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Jaz

Me and my second cousin are in love but it’s complicated!

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it's really not complicated. you are just letting your emotions cloud things. both of you are in committed relationships with kids, and even if you're not legally married, you might as well be. so here's how you proceed...

you and your cousin cool things off. i mean like put a complete stop to anything and everything until you both get out of your toxic relationships. the two of you can not move forward and shouldn't even be thinking about it until you are both free.

and then, if you want to be together, do it. you're grown adults. your family has no doubt been disappointed with your choices in men thus far, what's one more disappointment? and chances are good that your family will see it as an improvement over your past choices.

there is nothing wrong with second cousins getting married. there are no legal, moral or medical impediments. 

honestly though, i think before you hook up with him you should get some counseling. seriously, you got pregnant at 15 (14) and he was cheating on you since you were at least 17, you confided in another guy that he was treating you badly. i'm quite curious about your childrens' father. how much older than you was he? how did he die? why were ya'll separated?

and then when you and he weren't together you hooked up with a guy that you're still with who is cheating on you with men. that puts you at so much risk! 

i'm not trying to be mean by saying you need counseling. i'm saying it because you have a lifelong history of making really, really bad choices when it comes to men, and you need to get yourself straightened out and learn to be good to yourself and to take care of your kids before you bring another man into your life and theirs. 

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