So, here's my story. Me(21) and him(26) are cousin. He knows me inside out. And the other way around. We are like made for each other. In the meaning, i have what he dont. And he have what i dont. Its like we are not going to have preference nor personality arguing.
We rarely meet. Since we are basically live in different country. We meet at least every 2 years or more. Back then, we rarely chat to each other. We start to chat intensely last year since we have a trip plan together this year.
We are both were so distantly back then. We were never touch each other since we feel uncomfortable with that.
He came to my country last week. And i was so shocked by his change. since in the 3rd day he started to ask my hand(he says that he is cold. Yet his hands are warm to hot.) on the 4th day, he even hold my hand almost 24 hours. He even complain that his hand is burning. But he wont let go of my hand. He even do it in publicly like in a mall when we are with his good friends.
Not only that. He likes to hug me(purposely or not). He tries to sit on my lap whenever i sit beside him. He forcely asked me once to sit on his lap. But i hold my weigh since im. . .well kind of obesity and he's all boney lol.
In the 5th day. I felt something wrong with our relationship. So i asked my friend that he also willing to hold hand with(i think because he find her has the same vibe as me). And actually i want to pretend that im jealous. But in the middle, my insecure(i have this belonging guard insecure) got me lol. So i kept say "who are u? Do i know u? Dont touch me" a few times in a day. He said "why'd u say that. Im feeling sad. But I LIKE YOU".
And then i need to take my leave for school in other city. I felt guilty over what i did to him. I was thinking that im not even his gf. But it always happends to me. Either to girl or boy friends.
After i departed in my school's city, i tried to apologize to him. Via chat(because my conversation in english is not that good yet). But he insisted to call me for answer my apology. It turns out that he also think about me all day. And he almost cry because of it.
SO MY QUESTION IS. What kind of LIKE he mentioned here? Im afraid he is going to romantic road.
My friend said that we have a displacement possibility. Since he had someone he like. But got rejected before he say it.
But. . .what kind of brother sister relationship i have here? He even try to hold my hand and place it in his groin a few times when we have random chat while watching tv.
When i said my insecurity, he said that i must say what i like, or not from what he done. So he can change it to the way i want. What kind of brother would do and ask that thing to his first cousin sister?
Yesterday he caught a bad cold. And i came home just because he wont drink his medicine. As i remember he WILL listen to me. And yes. He listened me lol
The first time i came home, he said that he's so happy to see me. And he said i must know the reason. But i said that i dont. And he cutted the chat about it. We chat alot after that. He even say that i should not date a boy(idk if its a joke or not. Because he said he might be jealous)
He had a glance at my new headphone. He asked if its new. So i tell him that its from someone. He insisted i must tell him. So i tell him that its from someone who like me. And then he kept silent for a few moment while hold my shoulders from behind and then answer "but i like u too. But a different like ya?(idk if its a question or not)" the way he hold me was like trying to block my view of him.
For some reason i feel uneasy to leave that thing like that. So i tell him that actually im scared of that guy who gave me the headphone.
After that we were cuddling until bed time. We cuddling, holding hand, jokes and laughs at nothing all the time.
But he says that im his close friend and family. Does it mean he. . .doesnt realize his true feeling, trying to hide it in the name or family, feel confused because im his cousin or im really are a displacement of someone he like?
i am 22 years old and am studying medicine at imperial college london. i have a cousin who is studying dentistry in london as well she is 21 and is extremely hot and kind and caring and generous and smart. we are first cousins and our fathers are brothers, however they dont have a good relationship. i first started getting these feelings when i was 17 and we were both studying our a levels in the same subjects so we grew closer as we spent a lot of time together. over time i fell in love with her and think the world of her. the only thing i wish for is to get married to this girl and have children with her. she and my mother spend a lot of time together and are really good friends who get along with each other. my father also gets on well with her, so my parents would approve of her. i dont know what to do, from what i have witnessed i think she is interested in me too and is attracted to me but im not 100% sure. we text and as we both live in london in student accomodation she texts me and asks if i want to pop over to her place and spend some time together so i visit her regularly and she loves spending time with me, i make her laugh and we talk for hours on end, sometimes we would just talk for 4 or 5 hours straight. we both get on with each other and are perfect for each other. however there is a lot of dispute going on between our families over land in pakistan. however this hasnt affected our relationship and my cousin still gets on perfectly fine with my family. i havent told anyone yet and dont know what to do. should i wait until the dispute is over and tell her and my parents? or should i persue a private relationship with her now? i dont know what to do. help me.
