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OrchidPure

What drew you to your cousin?

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There is a lot of discussion on here about the circumstances in which people fall in love with their cousin and the subsequent family drama that unfolds after the love is revealed, but rarely do I hear much about the cousins themselves. Like any two people who meet and befriend each other, there are things about these cousins that spark our interest more than other people we meet- their sense of humor, kindess, thoughtfulness, talents, eyes, hair, build, life vision, character-

What I'm curious to hear about is, how you were drawn to your cousin particularly? Was it his/her mind, eyes, style? What was that aspect of them or a moment with them that suddenly made you think, "this person is special" and why did it strike you so?

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It took me a while to realize that she was the girl i had been been waiting for in my 20 years of life. Shes smart, funny, nice, a gamer, and shes the only girl i have ever considered to be truly beautiful. What first drew me to her was when we would drive from place to place and we would both be quiet. The first thing we talked about was what music we liked and then eventually i found out she was a gamer. As time passed i soon found myself falling for her as she let me into her life little by little. My soul told my brain to tell my heart that she was the missing pea in my lonely pod (that was so terrible but i had to type it  :laughter:). Fast Forward through time and here we are.

I am certain that she knows i have feelings for her, how she reacts when i finally tell her is yet to be seen.

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There are so many things that drew me to him.  My cousin and I reconnected online after not seeing each other for 25 years. He was going through a rough divorce, and I was going through a rough time in my relationship as well.  We started chatting all day, every day. We spoke on the phone for the very first time after a couple of days of online chatting, and were on the phone for 4-5 hours that very first time. I knew there was a special connection there from that very first phone call. His voice made me tremble, and he says the same about mine. But his mind is what truly drew me to him. We talk for hours on end every single day, and have for 5 months now.

But I guess when it really and truly hit me was when I went to see him in the hospital.  It was about 3 weeks after we started talking, and he suddenly wasn't there for almost 24 hours straight. Since we were talking 5-7 times a day on the phone, and chatting constantly in-between calls, I knew something was wrong. I'm in Spokane, WA, and he was in Seattle, WA. I called his apartment manager and had her go check on her, she called the paramedics and he was in ICU for 4 days. I won't discuss the reasons, that is his story to tell. Anyway, I took time off work and went to see him. I stayed in the hospital for 3 days and 2 nights, sleeping in a chair next to his bed. He didn't even know I was there until late the 2nd day, but he was very agitated and when I held his hand he would calm down.  Late that 2nd day a friend of his came to see him. I got him to wake up, and asked him if he knew who we were. He knew the other friend's name, and when I asked him who I was, he replied "Omnipresent" with a little smile.  Late that night/early the next morning (it must have been around 4 am I think) he woke and commented "you stayed..." 

He knew who I was the next day, but I had to leave to head home. I gave him a big smile and hug and kiss, and turned and left. And burst into tears as I left the room. I sobbed all the way out of the hospital, and most of the way home. I knew then that what we had was very deep and that he would be a big part of my life.

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Wow, where do I start? I don't remember a time in my life when I didn't love him. I remember when I was about 3 or 4 and my other cousin from my dad's side asked who my favorite cousin was. I didn't even have to think about it. Of course my favorite was Eric. At that time, I was young, I didn't know why.

He's 5 years older than me, so he matured much sooner. I used to watch him and my brother, Jonathan, play on family vacations. I was so jealous of Jonathan. I would stay with my younger girl cousins and we would play with barbies and such, but I always remember hoping Eric would come in and play with me. Ask me to come outside and ride his four-wheeler or swim races in the pool.

As I got older though, I noticed we were becoming closer. He paid less attention to Jonathan, and more attention to me. The first time it truly hit me that we had something special was the summer after my seventh grade. We still tell jokes from that summer. Years passed, but it is just recently (me at 19 and him at 24 years old), that I have decided to pursue him. Every time we see each other again, it is like I'm meeting him all over. Like I get to rediscover every single year the treasure that is him. During my last visit, we spent every minute together. One night, we sat at McDonald's sipping on coffee talking about past relationships. He voiced his negative opinions of the guys that I've recently been involved with, and it was obvious he was jealous. I didn't hide my jealousy over his past girlfriends either. Another night, I convinced him to drink with me. I told him I wanted to see all sides of him, and I've never seen a smile so big. When I asked why that amused him so much, all he said was, "I just think that's interesting." We bought a six pack, hung out watching movies on the couch, and, I thank my buzz for this, I laid my head on his chest and played with his hands. He didn't resist. In fact, he intertwined his fingers with mine. I've never felt so alive or so right, even with my ex-boyfriend, who I had dated for a year and a half. I was nervous to look up at him though, so I continued to stare at his hands throughout the night. We went our separate ways to our rooms across the hall. He looked at me so intensely, I felt like he was going to kiss me. Instead he said, "Goodnight, cousin." It stung like fire. It was as if he had to remind himself of what we are. I woke up in so much shame the next morning. I was afraid to leave my room and face him. But when we met in the living room, he smiled at me, asked me how I slept, and offered to make me coffee.

