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Hillda

What do we do?

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My cousin and I started a relationship about a month ago after a party, I have been single for 6 years him for 3.. I'm 7 years his senior with 3 grown up children, he has a little one from a previous relationship. We're both the life and soul of family occasions. Our mothers are sisters that haven't spoken in years. We both laugh at the same things and have an amazing connection. He started this thing between us as it had never entered my head before now, but thinking back now I can see he was attracted to me before. He says I've always been beautiful and I know the feelings are genuine... We are really scared of being found out and how our family would react. Also the mother of his child and the implications of that. Hes a brilliant father and she uses his child like a tool. I'm very independent and dont see a lot of my parents so would tell my parents and they would have no choice but accept it. He is very close to his parents and sister (who is like my best friend). He's so scared he wanted to call it off and I accepted it but we have carried on. I feel like it's a big mess but we have so much fun and when we're together it's just perfect. We both have professional careers and are capable of meeting others but this just feels so right but so wrong at the same time. What do we do?  As its early days carry on in secret and see how it pans out? Stop it now? Help

Edited by Hillda
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First of all - take several very deep breaths and RELAX!   This is a new relationship and you need to take time to figure it all out.  You aren't teens so you can make your own decisions.  If the families have problems they are their problems - not yours.  The one thing that is most important, in my opinion, is his small child.   How old is the child?  That problem can be handled as well.

Don't give in to fear and risk losing happiness.

We are here to support and encourage you.

HUGS

Nat

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His child is 8 and they have a fabulous relationship. His ex girlfriend is an absolute nightmare and I'm certain if she were to find out she would continue to use the child as a tool. Our family are always wishing we would both meet someone nice. 

We both make each other smile and none if us has had that for a very long time.  

I think long term family would accept it if not initially.

I put my sensible head on and think we should stop and in the next breath I really don't want to.

We're 44 and 37 so not at all adolescents. We're from the UK so there are no legal implications, Queen Victoria and Prince Albert were first cousins.

Thank You for the support 

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An 8 year old who has a fabulous relationship with the father - the ex is going to lose!!!!

There are going to be lots of people feeling very jealous of your happiness and some of them may be relatives.  LOL

So please keep us aware of how things are going.

HUGS

Nat

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