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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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Guest Dave Harrison

It's a long story...

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Guest Dave Harrison

Well I didn't know that this site existed until around 45 minutes ago, and it was only 'on spec' that I Googled 'Love between cousins' - or something similar to that - and now here I am putting my story into words. 

A couple of years ago I saw a TV documentary advertised about a Scottish couple who were living together but couldn't marry, what being brother and sister I could understand why they couldn't, but anyway I decided that i'd watch this documentary to try to understand why my cousin and I have been in love with each other all our adult lives, and some of our teen years too if the truth be known as I was 14 and she was 15 when we started to hold hands, cuddle and more (I won't draw you a picture, use your imagination but it never went 'all the way').  This of course happened always when her mother - my aunt - was out of the house, and as she drank a lot in those days she was out of the house at her friends' place most nights, so a bit of a bonus really.

Well I turned 18 in 1975 and joined the army and she - Susan - was at college in Manchester.  After training I was posted to Germany and after a couple of years our Regiment deployed for an operational tour to Belfast in the bad old days, so it was something of a surprise to me to discover that Susan was living in Lisburn with a Military Policeman so I arranged a night's visit to them and an overnight stay.  When I arrived I was even more surprised to see Susan was heavily pregnant! But a good night was had by all and the next day I returned to my unit in Belfast to see out the final few weeks of the tour in a much more hostiel environment than Lisburn ever was going to be.

On our return to Germany I left the army and returned to the UK and to my intense pleasure found that Susan had also returned to Manchester and was living with her mother and the now 6 month old baby girl, Samantha, in the house that held so many memories for us both.  So Susan's mother agreed to babysit and we went for a night out where I made a pass at her after a few drinks, only to discover that she'd conveniently forgotten the teenage gropes we'd shared and that she didn't seem especially interested.  The next day Susan's mother goes away for a week to Wales and i'm thinking that it's going to be an uncomfortable week if I stay there, just goes to show how wrong I can be I guess.  Susan started chatting to me and claimed that she honestly didn't remember the teenage stuff but asked me if I really was attracted to her and what I was going to do about those feelings.  Do you know how difficult that question is to answer? Telling her I was attracted to her was easy because she was and still is a beautiful woman, trying to tell her about my feelings was way harder though and I kept stumbling over explanations I was trying to give to her, but that was all made rather moot when she blurted out that after we'd gone to our - separate - beds the night before she'd lain there thinking about it and had hardly slept a wink all night because she did in fact have similar feelings but had supressed them because she didn't want to have this harming the relationship we had built up over the years.  That was a fair one, but what were we going to do about it? We started talking about how to tell her mother and my parents, how our siblings would react to the news, and most importantly what about the sex side of a relationship, if we started one. Well, the Samaritans were brilliant when we phoned them, telling us that there was no UK law prohibiting marriage between cousins ergo there is no law stopping cousins from having sex together.  That night we went to bed together for the first time, and waking up together the next morning was wonderful.

Then the hard bit: how were we going to tell my parents, her mother etc? Well, we took the easy way out and left Manchester for Surrey without telling anyone! Eventually I phoned my Dad and told him and was pleasantly surprised that he was ok with it, as for Susan's mother though, completely different story as she went ballistic and refused to have anything to do with either of us for many years - even after we separated and I re-enlisted in the army. We got back together again later and that's been the story of our lives. In the army I spent many years in Germany, Northern Ireland and then on discharge lived in southern Africa.  Susan in the meantime had lived and worked in the USA and Canada for many years, but in 1988 she came back to the UK for a holiday to patch things up with her mother - a full decade after she and I first got together, it just so happened that I was also based in the UK at that time and so my sister phoned me and told me Susan was home and I should phone my aunt, who had contacted her to get my number, but my sister was smarter than that and insisted on phoning me herself! Well, I phoned and then drove the 4 hours to Manchester where we re-connected again and that same spark was there.  Susan's mother was going to bingo and I would guess it was only 5 minutes after hearing the car pull off that we weren't in each other's arms again and it was like the years apart hadn't even happened. Cue another few years of Susan's mother casting us both back out into the wilderness!

Well, that lasted until late 1990 when Susan went back to Canada and I de-mobbed from the army and went to Africa for the best part of a decade.  I miss her to this day and after watching the documentary am no closer to knowing why I had such strong feelings for her, and in fact still do have.  I know you guys on here are all in 'happy ever after' relationship with your cousins, and I wish you all well, I am in a relationship that's going nowhere fast and for at least 5 years have thought of Susan on a daily basis - sadly i'm not going to move to Canada any time soon - but really I just wanted to get this off my chest and this forum was a bit of a god-send when I found it!

Thanks for listening.


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Welcome to CC! I got here the same way. Just searching Google about cousin couple. Anyway, hang in there. Read my story when you get the chance. Cheers...

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