By A.R Wright
This is a continuation of an incredibly long story that I told back in 2017. I entitled it had to get it off my chest nowhere else to turn. From that point I got a lot of great advice but things have taken a bit of a strange turn. A brief background my cousin and I have known each other our entire lives. I've been in love with him since I was small and after being out of touch for quite some time we reconnected about 5 years ago at my great uncle's birthday. Things went okay from there we stayed in touch texted and I even went on a date of sorts with him. I went out to the suburbs where he lives and we shared a coffee. Without going off the rails and writing down my life story we are seeing each other again this Christmas. I haven't seen him for two years now. for the first year after I saw him at Christmas two years ago things were fairly normal in the sense that we would text back and forth and even though he was more stoic than he used to be he seems like he genuinely cared. At this point it has been 4 months since we have had any contact. I have no idea what's going on in his life anymore and I'm feeling a little sad that we have lost touch. Unfortunately I'm still deeply in love with him. Is there any purpose in telling him? Getting straight to the point how do I tell him or should I just keep it to myself now. When we saw each other two years ago he was very flirtatious and allowed me to touch him stroke his hair and when we went on our one and only date before he left he looked at me as if he was going to kiss me and left. Sometimes I tend to read into things but our history that we have together suggests otherwise. I don't really know what to do. Should I tell him? Or would this just make the shattered remains of our relationship even worse. I don't want to make things worse between him but I've been holding this weight on my chest for very very long time.
Thank you for all of your help.
I wanna at least try to start some kind of romantic relationship with my second cousin. I don't want to waste my life without ever actually trying at least once. I've known her since I was young and we've been attracted to each other since we first met. Something broke in me when I found out we were related. It lead me toward a long path of depression because I knew the chances of us being together were almost nonexistent, and it's only gotten worse with time. She feels the same or at least she's told me so numerous times. The problem is I think she's too scared to try. Maybe misinformed on the matter of cousin relationships and their genetic closeness as well. This is a delicate matter that could lead to either good things or horrible things. I'm having trouble figuring out how to talk to her and make her come around if she can. And if not, well at least I'll know for sure that I was doomed from the start. It will hurt like nothing else ever has but at least I tried.
Don't have the money or insurance for counseling. Like was the last suggestion in my other post. Wish I did though. I'm ready to complain to someone for a change.
Hello , I'm here of course because i have feelings for my cousin. I'm a 24yr old female and he is 26 yrs old , we are close though not as close as i'd like us to be. He is my grandma's sister's son by the way. I have had feelings for him off and on for years , and have had to deal with him having girlfriends and sex friends. He is currently single but had sex with some sex friend in february, and i'm always single. I haven't confessed my feelings to him because i feel there's no point , i know that if i confessed my feelings to him he would reject me. And i don't want to drive him away and make things weird and awkward between us. So i've sort of made up my mind that i should just give up on him and move on , and am now going through the stages of recovering from rejection. I've been seriously depressed since last month and i've been crying a lot. Before i was 95% sure he wasn't into me , now i'm 100% sure he isn't into me. Even if he doesnt find me to pretty/attractive i'm sure he sees me like a sister or like we are too closely related for something to be possible , there are many excuses your cousin could use for not being into you.
Anyway i've decided to put distance between us while i'm recovering and won't make any effort to contact him or hangout for the next few months. I decided not to contact him also because every time Its me doing it. If he wants to then this time he has to come forward , though i have no expectations he'd do so anyway. I don't think i can see him now without being depressed or crying. I'm tired of crying myself to sleep at night because of him and it seems like we were never meant to be and he's not worth me being into. Of course my feelings for him are more than just physical and there's more to him that i like but he seems to be a lost cause. I don't know if i believe him to be my soulmate but i think in my next lifetime things might be more likely to work out if we met. I'm tired of being obsessed with him and possessive , also i often get jealous of his friends for taking away his time to hangout with me. I often have dreams about him , and i touch myself sometimes when i do. I want to touch him almost everytime i see him and resisting my urges is unbearable , i have fallen asleep on his bed many times when i've been tired/sleepy and find his smell comforting but also a turn on. Also he is mostly into white girls and i'm black...
By the way , we are both not in school and we don't have jobs , and he drives but i don't and am in the middle of getting a license. He still lives with his parents and i live with my grandma and her other sister. He's a atheist and i'm a pagan , but we were raised in a christian family unfortunately so even if things did work out we would have to be very sneaky and secretive so the rest of the family wouldn't find out about us until we had money to get our own place. In a good month usually we would be able to hangout at his house and me and him would talk , maybe watch stuff or play videos games together in his room. We spend some holidays together , like halloween , thanksgiving sometimes and Xmas . We even spend our birthdays together since our birthdays are only a few days apart and since mine comes before his i usually get to do whatever i want when we hang out on my birthday. We have had sleepovers before as well , but not often and i usually have to go sleep in his mom's room .
