did a couple of cheek kisses.  I couldn't believe I was brave enough to do that lol.  Come to find out, we both have had multiple failed marriages, like a lot of the same things, and generally had a blast.  That night I tossed and turned unable to sleep because I kept thinking how to tell Denise my feelings.  I finally gave up and wrote a pretty bold IM telling her I had to let her know I've had a crush on her for as long as I could remember.  I enjoyed her company greatly, and I did not want to lose our connection for another 40 years.  I was typing and editing some other stuff and then hit send be accident!  I wasn't completely ready to do it yet.  I quickly apologized and said it was just something I needed to put out there because it was really keeping me awake.  Her response has kept me smiling all day.  She said don't be embarrassed, that was a very sweet thing you said, and I've always liked me too.  Why do you think I drove 6 hours for a two hour lunch? 

That was my big day!  I wish I could read her mind.  Maybe she wishes she could read mine?  I'm looking forward to my cousin reunion and a chance to explore my feelings with my favorite cousin.  I wouldn't have had to nerve to take this baby step without this website.  Thank you.

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