• Announcements

    • KC

      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

      Be informed on better ways to stay safe on the web -- Source: Mozilla
Guest purplexy54

me and my Cousin are falling in love

This topic has had no activity within the past six months. It is recommended that you start a new topic instead of replying to old topics.

What should be our next move!?   8 members have voted

  1. 1. What should be our next move!?

    • Abandon ship!!!: disconnect with my cousin and try to get over our feelings for each other.
      0
    • Confess to my mother that i am falling in love with my cousin and leave it like that.
      1
    • Hold off from telling my mother, and just secretly pursue a long distance relationship with my cousin.
      8
    • Pursue the relationship with Nicholas, and try to let go of my cousin.
      1

Please sign in or register to vote in this poll.

28 posts in this topic

I have gotten back in touch with my cousin last year after not having any contact at all for 13 years. i felt that i was falling for him, but i wasn't exactly sure if he was feeling the same way for me...so i tried to find someone else, to latch on to, hopefully fall for and let my cousin go. and i found Nicholas. he is EVERYTHING that i could want in a boyfriend, but there's only one problem...i can't seem to fall in love with him. because my heart belongs to my cousin. i told my cousin about Nicholas, he was very upset...but i didn't expect him to be so upset. me and Nicholas was about to go on our 3rd date, and i knew that this was going to be extremely important because i knew Nicholas was going to ask me to be his girlfriend, but i didn't know what to do! then the night before our date, my cousin says "can i tell you something? without you taking it too seriously?" and i said "okay?...I'll try" and he says "I'm falling for you."

      my cousin told me to get with Nicholas, because Nicholas was a nice guy, and overall he wanted me to be happy...so i accepted Nicholas' relationship proposal, and my cousin went crazy. he was very upset...my cousin has been hurt many times before, and he has a good sweet tender heart. (BTW, i live in Texas, and my cousin lives in NY...so it makes our predicament even more so difficult). that night, we stayed up all night talking on the phone, then texting each other poetry to help soothe the pain. my cousin has such a way with words, and i also like to write poetry for a hobby. my poem that i wrote to my cousin as a reasons to the poem he written me:

                                          "I loved the flower that did grow

                                          The beauty of it too complicated to show

                                          the ache we feel as we pluck the petals one by one

                                          Is all too great, but needs to be done

                                          His honest sweet eyes of the darkest brown

                                          Could never meet my own, instead look down

                                          His lips in which only my imagination would kiss

                                          Are of the softest pink, too tender to not miss

                                          Stand back and watch as our flower gives in

                                          To it's own creator's hands...such a sin 

                                          In this soil, in this spot, in this life it wasn't meant to be...

                                          No matter how beautiful you can be."

      but anyhow...with the guilt and confusion i felt afterwards, i came to a moment of realization: i can't handle a relationship right now. so the very next day i told Nicholas that i couldn't be with him...that i had to figure some stuff out. and that i couldn't tell him because it was a "private family matter" (i still think it's pretty funny, at least i didn't lie to the guy! lol)

      i finally came out to my sister (me and my sister are very close) and she believes that i should completely disconnect from my cousin and don't lose Nicholas since he's such a great guy. She has been praying for me to have the wisdom to make the right decision, and the willpower to go through with it...meaning, she is praying that i will abandon my feelings for my cousin.

      so my heart rests in the hands of my cousin, and although i may love Nicholas, i can never be IN-LOVE with him as long as that fact remains. what should i do? and it's not like it's easy to just pursue a relationship with my cousin since he lives all the way in New York and has no intentions of moving down here since he has so many obligations up north.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Purplexy,

my answer to the poll there is just a suggestion, so don't take it too seriously :)

Anyways, I'm also pretty new at this, and when I told my best friend how I feel about my cousin she also said I should go out with someone else, get a distraction from him... I don't really have anyone else in sight, but you do and he seems like a nice guy but I think it would be unfair to Nicholas to give him hope like that when your heart belongs to someone else. If I were you I would try to have a relationship with my cousin, but I would try to take it slow, and I would not tell my mother until we both knew that we're strong enough for the family to know. I'm sure there are lots of people here that can give you better advice, but I hope this helps :) How old are you and your cousin, btw?