It's not like i just met him a few years ago either , we have known each other since we were kids and used to play together and i have seen him many times at family reunions , back then i didn't have feelings for him of course . It was only after i moved to where he lives that i got closer to him and got to know him well. I feel like we really understand each other but i want to understand him more and for him to understand me more but he won't open up more to me. I feel like i can talk to him about almost anything and i've never had feelings for any other person like what i have for him , he is the only family member i actually see as family as well but i want to be more than family. I think even if he was my older brother i would still have feelings for him , sometimes i even see him as a older brother.
We are both scorpios , and i would have done things with him that i wouldn't even do with most guys but it seems he missed his chance now. The moves i have made have been many things , like posing a certain way on his bed and showing him my butt when i bent down to grab something . Wearing shirts that show my cleavage and hugging with and without a bra on and my boobs would often be on him when we hug and etc. Asking him about kissing and sexual things sometimes , like at the boardwalk i let him have the cherry from my virgin pina colada at the bar and i asked him about if he could do the cherry thing with his tongue. Us being at that bar at the boardwalk was the most confusing thing to happen recently. And this was after we had eaten pizza and we were making a lot of eye contact , though i'm sure he didn't catch on to what my eye contact meant. Anyway, at the bar i might have been imagining it but i think he was looking at my mouth . I don't know if i had something on my mouth or in my teeth but i was hoping he wanted to kiss me.He also walked in on me in the bathroom once which i am still confused about.
I've made many signs and signals that i was into him and he has been dense/oblivious and without a clue for years , or he knew and is choosing to ignore it. He would rather be into prettier women than be with me. When i revealed i had a incest fetish to him months ago he told me he had a cousin crush on some cousin i don't even know and he said she was very pretty. Last month , we went to the boardwalk together and when i asked him if he would hold my hand he pushed me away. He even told the guy at the stuffed animal game stand that we were cousins. And when i emailed him recently about how i wanted to be closer to him , he pushed me away again by saying he doesn't want to burden ppl by telling them his business.
When i revealed i had a incest fetish to him he said , "that's pretty neat, and quite common as well. I mean.. What do folks expect when you see family first compared to making friends as kids. Not like they talk to you about that stuff till you're older either. I don't think you're really an adult unless you've had one experience like a cousin crush or experimentation at some point in your life. "
And then he said , "On a side note, I've had cousin crushes too. Though it helps that the cousin I had a crush on isn't technically even related to me. Either way they're definitely super common. It just comes down to exposure really."
When i asked which cousin he said , "And to answer your question, my cousin kanasia. She's very pretty. "
He usually doesn't contact me and it always looks like I am the only one who is making things happen and is thinking too much about him lately. But, I'm not going to initiate contact with him anymore, if he is thinking of me then this time I expect him to come make a move. Though i doubt he would miss me or he'd even feel bad. I don't know if he is ever happy to see me or if he ever misses me. Seems like he is not even interested because if he was he would have dropped some kind of a hint in all the years i've liked him.
Everything points to us never working out the way i want , we don't have the same definitions of what love is or want the same type of relationship from people. He's stuck on wanting what most people want , a traditional monogamous relationship. I don't want a traditional monogamous relationship and the type of relationship i want is either a open monogamous relationship , harem , non-monogamous, swingers , or poly. As far as marriage goes i was never a supporter of it , and i have a different view of it than most so marrying him is up in the air if it was even possible for us to be together. Even if things did work out between us , i don't want to be a left over/last resort for him and be someone he just settled for.
By A lover
Hi guys I live in iran and I really love my mother's cousin I'm 16 but she is 18 i don't see her much but I'm in touch with her with social medias I have some problems first is that if she even likes me or not (we are good with each other) and the second one is that our families are some how close and I afraid if I tell her I loveher she probably don't likes it and the things between our families get bad the third one is that does she have a boyfriend ?
I don't what to do I really love her if I haste she may hate me or ignore me and if I wait (as I said she is 18 and soon Wil enter the university ) she might get to a serious relation with some one else
And I heard from her cousin which is one of my best friends, she has boy friend
I don't what to do I have lost many things for hesitating I don't want her to be one please help me thanks.
Hi I'm Edward and I am madly love with my cousin. She is my second cousin and she doesn't know about it. I fell in love with her when we were like 7 or something... But all these years I couldn't even split out a word about this to her. I really need help please