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Will you listen to my story?

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So, we kissed just a few hours ago... i don't know what to do, I checked on line to see if i was crazy to do such a thing to her, but it felt so right...

She's gonna leave in two days to take her board exams and i wont be seeing her for a couple of months. so what immediately popped on my mind was that i needed to make memories with her while she's still here. I've always had a crush on her and in a way I've always felt she did too (with me) because we always flirted with each other when we were together.

So back to what happened a few hours ago.

We chatted in one bed because she decided to sleep with me of course with her big brother on the floor with us in the same room (my other cousin), we played and giggled, I hugged her a few times, and started kissing her cheeks a multiple of times. then it kept on running on my mind saying "kiss her lips". My brain kept urging me to kiss her lips so I decided Id kiss her cheeks again but this time hitting her side of the lips. not all of the lips at one time but just at the tip of it. she responded " why did you kiss me?" so i was taken a back and said to myself "oh :bleep:! oh :bleep:! well, i tried that's it I give up she clearly doesn't like me and all of this is a delusion in this messed up head of mine" my heart was beating so fast I was pretty sure it shook the bed.

I decided to turn away from her. at that moment i had an epiphany, i thought to myself well I'm already deep in this hole I'm in might as well go deeper, so i faced her this time, but I was shocked that this time her face was only a few centimeters away from mine that if i moved just a little bit our lips would touch. but i was scared I was dimwitted so i moved back because I didn't want to be rejected or worsen our relationship. At this moment i couldn't see us ever being friend ever after what I did to her. So I stood up and went to the toilet to take a piss thinking on my way there "holy :bleep:, what the heck did i just do". I stood there looking at myself through a mirror and decided to tighten up my balls one more time.

I entered the room once more and I pinned her to the bed. she looked at me, it was dark I couldn't see her expression but i did see her lips through a slit of light. I dove in and kissed her, she kissed back I was happy yet shitting myself at the same time thinking to myself "what the heck am i doing" i stopped kissing her, rolled over to the side. she said she wanted to wash her face (i told her something disgusting ^^). But doubt ran through my mind, what if she was trying to wash of my kiss?

I followed her and as she was washing her face I decided to wash mine too. Then I suddenly held her neck, I felt a little force opposing mine but not that much. I leaned in to kiss her again and we shared our second kiss. a few hours later I woke up early to get to ( somewhere) but my mind kept on running if what I did was right...

That's why i decided to post it here and listen to what you people have to say, a lot of people judge on line without ever experiencing it themselves so i hope with people that have experience i may learn from you. sorry it took so long i wanted it to be the exact detail of what happened a few hours ago.

so do you think i forced her into this? do you think what i did was wrong? would it be stupid to do it again?

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  • Administrator

sounds to me like she was a willing, but maybe hesitant participant. would it be stupid to do it again? i don't know.  if she says "no", (or "stop" or something of the sort) then stop, immediately. but if she returns your kisses, i'd say it's not so stupid.

going further than kissing at this point is probably not a smart move though.

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  • Moderator

Well, no - you included too many clinical details and profanity.  We can read between the lines and this is a multi generational site.

I would suggest you cool the hormones and improve the behavior,


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  • Administrator

i agree with nat on the profanity. i just didn't say anything because our filters censored most of it with the bleep-bleeps.

and seriously jed. she asked you to sleep over. do you really have to ask me what that means?

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