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hey there  Ms. Daughterofeve!

      the advice you gave me is great! and i have been debating that option very often, but i cringe at the thought of losing Nicholas if things dont work out between me and my cousin! and plus...Nicholas is in love with me...and i told Nicholas that i loved him back. i realize now that it was wrong, but it was true.

      the last person i wanna be is the cold stone bi-atch that breaks sweet guys' hearts. over all what i'm saying is, what should i say to Nicholas if my cousin says "yes"?

oh! and btw, i am 20 years old and my beloved cousin is 28. i know we've got a bit of years between us, which was one of the reasons we didn't expect for us to bond so much! thanks again for reading and taking the time to reply, it means so much to me.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

purpleplexy54,

Welcome to the forums, first of all!  :biggrin:

Before you decide to do anything, the first thing would be to sit down and do a bit of thinking/talking with your cousin about your current situation, starting with how you both feel about cousin relationships. Do either of you feel the your feelings for each other are wrong at all? If so, I would suggest stopping right now while you are ahead. Any bit of doubt between the two of you would only make your relationship that much more difficult to handle. Cousin relationships are definitely not for the weak, it usually comes with a lot of drama (depending on your family background and both you and your cousin's living situations). If you decide that the both of you don't want this, then I suggest cutting ties off with your cousin for a while so that the two of you could move on in peace.

If the two of you are indifferent, then the next thing would be to ask whether the two of you are able to handle a long distance relationship. As if being in a cousin relationship isn't already difficult enough, being in a long distance relationship makes things even more difficult. You are more prone to become lonely and yearn for the company of the other person a lot more, causing a lot of heartache and stress if you aren't emotionally strong enough to handle a relationship like this. If you both are willing and ready, then Skype (or other video chatting services) and your phones would be your best friends. Also, depending on your living situations, making efforts to see each other would also be a good idea. If the two of you are still living with family, it might also be a good idea to get your lives settled before pursuing the relationship seriously. Just take your relationship slowly and get to know each other, as daughterofeve said. Make sure the two of you are both emotionally mature enough to handle a steady relationship and be prepared for a long emotional battle with the family, if necessary (depending on your cultural background). Also, be sure you both are seriously committed to each other before telling the family anything.

As for your situation with Nicholas, it is up to you whether or not you would like to keep him around. It really depends on which option you pick. If you choose the first option, do you think you could learn to love Nicholas the way he loves you if you choose to pursue a relationship with him? I don't think it would be quite fair to him if you used him as a means to get over your cousin, even if your intentions in the end will grow to be good. If you would like to pursue a relationship with Nicholas in the event that your cousin rejects, I would suggest waiting until you are fully over your feelings for your cousin first. It wouldn't be fair to him if he was just the rebound. You could also choose to keep Nicholas around as a valuable friend in the event that you feel you are not ready for a relationship in general. Just don't instill any false hopes of a relationship within him or else things will get awkward.

In the event that you and your cousin decide to pursue  relationship with each other, I don't think it would be fair to Nicholas if you kept him as a "back up" in case things don't work out between you and your cousin. I would suggest either keeping him strictly as a friend (if he can handle seeing you happy with someone else) or cutting ties with him if you can. You can tell Nicholas as nicely as you can that you actually are in love with someone else and would like to be friends instead. Just do it quickly, smoothly, and without instilling any false hope of a relationship in the event that you and your cousin decide to break things off.

