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Tweety1993

Does he feel the same way?

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I recently spent a weekend with my first cousin. I am 24 and he is 30. He is extremely good looking, and has a labor job so he is very physically fit. I couldn't keep my eyes off him all weekend. He was giving so many mixed signals, though. He touched me a lot, like grabbing my arm while we were talking and whatnot. I feel like they were often lingering touches. He walked around in the mornings wearing boxer briefs in front of me. I had a total emotional breakdown when we were talking about some rough old memories and he held me and took care of me until I got myself together. I decided to try and show some interest back, giving some flirty glances and a few lingering touches of my own, and I feel like he shut down on me. I don't know how to read this? He seemed really interested and then I tried to respond and I got nothing from him. He even brought up a story from several years ago when a very distant relative tried flirting with him at a family reunion and he cracked a joke that you don't go to a family reunion to pick up a guy. Guys, would you ever feel comfortable walking around in front of a younger female cousin in slightly ripped boxer briefs? I feel so lost here.

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from what you've told us, it sounds to me as though he wasn't intentionally trying to flirt with you, and that when he comforted you, it was just that... comfort. you said he seemed to shut down on you when you showed more than a familial interest. i know it's not what you want to hear, but i think you need to take that as a "no" and set your sights on someone else. my guess is that he didn't realize the effect his 'attentions' were having on you until you started responding, and that once he realized it, he tried to reel it back.

as for him wearing boxers, i don't think you should read much into that either. lots of guys have no problems wearing boxers around girls. just like lots of girls have no problems walking around the house in front of guys while they're wearing only a bra with their jeans or shorts.... after all, a bra is not much different than a swim-suit top. to guys, their boxers or boxer briefs cover as much if not more than their swim suits.

 

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On 5/5/2018 at 9:33 AM, Tweety1993 said:

I recently spent a weekend with my first cousin. I am 24 and he is 30. He is extremely good looking, and has a labor job so he is very physically fit. I couldn't keep my eyes off him all weekend. He was giving so many mixed signals, though. He touched me a lot, like grabbing my arm while we were talking and whatnot. I feel like they were often lingering touches. He walked around in the mornings wearing boxer briefs in front of me. I had a total emotional breakdown when we were talking about some rough old memories and he held me and took care of me until I got myself together. I decided to try and show some interest back, giving some flirty glances and a few lingering touches of my own, and I feel like he shut down on me. I don't know how to read this? He seemed really interested and then I tried to respond and I got nothing from him. He even brought up a story from several years ago when a very distant relative tried flirting with him at a family reunion and he cracked a joke that you don't go to a family reunion to pick up a guy. Guys, would you ever feel comfortable walking around in front of a younger female cousin in slightly ripped boxer briefs? I feel so lost here.

Hi Tweety,

First of all, welcome to the forum. :)

Anyways, I'm not sure I understand the highlighted part. It is a contradiction (at least to me). And so you know what? I don't think he is really interested. It is actually your projection to him that he is interested...in that kind of a way of course. For if he is interested, he will really show it to you. Know what I'm saying? He will make a move (not just a glance,...but a move) to you. You said that he is 30 and you are 24... Do you know if he has a girlfriend or not? How about you? Do you have a boyfriend? Just got out of a relationship? What? I just want to ask the status of your love life...  

At any rate, my suggestion to you is don't read too much into the flirting right now.  If he flirts with you, then you can flirt back, that's fine... fair game...up to you. However, apply your breaks for now and enjoy your new eye candy. :D Be vigilant though and keep your antennas up -- as soon as he make the move, you know what to do. ;)

 

Pooch

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