Since I've come home, he's continued to text me. Last night we had an incredibly revealing, cryptic, conversation, if that makes any sense. I feel like the more I talk to him, the more of the risk I run of telling him straight how I feel. It's obvious, and we both "know" we love each other, we just haven't said it out loud. I think we're both afraid of where our relationship will go after we admit our feelings to each other, but we can't continue on the same road were on.

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To be perfectly honest.... Her big booty, Its just so perfect and round, not saggy or droopy. and boy can she twerk it lol.

you asked :)

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My "cuz" had this cheesy smile on her FB profile that awoke before I and wondered my heart while  dreamt. We had never met, I new her older sister but thought she had been an only child. I had grown-up with my cuzs step-siblings, they lived round the corner.

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It was his smile, and his eyes, and muscles. lol but it was also the way he looked at me, his personality, and how he made me laugh. 

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Hard to answer because I've been drawn to him since I was a kid (first memory of it from when I was 10), for unknown reasons I attribute now to God, but later when I was a teenager what caused us to be best friends was our shared love of music (he played guitar and I sang, and we loved playing and listening to music together), and his mind, the way it worked and the things he was interested in, including spirituality. I was raised Christian but he wasn't raised in a church so he had a more broad sense of God, which was fascinating to me. He was always reading some interesting book about religion or music (or both!). He was a budding luthier at the time and I used to like watching him work on instruments. And of course, I thought he was handsome! ;-) Lovely thick black silky hair, and green eyes. And just how tender he was with me, and so kind. And he followed me into vegetarianism (we made it hard for our poor mothers but they were sweet about it, LOL!).

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THe first time I saw her I was blown away but not old enough to understand why (I was 10)

20 years later we met again and although I would've never told her, everyone around us sensed it and did everything they could to keep us apart. THe funny thing is that we had never once spoke about our attraction. We knew that it would disrupt the family.

A decade later we spent a week together. I almost didn't go because of all of the other fires I was putting out. A relative from the other side of the family talked me into it by telling me that I needed the time away...she was so right.

THe first few days we had some small talk and both of us sensed this "weird" energy and so were uncomfortable being around each other. THis time it was a totally different group of family that was around and somehow they sensed it too.

From the way she walks, the twinkle in her eyes, the gum (sounds wierd I guess but I love it) she exposes when she has a big smile on her face. Her long sexy hair. The sounds she makes, her intelligence and beauty, she is feisty, determined, independent (sometimes almost to a fault haha) and funny...everything about her drew me to her.

She is lean and mean (figure of speech) is petite and built like I think a lady should be...

I felt so nervous around her but also comfortable once we made physical contact after being apart for only a few hours (kiss, hug etc). I want to take care of her for the rest of our lives.

We can spend days doing nothing at all and be perfectly content. THis was the lynch-pin - I knew that she was the one for me, my soul mate...

I kept thinking that I had never thought or felt about a woman this way and why hadn't I found someone who was like her. I didn't know what love was (although I thought I did until I met her) She was right there in front of me even though she was my cousin.

We were married last week. Now she is my wife.

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THe first time I saw her I was blown away but not old enough to understand why (I was 10)

20 years later we met again and although I would've never told her, everyone around us sensed it and did everything they could to keep us apart. THe funny thing is that we had never once spoke about our attraction. We knew that it would disrupt the family.

A decade later we spent a week together. I almost didn't go because of all of the other fires I was putting out. A relative from the other side of the family talked me into it by telling me that I needed the time away...she was so right.

THe first few days we had some small talk and both of us sensed this "weird" energy and so were uncomfortable being around each other. THis time it was a totally different group of family that was around and somehow they sensed it too.

From the way she walks, the twinkle in her eyes, the gum (sounds wierd I guess but I love it) she exposes when she has a big smile on her face. Her long sexy hair. The sounds she makes, her intelligence and beauty, she is feisty, determined, independent (sometimes almost to a fault haha) and funny...everything about her drew me to her.

She is lean and mean (figure of speech) is petite and built like I think a lady should be...

I felt so nervous around her but also comfortable once we made physical contact after being apart for only a few hours (kiss, hug etc). I want to take care of her for the rest of our lives.

We can spend days doing nothing at all and be perfectly content. THis was the lynch-pin - I knew that she was the one for me, my soul mate...

I kept thinking that I had never thought or felt about a woman this way and why hadn't I found someone who was like her. I didn't know what love was (although I thought I did until I met her) She was right there in front of me even though she was my cousin.

We were married last week. Now she is my wife.