In conclusion, just tell Nicholas the truth. If he really loves you like he says he does, he would understand. I hope this long essay helps. Good luck and give us frequent updates!  :ok:

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well guys, this is my plan. Since i am 20 years old still attending college and still very dependent on my parents, i've decided to wait before pursuing a relationship. In the meantime of me trying to get my life together, i will date other ppl, and i've told my cousin to do the same...after i am able to take care of myself, and if me and my cousin still feel the way we do about eachother, then i will come out and tell my parents, bt if not, then the love spel has been broken and we'd move on with our lives.

i know full well what drama would lay ahead of me. my family is a very close onne, we are all so very close, and me having to be disowned by them will not be a difficult thing to undertake. so i want to be good and ready for that...

although right now, i'd love nothing more than to be with my cousin...i mean just to be around him just to know what it feels like to be with him...but first things first. if we were meant to be, it will happen, but i will not go to NY to be another urden for him to bear. he has so much on his plate already. my poor cuzito.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

purplexy54,

I'm proud of you child. Had I thought things out like you have, I would have had a much different life. I don't regret it to where I would want to change it now, but I would have done as you are and take my time. The big difference is, back then there was no sort of resource like this to just google and find. Don't jump into anything until you are ready. If you really feel so strongly about your cousin, you must have this same conversation with him. He needs to know you are interested, but you are just not yet at the point you are willing to go further. I posted to another new member who is of Puerto Rican decent. She is somewhat unsure as to where it is heading as well. I'll link that thread for you, and see if anything sounds familiar.

http://www.cousincouples.com/forum/index.php?topic=4832.0

See if my advice to her might be what you are coming to on your own, and be of further help to you. I have a feeling there are issues I brought up for her to consider, that you may wish to modify to your particular situation. Age wise, you are right about at what I consider a "sweet spot" to start considering just where it is you want to go, and what you want to do with your life. You have been an adult for a couple years and are starting to see the world for what it is, but still young enough that it lays at your feet. I think for the moment, you have started to lay out a good plan.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear Hawk,

      I very much appreciate your advice and support. This morning was a lil rough for me. I told my sister my plan...and she is upset with me for even considering putting my family through that. i've made a promise to my mother that i wouldnt move so far from her...and if i still feel for my cousin, i'd have to move to NY whereas we live in Texas.

Sometimes i wonder "why?"...you know? If i wasnt meant to be with my cousin, why did i fall for him? I know it's not right to question the Lord....but why? is it, that this will make me stronger? refusing my cousin will make me stronger? fighting to be with him against all odds will make me the person God wanted me to be? sometimes i feel like denying myself the pleasure of spending the rest of my life with someone. Sometimes i feel like disconnecting with my cousin AND Nicholas. and just be alone and cry. just be left alone wth my own pain and sorrow, never to marry, never to break anyone's heart ever again...

me and my family are very close. i am close with my mother, my father, and my sister. and for them and for the sake of keeping them happy, i have to give up what makes me happy. i would always look back to these moments and think "what if?" or "damn, i was crazy"

i'm a wreck right now...i wish i could just fly to ny with no one knowing, and turn off my fone, and just be with my cuzito. just to feel what it would be like...

i just feel like my life is not my own...this body, this life belongs to my family. and i have to make sacrifices, because if i dont, i'm the selfish one...i'm the inconsiderate one...i will burn in hell, because i am the worse daughter you could ever wish for.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

purplexy54,

Calm down, you are not going to burn in hell for being the worst daughter ever. Stick with your plan of putting any relationship with either on the back burner for now. Get you in a better situation first, then start figuring out exactly who you really, truly want to spend the rest of your life with. If your family is willing to disown you over your cousin, they do not love you as much as you love them. That is the bottom line. They may think they are making you do what is right, but they get to make their choices, not yours. If they will not look at the facts and the religious aspect of it honestly, then it is all about manipulating you into what they want, regardless of your happiness. That is NOT loving you, as much as you love them. Ignore their drama for now, get you in position to ultimately make a decision. If you let them live your life for you, I will tell you now, you will at some point say "what if."

Disconnect with both right now, and go be alone and cry if you feel like it. But when you are done crying, take a deep breath and realize you are ultimately going to have to live your life for you, then go live life your way.....

