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Simon909090

New CC Member. Excited to tell my story :)

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21 posts in this topic

Hehe, I just found out about this forum and I thought I'd register and tell my story. It's not really a complete story, because we're still young (I'm 21y/o male and she's 17 year old girl) and our love story is still unfolding.

She lives in Canada, and I'm living in Australia. We both grew up in our respective countries and have never visited each other at all. In fact, before April of last year, I didn't even know that she existed. I knew that I had family over there, but I didn't know the specifics of who was there. She also only knew us through a couple of odd photos here and there... seemingly so little, and yet it's even more than how much I knew about her and her family.

Anyways, we first started talking because of (you'll never believe this lol) a Facebook POKING war!! Facebook suggested that I poke a random bunch of people of like 5 or 6. So I did. One of them was her. A few hours later, she poked me back... so I poked HER back. After a long round of poking each other back and forth, I messaged her (my first time ever talking to her) "STOP POKING MEEEE :P". After that, we started talking casually - just asking about what it was like in Canada, talking about school, the differences between Canada and Australia. Small-talk... random nonsense.

At this point, I just saw her as my cousin and nothing more. After some time, our messages started getting just a little bit deeper and she started sharing with me some personal things about what she was going through and I also shared some of my stuff. She wasn't going through the best of times and so eventually she kind of broke down and expressed how much she appreciated that I started talking to her - as a cousin, of course. I thought it was really nice and after that, we continued to talk - but a bit more like close friends, instead of just family. We both kind of admitted that we thought the other was quite attractive just as a casual compliment to each other. She said that when she first saw a family photo of all my brothers and sisters, she instantly thought I was the most handsome haha. And she said that when she saw that one of us had messaged her on FB, she was secretly hoping that it was me. I also admitted that I thought she was quite attractive and that she was very pretty in my eyes. Over time (I don't know how it happened - it was gradual and very organic), we started to feel something sparking between us. It seems very fast, but within about 2 months, we both admitted that we actually loved each other and that we really wished that we could have been together. We Skyped every single day, sometimes letting a call go on for up to 8 hours non-stop. If I had to go out, I would text her on my phone.

I know that it's really early, but we were already feeling a sort of 'soulmate' relationship forming. We told each other that no matter who we ended up with, that we would secretly always be special.. that our relationship would be more than just cousins, even MORE than lovers.. but something really special because it was the first time that either of us had really opened up and shared ourselves with someone else. However, we thought that it would be too weird coz we were cousins, and it would be so difficult coz we're separated by oceans. For a while, it was great. We were secretly loving each other, but we knew that we would eventually find someone else. We told each other "it's okay. If you find someone else, I'll be happy for you." But neither of us really felt it. We wanted each other, but neither of us told each other. About a month after that, we had a talk about me visiting... and she actually said that she wanted me to make love to her for the first time, even though we wouldn't be together. It wasn't just a quickie - she really really respects her virginity and treats it with the utmost sanctity. But she knew that no matter who she ended up meeting, that I would be the one that was always in her heart. That was the person that she wanted to take her virginity. She thought that it was silly to ask because she was like "oh of course, a stud like that would never go for me" lol. But I actually admitted that I would be so incredibly honoured. It was such a lovely conversation because we talked about how much we loved each other and how this act of love would really cement us as secret and special lovers.

But... there was still that knowledge that we wouldn't be together. After a while, the pain got too much.. for both of us. We both broke down and admitted that we couldn't actually take the pain of knowing that we had both met that perfect someone but had to forgo them for someone 'lesser'. We had a really long talk about the implications of us actually considering being together. Social implications, legal, biological... but we found that the only real implications came from Social - ie, how OTHERS would see it. We decided that we don't want other people to be holding us back from being truly happy. So we started dating... in secret. We continued to talk to each other on Skype. I share my room with lots of siblings, so I had to always keep my 'aural' conversations casual (talking about day-to-day stuff), but in the skype text chat window... we were talking about our relationship and our love. Growing both of them day by day.

