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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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Guest Mrs. Sturgill

Mrs. Sturgill and the family

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Guest Mrs. Sturgill   
Guest Mrs. Sturgill

    I first met Brandon when I was too young to remember anything, but everyone tells me that even then I hung to his leg for attention and had a serious infatuation with him. As I grew older I remember seeing him at family dinners with his ex-wife and always thought that he was perfect.

    I separated from that side of my family due to the abuse I suffered from my father, his uncle, and never saw him again until ten years later. I remember hearing something during that long period of a person going to prison and dismissed it as nothing to concern me.

    I was working a dead end fast food job when his parents would pull up and remind me that their son was getting out of prison soon and didn't make the connections after so long of being uninterested in that side of my family. Not soon after the frequent visits from his parents and promises to be a stable influence as a friend, a woman and great looking guy pulled up to the drivethrough window, the woman confirmed it was Brandon and his sister, I took one good look and did a double take," I love your tattoos!" And that's when he knew he got me, haha.

    The next day he made his sister call my work and asked to pick him up. After a night of playing cards and drinking a few cold ones (only I participated in), he came back to my place and we fell asleep in my bed. All we did was sleep, but it was the most restful sleep I had in years. Within a few days he asked me out to dinner and a movie and the rest is history.

    We never hid our relationship. We never denied what was going on, but I did make sure that both sides of my family knew it wasn't their place to sabotage my happiness when we are both consenting adults. It led to sleeping in my car for a few months during this really cold winter, but he was by my side no matter how cold, how complicated, or how angry. Even still I admired him for always putting his daughter first, even before me.

    Often I would have to wait all day until she went to sleep to see him until everyone realized that I only had love in my heart for them both, but it made me appreciate seeing a father care for his daughter no matter how tough the circumstances. She has come to accept me as a mother, her "incubator", as she calls her, was never in her life. We are happily married and I have a wonderful daughter from it.

    We are what sociology calls a blended family in so many more ways than one, with a stepdaughter, cousin marriage, age difference of nine years, and a history of incarceration, but one couldn't ask for a more cohesive and understanding family that has a perfect life despite the lack of extended family.

    Don't let anyone walk on the love you feel for anyone or anything. I suffered all of my young years from both sides of my family, during foster care, battling drug use, eating disorders, and even myself. Living my own life led me to the happiness i needed and to this wonderful, well together, sexy, intelligent, caring, hard working man and gorgeous, sweet, mind blowing daughter. I'm sorry that some of you don't have that happy ending yet, but don't let other people live your life for you. Stay strong.

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Guest DG   
Guest DG

My cousin and I have been through hell and back trying to date with the idea of marriage. My cousin had almost the same life as you.

Were 8 years apart and I have a daughter. She called my cousin mom twice during a 'family' vacation my cousin and I arranged.

We are struggling and going crazy and glad that you are postin on this website. Thanks for the encouragement.

Would love to email or otherwise comect with other couples going through the same drama. We need help, we need prayers, and we need hope.

Association or contact with other couples going through the same thing would be a godsend and highly appreciated. :-)

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