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

purplexy54,

Hawk has given you excellent advice, as always. You are not going to burn in hell because of your feelings for your cousin. God gave you these feelings for him for a reason, but he also gave you the free will to do as you want with those feelings. I don't think God will hate you if you decide to act upon them one day. I'm glad you have a good plan and you are sticking to it. You know you always have support here on those days where you feel like crying.  :hug:

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Life is messy - no sense in waiting for it to stop being messy. If you want something you should go and get it. Don't plan on losing - plan on winning.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

thanks guys...my mind wasnt in th right place when i wrote that...

i agree all with what hawk has said, excellent avice...but i will not go as drastic to say my family doesnt love me. i feel that this is what they was raised to believe, this was what i was raised to believe and they want me to do what's right in their eyes. they dont want me to get hurt. i understand that, and them getting over me being with my cousin would be very difficult for them to accept.

That same day, me and my cuzito tried to figure out what we should do...and all we could come up with was disconnecting...it was so painful to do. something so crucial having to be done over text messages? i couldnt do it...we even said "good bye" but we couldnt do it. so as of right now, me and my cousin are just trying to hold off on certain topics that we can not discuss...we cant say how much we want eachother, how much we wished the other was here, wishing that the family would just be okay with it.

also, i will pursue a relationship with nicholas, and i know that my feelings with him will grow, and i will no longer feel the guilt of my cousin on my back...although that is so difficult to accept...

i once did a tarot card reading on what life would be if me and my cousin were together, it said that i would look bback to the past, thhat me and hiim would begin to fight...i suppose we'd crush underneath pressure. we probably aren't as strong as we'd want to be...

the woman who get's my cousin, is the luckiest woman in tthe whole wide world...even luckier than me.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know you have responses to this but this is mine.

CHOICE TO THE POLL?  NONE OF THE ABOVE!

YOU should listen to YOUR HEART.  BUT STAY IN SCHOOL AND STOP THINKING ABOUT ROMANCE!!!

Put those tarot cards down, shut off all outside advice, and ask yourself what YOU WANT.

If you love your cousin, guess what?  YOU NEED MONEY!

From what you write, you should disconnect with Nicholas, put off all relationships (but follow your heart which belongs to your cousin) and HIT THOSE BOOKS!!!

SCHOOL >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> ALL.  Above dating.  Above romance.  Above peer pressure.  Above what your friends and sisters say.

Because that is your single ticket to being with your cousin.

GRADUATE first!!!!  Stop thinknig about romance!  That's later on after you get a job, buy a house and have your cousin shack up with you from time to time.

If your family asks, say I want to study hard, get a job and become independent.  That's laudable and admirable.  and if they mention your cousin, say that you are not thinking about that now.

Remain unconvinced?

Want to let tarot cards and what family say dictate your life?

UUSE THIS SITE and REAAAAD what people say on here!  All the people who follow the same advice others gave to you marry someone "good enough" but then end up back on here REGRET that they listened to others and frankly miss their cousin who GUESS WHAT.  MOVED ON!  And imo that's their own fault.  PEOPLE SHOULD listen to their heart, and also *again* HIT THOSE BOOKS to make dreams happen when they can.

As a college student, do not ever put academia as #2.    This is an understatement because back in college all we did was slack off and you cannot afford that in today's economy.

If your dream is to be with your cousin, work for it.  Fight tooth and nail for it and don't back out from that dream.

As for what I want to say about family, it's unorthodox but if they're misguided and you're close to them this is how it is: you need to keep it a secret to protect them.

And if you have a large family it could be that even though your family accepts it, extended may not

My family would accept my loving my cousin.  Why?  Because they love me and they see how he loves me.  When I was close to emergency hospitalization when my kidneys almost failed, my cousin never left my side.  They can see how much he loves me.  And my mom realized it as well.  No other man will ever love me like he does.  However, my extended family would make my confession a LIVING hell.  We would hear no end of it and we've already been "caught" which we nonchalantly passed off as "us watching tv.  want to join?"  (thankfully we were fully clothed).  They are gossipy and overall very unpleasant. 

My family and my cousin does not deserve the backlash from that gossip.

So I love my family as well and while they would never disown me if I told them I loved my cousin, they would have so much flack from the other members if they heard about it that it would hurt ME.  It's not fair to my cousin and I but it's also not fair to my family.  Therefore it is a secret and when we are both older, we plan to live the rest of our lives together, without a care as to what others say.