After a while, we kind of somehow got the desire to tell someone. The first person was her sister. We were both SOOOOOOO scared, because we didn't know how people would react. It was hilarious :P. Her first reaction was "..... DUHHHH!!! GOSH DO YOU THINK I'M STUPID??!? It's SOOO obvious!! Yea that's fine, I think it's great"... definitely not what we were expecting haha. Over the next few weeks, we slowly started telling more people... eventually telling all of my siblings one by one. My sister, as it turns out, already knew... because she accidentally eavesdropped on one of my messages that I sent her. The others thought it was weird at first, but quickly got to realizing that what we had was real. They were all happy for us. One of my brothers even shook my hand and said "congrats bro" haha.

Since then, we've continued to talk, and share, and connect on a deep level. Sharing everything about us - things that no one else even knows about. Loving each other every day. She's in Canada, so I can only skype with her or text. I have yet to have my first kiss with her, or my first hug. Because of the time difference, she often goes to sleep while I'm still in my evening, so I'd skype with her on her ipod and i'd watch her as she falls to sleep, both of us whispering "I love you...". Then when she's asleep, I leave her messages so that when she wakes up, she has all these messages from me - because I don't wake up until it's early-afternoon her time. We really have a strong and "invincible" (as she calls it) relationship and we absolutely adore and love each other. It's not just a casual flirty relationship either. We often have little arguments and we have our down-moments. But we always get through them together, and find our way back into each other's (virtual) arms - every time getting stronger and closer together.

That's the end of my story so far. We have yet to tell the parents - that's the biggest challenge. But we hope that by having all of this support from our siblings, that the transition will be easier. I'm actually planning my first visit this July. She's going to take the train and pick me up from the airport... alone. Just her. No family to force us to pretend that we're not secretly in love. Gosh, I really really cannot wait for that day. It's all I ever think about. Getting off the plane, seeing her in the distance, running up to her and hugging her for the first time hehe. We both talk about that day all the time. Eventually, she's planning to make a move to Australia so we can be together in the long-term. But we're still young and want to continue to grow together before we make any huge moves.

I hope that my story can be of some inspiration to others out there who are doubting whether or not it's possible to have a REAL relationship with your cousin. It is. Our relationship is as real as any other, and perhaps even MORE loving than many couple relationships out there.

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Oh man, what a beautiful love story, its' good that you guys are not rushing to be together. Take it slow and enjoy every moment.  I wish I had met my cousin at an earlier age.  Now that we met when we are both married, things are so difficult lol. Good luck buddy.

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Oh man, what a beautiful love story, its' good that you guys are not rushing to be together. Take it slow and enjoy every moment.  I wish I had met my cousin at an earlier age.  Now that we met when we are both married, things are so difficult lol. Good luck buddy.

Thank you for that :azn:

Yes, we're really taking our time to get to know each other and really develop this relationship before we take things further. While it's really hard that we've never even met in real life, it kind of helps us to focus on the actual emotional relationship - getting us both mentally ready for each other before we meet  :angel:

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This will be interesting to follow. I would like to know how you feel the very first time you lay your eyes on her in person for the first time. I think Id be nervous...enough to jump outta my skin! I can tell you that I and my now wife, were so nervous around each other (in a good way) that the strange energy kept us from being able to even eat!

This is better than a movie!

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haha me and her joke about that all the time :-). we tried writing out our love story out on paper and read it to ourselves and laughed at how much this sounded like it could be a movie or something.

so exciting though.. coz it's real!! I'll post up on the forum when we eventually meet and I'll share my experience. i know for certain that we're going to go absolutely nuts haha... that first kiss. sigh... it's all i think about these days :-)

appreciate all the support!!  :tongue:

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that was real cute story. am really happy for you both for a support u both got from ur respective siblings. i just hope in west its a taboo to be with a first cousin. am a girl and in love with my first cousin (older than me) but he wouldnt dare to do the move. it is very depressing how its seen in our cultures. i know its totally ok in some Asian and African countries. after a lot of struggle i admitted that i have feelings for him but he was afraid of the family reaction and ofcourse how the society would react to it. so mine is not happily ever after.

looking forward to read about u more.

