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NC30PlusYrs

2nd Cousin Relationship

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2 minutes ago, Lyric said:

I agree. I just want them to honestly try and stop thinking about everyone else.

Amen!!!!!

we only live once and who we live it with shouldn’t matter in this day and age...  with all the “rights” everyone in the world wants. I want the right to be with my cousin and us not be judged for it!

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15 minutes ago, Lyric said:

I agree. I just want them to honestly try and stop thinking about everyone else.

Exactly....

lets all keep in touch as this roller coaster ride continues...

im always glad to talk...  support is key here as we all have this common issue together.

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What’s the background of both of your significant other’s immediate families? Do you think there is a relation in how they were raised and/or their parent’s views on say religion and/or sex on their inability to let go of the taboo? 

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On 1/30/2018 at 12:18 PM, ABrad said:

Is there a possibility that you could spend less time with him (not completely out of his life) and see if you can pursue other dating opportunities? It’s hard I know when online dating is the main option (if it is) but if he knows you’re not solely focused on him and there’s a possibilty he may lose you perhaps that will bring him around a bit. 

The vainness of not wanting other people to know about your relationship is hard to deal with. I know. But you shouldn’t have to settle for less. It’s hard when you connect with someone on the level that you do with your cousin but you can’t have the full package. I know. But at least give yourself some space to think about what you want and to sort your feelings out. 

Perhaps only spend the night once a week. Not four or five times. You’re basically his live in girlfriend. 

I just found that you sent this to me Tuesday... 

its so hard to not see him, I want to be with him and I want to spend the night with him...  I know that if I pull away he will pursue me we’ve both been thru that cat and mouse game before several times in the last few months...  I also give in too and end up back with him.  I have been wanting to talk to him this week but it never seems like the right time, I am going to attempt it tonight...  my mind draws a blank sometimes as to what exactly to say so that not to get an argument started over it.  No more texting trying to discuss it, he won’t reply and no more phone conversations about it as he can get a little testy... so I’m doing it in person tonight!!!  I know there will not be a solution that happens instantly, but I think I have ever single right to know what he is thinking without hearing “I don’t know” all the time out of him!!! He does know something, he has to have some idea of what he wants and exactly what he can handle in life...

Who knows what will happen, I will update the outcome this weekend .....

 

The only problem that he sees us having right now is our other cousin finding out, the cousin that lives right down from him and could catch us.... what if "I" talked to the other cousin first, and explained our relationship to him?  I think he might not understand at first, but may end up going along with us, he and my cousin are close friends too.  I am not sure that I want to open that can of worms, or should I???  I am a little nervous something could backfire on me, as in my cousin, the one I love, getting extremely upset, as I feel he would, because I would be telling something that could never be taken back....  Undecided?

Edited by NC30PlusYrs

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On 1/30/2018 at 6:30 PM, Lyric said:

I agree. I just want them to honestly try and stop thinking about everyone else.

I didn’t talk to him much this week on our relationship - it never seemed like the right time, I did stay with him last night and he said that I basically hooked my wagon to the wrong cart, that I could do so much better than him...  what the hell. Ya know!  Then once we got in bed last night I said, “I don’t think I’m good for you, to be here with you” then he said “we never seem to get a break do we, there is always an obstacle in our way”...  this time meaning our other cousin that lives right near him, that could catch me over there.  So, who knows what any of that really means...  these are the sort of comments I get, which actually aren’t telling me anything...  then he starts getting sexual with me, and it was good....  tonight I’m going in full blast (I think) and having some sort of talk with him and if I don’t get the answers I’m looking for, I may grab my things and walk out the door... of course I will hurt like hell and when I get home I’ll miss him like crazy, but I deserve answers one way or the other... I’m all in and he’s either gotta think we have a future or talk to me about his feelings, I need some direction... all these months since summer and nothing..... this isn’t cutting it for me....

Edited by NC30PlusYrs

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