While keeping it a secret is not an ideal answer, life is not an ideal situation to begin with.  But I can tell you this.

As hard as long distance relationships are, what is much much much worse is when the person you're madly in love with wants to be with someone else.

This is how your cousin feels. 

If you love your cousin, stop playing with these ideas of Nicholas.  Stop being cruel.

Do the right thing and get financially secure and settled first and follow your dreams.

When you are both financially well off, you can visit each other with relative ease and no longer need to depend on your family for finances. 

Life does not start and end at 20.  You are at the beginning and you won't depend on mom and your sisters' advice forever.

Remember that today isn't set in stone.  YOU carve it.  You shape it.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

BRAVO,Starclimber!!!!!

purplexy this is some great advice, RUN with it and don't look back!

The thing I most agree with is that you should break away from Nicholas, you are being most unfair

to both him and your cousin. Let him find some one that can give their all to him, he deserves that.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

purplexy54,

I didn't mean to imply they don't love you M'dear, only not as much as you love them. With love comes respect. You respect them MUCH more than they do you, if they are willing to disown you over this. You are concerned MUCH more about their happiness than they are about yours. You will eventually find yourself manipulated by them in other instances as well if you don't live your life for you at some point. Might as well start now. Please listen to me and starclimber. Let's get you educated first, then move forward. Let's look at an instance of why I want you to do so. Let's say you do decide, drama be damned, you love your cousin and want to spend your life with him. You are standing there with an advanced degree in hand. They start the wailing and gnashing of teeth. You look them in the eyes, and say "Look, I have this degree here. I've been to school. I'm not some uneducated child you are talking to. I did learn how to study a subject, and I have studied the subject of cousin couples. While I love you and respect you, you are wrong. If you are willing to learn the facts, I will show you. If you wish to be blissful in your ignorance, that is fine as too, but I know better and I will NOT listen to it." Can you see how, it may not keep them from going off on you, but it puts you in a much better position to make your case?

I also agree with starclimber on the tarot cards. You may find yourself vulnerable to them if you are not careful. You might as well go ahead and toss them in the trash before you put any faith in them at all. Look to make decisions based on the knowledge you have gained, and not reading things into the random turning of cards, or rolling of dice. I personally think they are dangerous, but at the least they should not be trusted for life changing decisions. Please just go ahead and listen to us. We are not giving you random thoughts here, to be interpreted. We are telling you these things from real life experience, where we see you potentially making mistakes you can avoid.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

aw nelly. Ms. Star, you really are a piece of work, and i very much value your advice :) i guess what holds me back is the complications...one: my parents know that i'm seeing nicholas, and know how nice he is and that i do like him, so for me to disconnect with him, they'd wanna know why. second: it would break Nicholas' heart, and right before valentine's day that he claims is such a bad luck day for him. and i'd feel really guilty about that because he didn't do anything wrong. third: the future that me and my cousin would have (besides the family drama) would be so tough to deal with...

you see? my cousin is going to be taking care of his sick mother soon, and idk for how long...but with the condition she is in, she's not going to be getting any better. where would that leave for me? he wouldnt have any room to have a relationship!

Ms. Star, you are absolutely right, what i have been doing is wrong. And you are right, it is not fair to my beloved cuzito that he is broken up about this, although lately he has been pushing me to nicholas, and saying that he'll make me happy...

there's just so much to consider...including the fact that we'd have to marry in NY and we can't come back to texas because i'll get arrested for marry my cousin.

Hope to hear back from you Ms. Star, although your post seemed to show a certain annoyance towards my situation. but still, all the more, thank you very much for your advice.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear Hawk,

      I have every intention to do my ultimate best in school. studies do come first and i will not be distracted by that, because when push comes to shove, i need to be able to take care of myself, and i will depend on no man for that (love of my life, or not).

