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Cuttinghimout

My mom hates him for a stupid reason

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This question doesn't have to be for a cousin, it can be for relationships in general. For the past ten years or so, this guy (who is not related to me) has been pursuing me off and on. However, for the first three years he wanted to be in a relationship with me, I was in a confusing relationship with my cousin. A few years after I stopped speaking to my cousin, this person and I became close. We always had a magnetic attraction, but my cousin told me to stay away from him because of his age. Ironically they were the same age. Long story.

Anyway, whenever this person comes up in conversation, my mom says, "I don't like him. Don't talk to him,"

When I ask why she says, "He's in love with you. He wants to sleep with you,"

Well of course he wants to sleep with me, I want him in that way as well. We're 27 and 35 I don't see what is the big deal, except that my mom thinks I'm still a virgin...which it really isn't any of her business in any case. BUT the problem is that I'm having to talk to him behind my family's back as no one likes him for his 'bad boy' reputation. I mean, this person gets people screaming angry, and all he will do is say hello to me.

The excuse my mom gives for not liking him when in conversation with someone else (In a nasty tone), "Oh he's in love with her. Just the way he looks at her, you can tell." or when she's talking to me directly, "He loves you. Don't sleep with him. I can tell he loves you," if the attraction is obvious with him, why can't she see it in me too? How is it wrong? I don't understand. I want to come out with this relationship, but I don't know how to get past this reasoning? 

Also, recently one of my female cousins told my mom that I had been in a relationship with this person since I was 17 which is not true. I only started speaking to him seriously when I was 23. This female cousin has never met him. Only heard rumors about him. So the lie kind of made my mom angry. I think she halfway believes it. If I come out and say that I'm going to pursue a relationship with him, she'll think that my cousin was telling the truth. I'm so lost.

This person has been extremely patient with me keeping him in the closet. Understandably he gets upset because I will go on a hiatus from him because I can't deal with the drama when I mention the idea of a relationship with him to my family. We won't speak for a while, but it is mostly one sided as he easily forgives me. I just stay away because I don't understand what I could be doing wrong by seeing him. They seemed more happy when I was 'getting along' with my male cousin, who treated me horribly, and still does if I have the misfortune of being around him.

Sorry this is so long. I hope someone can help.

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