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saturnine

Can't get over him

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I have had a crush on my first cousin for a very long, long time. However, I am uncomfortable talking about it on a public forum and was wondering if anyone was willing to private message me about it and talk about it there. Just looking for someone to talk to about it.. I don't have anyone to talk about it to and it isn't like it is an easy topic to bring up with people. I have been humiliated by "close friends" for it in the past. Thank you so much in advance and your kindness is greatly appreciated :).

Edited by saturnine

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If you're using a nick name, you shouldn't need to worry about your friends.  Most people here want to talk on the forum.  Post a specific question, and see if you get an answer.

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whether or not she feels a sexual attraction to me. it doesnt matter to me about the intimate stuff as much as the just being there for her, thats what really matters to me. i just don't know what to say or how to ask her or where a conversation would start or when it would be appropriate to bring up the more intimate things we did as kids and as young adults. but as an adult i dont want her not talking to me about it like im not talking to her and bottling it up, my cuz (f) was the one starting it alot of the time playing around but now i (m) feel like i need to talk to her about it but not sure how or what to say or how to hint to her id like to try something again as adults???

if anyone could help us both that would be great maybe a PM or just a reply

Thanks for the help in advanced

could anyone with this experience or experience like it help me

it would be greatly appreciated,

 

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On 8/18/2019 at 12:26 AM, Ambra_Flows said:

If you're using a nick name, you shouldn't need to worry about your friends.  Most people here want to talk on the forum.  Post a specific question, and see if you get an answer.

 

On 8/3/2019 at 6:47 AM, saturnine said:

I have had a crush on my first cousin for a very long, long time. However, I am uncomfortable talking about it on a public forum and was wondering if anyone was willing to private message me about it and talk about it there. Just looking for someone to talk to about it.. I don't have anyone to talk about it to and it isn't like it is an easy topic to bring up with people. I have been humiliated by "close friends" for it in the past. Thank you so much in advance and your kindness is greatly appreciated :).

The thing is if you PM, you're really more vulnerable if you're talking about FB. Then a stranger who you talk to knows about your FB profile. I'd be more worried to do that than talk on this forum.  But I understand it's difficult. I'm brand new to this site. I have found the stories comforting, just knowing we're not alone. 

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As kids my cousin and I would kiss and "hump". Over the years since the death of my uncle (his dad) and his mom. We grew apart, although speaking and writing here and there. Just to give you a time frame... we are now in our 40s. Over the last 2yrs, for me that childhood attraction has resurfaced (keep in mind I have been married for 2yrs now 3kids). We had been texting back and forth, testing our memories. Turns out he was just as nervous as I in bringing up what we did in the past and how we still feel now. Just last week, we discussed it (well after he kissed me and I didn't pull away) and even more recently we gave into our passion. For me, I'm at a place that I'm telling myself....no! You're married,  he's your 1st cousin, this can't be...you're disappointing God. We haven't spoken about what happened yet but all I can say, is when I'm around  him, the attraction I feel towards him is so strong....I've NEVER felt this attraction towards anyone like this before. I've gotta say,  I'm grateful to have found this forum. I need to confess/vent and share with no judgement.

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9 hours ago, Gthings said:

Over the last 2yrs, for me that childhood attraction has resurfaced (keep in mind I have been married for 2yrs now 3kids). We had been texting back and forth, testing our memories. Turns out he was just as nervous as I in bringing up what we did in the past and how we still feel now. Just last week, we discussed it (well after he kissed me and I didn't pull away) and even more recently we gave into our passion. For me, I'm at a place that I'm telling myself....no! You're married,  he's your 1st cousin, this can't be...you're disappointing God. We haven't spoken about what happened yet but all I can say, is when I'm around  him, the attraction I feel towards him is so strong....I've NEVER felt this attraction towards anyone like this before. I've gotta say,  I'm grateful to have found this forum. I need to confess/vent and share with no judgement.

While God allows the marriage of cousins, he does not allow adultery. Because you are married, I would kindly advise you to stay away from your cousin. Continuing what you are doing is going to lead you to a lot of serious trouble and problems in the long run.

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I agree 100%. I've cried, journaled, prayed profusely. I think that's what's bothering me most. I wish we were both bold enough to have shared how we felt many years ago.....but reality is we didn't so now I'm trying to recondition my thought back to the "just family" way of thinking. So not easy.

Thanks for responding.

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