I am not entirely sure if my cousin wants to go through with this. you see? he's the selfless type of character that to keep the peace in a situation, he'll take the back lash...but i do think it is long overdue, i need to talk to my cousin seriously about us...because whether we want to admit it or not, there is an "us"

I dont want to hurt my cuzito anymore, and its not right for Nicholas to stand by me for all this. he does deserve better! and as much as i'd feel guilty about breaking his heart, i set myself up for it. and i deserve everything he has to say to me after that...i'm just so nervous...i'm going to talk to nicholas tonight...and idk if this is the best time to do this to him. and valentine's day is always such a bad day for him...and i already brought nicholas a present :(

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm not too sure who all is keeping up with this. i bet some ppl must be fed up with me and my whining by now...but i am OVERJOYED to say that i came out to Nicholas and told him that my heart belonged to someone else. i know it must be frustrating for him to know that, but i wanted him to know the truth. Nicholas still wants to go out on dates and hang out still, and i have agreed to just for fun and since we do enjoy each other's comapny. Now, as for me and my cousin......we are in a undercover long distance relationship! and i swear, we should have done this long before! it feels so good too say "i love you" and not hold anything back! i've never been this excited about being in a relationship with someone before...and i've never been this uch in love and have that same true love in return.

    Me and my cousin call it "temp dating" though. we don't know what we're going to do in the future, but we've decided to live in the now. Me and my cousin are happy, in love, and less hectic. I have decided also, that if our feelings remain the same by june, i wanted to take my mother by the hand, and tell her my feelings about my cousin. I will not beg her to accept us, i will not through down a blue print of our future together. i will simply tell her that i am in love with him.

    I am still attending school, and i plan to go all the friggen way with it too, i believe my mother will not go too crazy about me and my cousin...because my mother is a smart woman and i'm pretty sure she sees that as much as me n my cousin talk everyday, she must know for sure that we have bonded greatly.

When june comes crawling along, rest assure you will be hearing from me...because in june is the Annual Family Reunion in orlando, and my cousin will finally be there, and so will i...and we will see each other for the first in a year...and for the second time in the past 13 years.

oh my goodness....I'M IN LOVE WITH MY COUSIN! AND I CAN'T IMAGINE WANTING ANYONE ELSE!

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hi purplexy!  after reading countless stories about loving cousin you got my interest to reply. you hit me at my inner core... your story is almost exactly the same to mine 12 years ago. sounds old? im only 27 now but i begin to love my cousin when i was 16... your problem was also my problem not just once but always, along the road of loving my cousin many years ago... and your solution was my solution also, but along the course of loving each other, he will suddenly broke up with me because of fear that our family might discover our secret.. we don't want to destroy our good family bonds... but maybe because our love was so deep, we keep on reconciling months after the broke up... my story is very long for it lasted for almost 5 years... 5 years that full of laughter and tears, joy and pain, love and hate, it all happened only the two of us knowing... so to cut it short, let me bring you at our last conversation. that was 7 years ago... as usual at the peak of our love, he was suddenly ignore my calls, text messages and even my presence... he did again trying to hamper or stop his feeling because of family fears, things like that... then i got tired, he was always like that for 5 years.. so i decided to finally stop myself on loving him as well. i did it on purpose because i was tired of fighting for him without seeing him ready to fight for me... then i met a guy, a perfect guy to divert my feelings to. he is charming, intelligent, kind and funny... i dated him and begin to love him... i thought i already found the one that i will love for the rest of my life... then when my cousin found out about this guy, there he came again begging for my love... that time more determined and fearless... he even ask me to go away from our family to a place where nobody knows we are cousins.. but i rejected him, and told him i don't love him anymore, which is my greatest regret now... i did it because i believed on that moment that i don't love him anymore... that i already found the one, the one who can save me from my 'sin' for loving a cousin, and who can save my family from shame and hatred... then i got married and now i have a daughter... after that, its killing me to think how upset and hurt he was because he became so thin and dark... his hair grows long and he looks untidy everyday... i can't look into his face every time he is around because im afraid i forgot everything and run to him and hug him... my heart was breaking every time i think of his looks, so i know i still love him... years past and i never stop loving him... i always thinking of him every time im alone, even im in a good and somehow happy marriage, i can't help myself but think how happy i could be if im with him... there are so many regrets and what ifs on mind... that makes my life full of regrets and miserable... i am living with my family while loving my cousin... and nobody know but me, and now you...

so i want to advise you that since you already made up with your cousin, be strong enough, for your love story will be facing many more challenges... fight for your love, or else you will live a very lonely life... learn from my experience and i will be happy to know if you will end up marrying each other...

