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Sealife’sbeauty

Married almost 25 years

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I have been married to my husband for almost 25 years.  When we met about 27 years ago, I had no idea that we were related.  Until his mother and my grandmother informed us that we were 4th cousins.  Neither one of us thought much of it and honestly didn’t care bc we really liked each other.   We went on to get married, and have two beautiful children who are now grown.   Have never really given it much thought over the years and just lived our lives.  My grandmother recently passed and her maiden name is the same as my husband’s last name (backstory: his mother married a man with the same last name as my grandmother -no relation - and after he died she never remarried.  She went on to have my husband but never married his biological father nor gave him his bio dads last name, she gave him her married name) which has raised some eyebrows.   And is causing me a lot of anxiety.   And now I’ve also found out through the relationship chart that we are 2nd cousins once removed.  I know that there is nothing wrong with our relationship and after 27 years of being together this shouldn’t matter.  But distant family members have decided to take it upon themselves to bring up that we are related.   And for whatever reason it is really bothering me.  Any advice/support you could give me would be so appreciated.  

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when they bring it up, just laugh and say yes, isn't it amazing? (or ironic, or funny, or crazy, or whatever...) it's only a big deal if you LET it be. trust me on this. here's an example of how this works regardless of age. a year after mark and i got married, we went on national tv on what was then a popular talk show. (montel williams.) we lived in a very small town, one that mark and i had grown up in, and my daughters went to school with the kids of people we'd grown up with. my daughters were in 7th and 9th grades at the time. when it got brought up at school, the girls just did the whole "yeah, so what?" kind of thing, and within a week, nobody even brought it up to them anymore. it's no fun picking on someone who doesn't react.

so don't react. live your life and be happy.

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