CONGRATULATIONS gotitbad! That is AWESOME!  :grin:  :grin:  :grin:

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It was her angelic face. It was love at first sight. I did not know that we were cousins. Her smile, her laughter and all of her. I want all of her nothing less. If she's a cake, I'll eat all of it and not worry about the calories. :)

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Well...his personality reeled me in. He's super funny and very opinionated. Also, very caring and sensitive. We talked on FB all the time and confided in each other so easily for years. Neither one of us were that open with anyone else in our lives. I didn't think much of it at the time. Then when I saw him again, for the first time in 20 years, I was hooked cause he was so attractive and I suddenly had a huge crush. Didn't know he did too.

The communication turned into talking every day for hours at a time. So we fell in love. It was the best moment of my life when we revealed our true feelings nine months later cause up until that point I was always wondering and it drove me crazy.

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his listening skills. when he listens, he tunes everything else out and it's like you are the entire world at that moment. BUT....

it wasn't just the way he listened to me. it was the way he listened to my kids! he would give them his undivided attention, and sometimes it even made me jealous LOL.

but the thing that tipped me over the edge was when he told me (before we started dating) that he thought his ex was the sexiest woman he'd ever known, despite the weight she'd put on (which was significant.) i thought wow, i want someone to love me like that! and boy, am i grateful, because since he and i got married, i've put on over 50 pounds, most of which has been gained in the last few years.... and i'm secure in the fact that my weight will never be an issue for him (even though it is for me!)

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Even though we haven't gotten to 'that level', I have a very strong connection with my cousin.  She is my first cousin - mother's side; her mother is my mother's sister - and I have always been able to talk to and with her, even about the most intimate or personal of topics.  I can talk to most folks about most things, but she is by far the one that knows the most about me.  She too returns this favor and lets me know quite a bit about herself, things that she doesn't even tell her own confidants.  It's this ability to be so open and carefree that drew me to her, along with the experiences of just hanging out and growing up.

It really is that simple.

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Its pretty weird how we met, But I guess its the only common way for cousins and relatives to see each other after few years...and that would be at a funeral. What drew me to him...is his eyes, smile and he was very sweet at that time, well he is still sweet. I really got confused during that time because I had this akward feeling the first time we met and had the same feeling after we were together with other cousins for like 2-3 weeks.

It was like magic. I never had that akward feeling towards other guys but it just explode when I saw him; And I dont get that attracted to guys on first meetings! :huh:

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Just want to add that we can sit in the car for hours while on the road without talking and still communicate in silence. Just holding hands. She always holds my hand. There's the connection and happiness just being together. We don't get bored when we're together. We don't miss anybody. It's like you and me against the world. I missed those times.

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i was 8...he was 11...we wanted to be in each others presence from then on...wasnt physical at that point...just an insane need to look at each other...play...hold hands walking around with all the other cousins who werent holding hands...when i was 14 we ended up in a car alone coming home from the beach with him driving and he stopped the car in the middle of the street...looked over at me...just stared...i slid over and we kissed...its been more than 40 years...i get the same feeling with each kiss...we are not together...we have found ways to get together for 40 years...both got married to others...had kids...did the normal thing...then 3 years ago we started talking every day and now we cant stop it...its too strong...dont know what to do...except cry and hope i have the courage to make our mutual dream of getting together happen..."and thats all i have to say about that"... :smiley:

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Her amazing skills at being a cribbage partner (we lost once over an entire weekend of a family reunion).  Oh, and yes, she is smoking hot. Those are both true, however, she and I clicked on every level and simply grew closer and closer over time. When we were both going through divorce - the rest is history.

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I?ve been thinking about this question for a while now. At it seems hard to get the answer, because it all started so long ago, I developed this crush on him when I was only 10 years old (which was 20 years ago) and made up excuses (really silly ones!!) to talk about him with my friends. And I think I?m still doing the exact same thing....  :grin:

But it really hard to point out something specific though, it may have something to do with his eyes, most likely has something to do with his personality. He was smiling all the time when he was younger and was very friendly to everyone. Now he doesn?t smile and laugh THAT MUCH anymore (got more serious and complex person, an adult...) but I still see the same sunny spark in him...  :smiley:

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It's been many years, but I still remember those things like they were yesterday.  I didn't really meet my cousin until we were 14 (b/c her father worked overseas).  I was drawn to her the moment I laid eyes on her: she was graceful, modest, with a shy smile which melted me into a little puddle.  She had perfect translucent skin (like a china teacup) and soft brown hair, but it was not simply her physical beauty that drew me.  Within a few hours we discovered how much we had in common, and both of us felt completely comfortable talking with each other.  (Well, except that my heart was doing double-time flip-flops!)  We were both a lot more insecure than we appeared to be, b/c her mother was a capital-B [word which rhymes with Witch], and my father was a capital-B [word which rhymes with Mastered].  (Later on, we both spent a lot of time in therapy sorting that stuff out.)  But she was the first and only girl/woman I have ever felt completely open and free with.  That openness faded after she lost her courage and gave up on us, but there are still times when we can talk with that old intimacy.  :cry:

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