So here it goes, I have a cousin who lives in the US, she’s half american half filipino. She’s 14 years old and I’m 23. I finished my bachelors degree in nursing. I don’t have a boyfriend as of now(by choice). It came to a point that we became really close with this cousin of mine, we talked about problems, family , dreams, anything under the sun. Until we came into a point when she started kissing me, I was shocked! And acted that it never happened since we promised each other not to do it again. Days have passed until I got really drunk, we sleep in the same bed, I closed my eyes, and she started kissing me, really hard. I was really dizzy and tired at that time so I just let her, Until she touches me below the belt and I said stop, the next day she was embarrassed with what she did and acted like it was a dream so I confronted her, until she said sorry. I told her that I won’t let that thing separate us, and I forgave her and put everything behind. I also told her that I am willing to do it over and over again so that she will not feel guilty because I dont want to lose ny cousin. I did exactly what she did that night and ended up doing it over and over again. We asked our selves if it’s right. She told me it’s not, but its not wrong either. What we did is a choice we both consented.
Is it wrong? Is it immoral? We’re pretty surewe’re straight, but why do we keep on doing this?
Am I inlove with my cousin?
By Jordan Colbert
Our story started roughly 2 years ago when my cousin confessed she had feelings for me. At the time she said this is wrong and we should not be doing this. But we continued developing our relationship anyway. We planned of our lives together after marriage, babies, places to visit, things to do and so on. We lived a happy life. Now after two years of constant back and forth of; this is wrong we should not be doing it and it’s ok let’s go ahead with it, she wants to end the relationship but isn’t doing it, just putting a halt to the boyfriend/girlfriend aspect and just wants to be friends. She says, “I should have been the adult in the room. I don’t want to continue doing wrong.” She feels that when we inform our family about our intentions we will end up creating a huge and permanent split in our family. We will be the reason for our family to break apart. People will hate us. Previously at the beginning of our relationship she had said that she doesn’t care about what other people think of her. When I brought this up she said well I do care now. I tried convincing her that I’ll deal with all the heat from the family, you can even say he is the one pushing for it I’m not that interested. I’ll be able to make the family come to terms with us. But she still says even if you convince the family I know it’s wrong and my mind will not be at ease. She says even if we get married I won’t be able to live a happy life because I’ll be disturbed about the fact that we are cousins and we shouldn’t be married. Also whenever she sees other cousins they remind her that we are doing wrong. She feels bad when she sees them. Sometimes she says that I look like her brother and that makes it difficult for her. The thing I don’t understand is that these are issues that were there during the first year of our relationship, why are they becoming unbearable now. She was able to put these thoughts aside then. Why can’t she now? I asked her do you want to end our relationship? Her reply was, “Yes, sometimes I want to end it. But sometimes I don’t. I don’t know.” I said why don’t you end it then. She said, “You’ve done nothing but loved me. And that’s why it’s difficult for me to end it. I’m thinking about our relationship in a realistic way and you think in a hopeful way. There is no way our family will allow us to be together.”
I feel that if I can convince her that we are not doing anything wrong. We love each other and there’s nothing wrong about it, she might change her mind. The thing is I’ve tried everything I could to do that. But she doesn’t accept it. I’ve given her examples of cousin marriages happening for so many decades. Her response is that if people have been doing wrong that doesn’t mean we continue doing wrong.
You may think she does not love me anymore and is trying to find excuses to end our relationship. That’s not how it is. She is a tough independent woman. She does not let other people’s opinions play any role in her decision making. She thinks for herself and sticks to her decisions however painful they may be. I know her very well. She still loves me. Just not enough to marry me.