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OMG OMG OMG I just told my mum yesterday and she's fine with it. Happy for us in fact :)

I'm about to tell my dad today. I just typed up a 2 page letter and printed it out. about to leave it on his desk for him to read when he wakes up. After this, then my entire immediate family will know  :smiley:

@Meganoone

I'm actually living in Australia and our family (while asian) is very 'western'. We're not a typical asian family. I really feel for you. The pain of knowing that you can't be with the one you truly love is incredibly deep. I know this, because me and my cousin were like that before. We were scared of all the reactions, we thought it would never happen - and it really hurt. But now... we've come so far because we were both willing to stick our nekcs out for each other.

I don't fully know your situation in detail, but you CAN be with your cousin... if you really love him. Don't wait for people's approval. Society doesnt always have to know. Ie, legally it's fine in most western countries (except like half the states in the US), and socially.. you don't need to publicly advertise your relationship. Your family, that's the tricky part. But honestly, I also thought my family would think I was a freak, before I told them. And now they're all happy for me.

I say go for it. If you really love him, then go for it. The pain of knowing that you let these fears stop you from taking that step... the regret will tear you apart later in life.

Good luck. Sincerely

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Nice story. I would suggest that you limit your physical contact. I know that she offered her virginity to you. I will not take advantage of that. I'll respect her and honor her. Since the possibility of you being married is more likely, I'll save the sex after not before marriage. Just in case she gets pregnant, that will complicate the situation. Go slow. Get to know each other. She's 17, let her mature a little bit. Don't focus on sex, instead get to know her more in person.

You're the one who will control how far you will go. Once you have sex, it will be hard to focus on real love. Please read Jason Evert, love can wait. "Love can wait to give and lust can't wait to get" Cheers! No choice but to rejoice.

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Nice story. I would suggest that you limit your physical contact. I know that she offered her virginity to you. I will not take advantage of that. I'll respect her and honor her. Since the possibility of you being married is more likely, I'll save the sex after not before marriage. Just in case she gets pregnant, that will complicate the situation. Go slow. Get to know each other. She's 17, let her mature a little bit. Don't focus on sex, instead get to know her more in person.

You're the one who will control how far you will go. Once you have sex, it will be hard to focus on real love. Please read Jason Evert, love can wait. "Love can wait to give and lust can't wait to get" Cheers! No choice but to rejoice.

hehe, funny that you mentioned this. because we just talked a couple of weeks ago. And we decided that we didn't want to do it any time soon. As you said, we know that we're going to be together, so there's no rush. We'd rather just focus on the relationship right now and not let things get muddled up if (again, like you said) something unplanned happens.

So yea, we're taking things slow and we don't plan to do anything until after we marry.

Thanks for the wise words. Even though I came to that conclusion before reading this post, I appreciate that there's someone out there willing to give that same advice :grin:

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I'm glad you're doing it the right way. If you can wait, you'll be happier knowing that your relationship is founded on true love not lust. You'll enjoy sex (btw, it's like a nuclear bomb because of the chemistry between cuz) something to look forward when you get married. She'll also love you more because you're a gentleman and not a gentle "maniac" :) Cheers! No choice but to rejoice.

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My beloved is coming in less than a month!!!!

In less than a month, I'm going to hold my dear cousin for the first time in my entire life. We're going to have our kiss, our first time holding hands, our first date... the first time i ever get to hear her voice for real instead of through speakers or earphones :)

We've been through so much to get to where we are, but we're really doing it.. it's really happening and it's happening so soooon  :grin:

Thank you all for the support!!!

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My beloved is coming in less than a month!!!!

In less than a month, I'm going to hold my dear cousin for the first time in my entire life. We're going to have our kiss, our first time holding hands, our first date... the first time i ever get to hear her voice for real instead of through speakers or earphones :)

We've been through so much to get to where we are, but we're really doing it.. it's really happening and it's happening so soooon  :grin:

Thank you all for the support!!!

<---- IS

...waiting for the results...

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This thread was started over  a year ago. Not sure the original poster has ever been back.

We may never know the ending.

If a post is over a year old with no current updates, you can probably assume this person is no longer

active on the forum.

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