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am In the same dilemma I'm in love with my cousin so badly,and its a close cousin but I can't help myself lam really in love and he loves me too my family will go crazy if they find out about this and its worse bcoz we are from a black nation they won't approve!

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm also in love with my cousin but he doesn't know and I am scared to tell him. We are both the same age and just met a camp 3 days ago. He is cute, nice, and funny. We didn't talk much but I really like him and I think I am in Love with him....

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok , first off I'm in love with my first cousin....he feels the same. We live in different country's but talk everyday. We kissed wen we were younger at 14 (both drunk)  and neither of us could get over it, (because it was the best kiss I have ever had to this day )we knew then we were in love. But we never talked about it after it happened....until 9 years later :) I thought all these years he was disgusted by me for what we did, but he wasn't , and we felt EXACTLY THE SAME about each other....that we loved each other :) We are making plans to see each other , because we need to know if this is real or infatuation .But are going to keep it a secret. We don't want to hurt anyone, especially we don't want to hurt the family. But after 9 years of living in different country's and having no contact we still feel the same about each other, we can't help it we tried :) We are going to see each other for a year if all goes well and if after that time we still love each other and it's working then we will tell our family the truth and what ever happens, happens, if we have sex and the spell is broken then we just move on and nobody would be hurt. I can't live with not giving it a try with him. We have discussed that we won't be having children together, we both agree on this. Think about the situation this way......when your old and going to die.....would you regret not giving your love a chance ? If the answer is yes, then you know what you have to do :) Hope all works out

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If I were you, I would [move]not tell anyone and go for my cousin[/move]. I mean is he your first cousin because if you decide to marry him, there would be genetic problems cause your genes are too close. But anyway, I would make sure that I really like my cousin and if he is willing to be there for me at all times, then I would tell my family and not [glow=red,2,300]GIVE A DAMN ABOUT WHAT THEY SAY!!![/glow]  :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: It's your life, do what you want with it.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

To add to my post, i will just say that now finally given the chance, when we are  both older and been through a lot, I know we are hoping for the best even though neither has brought up direction beyond dating as it's scary. Yet,  I can see the same feelings she used to ha've shining through and I feel more than I did in the past(good) and we seem more even each day. Anybody who says this is wrong because we are closely related  can keep quiet  because we have a chance to build on  a foundation that's survived the test of time. So if your one of those "awe gross" folks y'all know what you can do!

Ok , first off I'm in love with my first cousin....he feels the same. We live in different country's but talk everyday. We kissed wen we were younger at 14 (both drunk)  and neither of us could get over it, (because it was the best kiss I have ever had to this day )we knew then we were in love. But we never talked about it after it happened....until 9 years later :) I thought all these years he was disgusted by me for what we did, but he wasn't , and we felt EXACTLY THE SAME about each other....that we loved each other :) We are making plans to see each other , because we need to know if this is real or infatuation .But are going to keep it a secret. We don't want to hurt anyone, especially we don't want to hurt the family. But after 9 years of living in different country's and having no contact we still feel the same about each other, we can't help it we tried :) We are going to see each other for a year if all goes well and if after that time we still love each other and it's working then we will tell our family the truth and what ever happens, happens, if we have sex and the spell is broken then we just move on and nobody would be hurt. I can't live with not giving it a try with him. We have discussed that we won't be having children together, we both agree on this. Think about the situation this way......when your old and going to die.....would you regret not giving your love a chance ? If the answer is yes, then you know what you have to do :) Hope all works out

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your content will need to be approved by a moderator

Guest
You are commenting as a guest. If you have an account, please sign in.
Reply to this topic...

×   You have pasted content with formatting.   Remove formatting

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor