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nessa76

Genetic Sexual Attraction?

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I've been reading a little in to this Genetic Sexual Attraction phenomenon and it says that cousins etc..... who have been denied growing up together are likely to become attracted to one another. Ones that have grown up together have a westermarck effect at puberty, were most would think yuck of having sex with a cousin.

I find it quite interesting because I feel like my attraction to my 1st cousin is this GSA  :smiley:

What does anyone else think about GSA and do you think it implies even sexual attraction to 2nd cousins?

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Even without genetics at play, cousins share so much in common that it would seem natural for them to hookup. GSA is probably a factor too. It shouldn't apply to 2nd cousins so much since they aren't genetically more similar than strangers. But they are probably very similar in social/economic terms which people look for in selecting a mate.

"Positive assortative mating " might describe second cousins better than GSA. Then again those terms may be synonymous lol. I would have to double check.

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I see what you mean, I do have other attractive male 1st cousins but i'm not attracted to any of them. I'm only attracted to one long distant cousin (1st) who I rarely see due to him living far away from where I live.

Chemistry can be a weird thing sometimes lol

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I forgot to add that the attraction I feel towards my cousin is so intense, its nothing like an attraction to a complete stranger in the streets, workplace or bar etc...

Its like an electrostatic feeling, that pulls me to want to be with him so badly. Oh well something might happen in the future, who knows lol

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That is quite interesting nessa76. I do kind of believe in that. My cousin and I are third cousins I think lol (his grandma and my grandma are sisters) I don't think this would apply to me and him but I know that the very first time we laid eyes on each other we were hooked. I didn't even know about him since last summer and now I am madly in love with him!! I know exactly how you feel.. I feel an attraction like that with my cousin as well and we live miles apart. I've never felt so close to anyone before and I don't think I ever will.

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I can't explain it either, but this question had been asked 1000 times here. Many insist that the attraction to their cousin eclipses all others. I think it is true. I've always thought of my cousin and I as opposite pole magnets.

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Hope8, you and your cousin are 2nd cousins not third.

your parent and his parent are 1st cousins.

So you two being one more generation away are 2nd.

Still doesn't make any difference in how you feel about him!!!

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Romalee,

Thank you for clearing that up for me lol. I wasn't sure if we were 2nd or 3rd cousins. I always thought we were 2nd cousins but my mom insisted that we were 3rd lol I knew she was wrong haha. & your right, it does not change my feelings for him at all!! I just wish we could be together.

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Is it possible to have such an intense attraction of chemistry for a cousin, even if he/she doesn't feel the same?

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I do believe it is possible... but normally when you feel that strong of a connection with someone they usually feel the same way. Does your cousin feel that way with you?

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I don't know because I haven't expressed my feelings to him yet and i'm hoping timing etc... gives me the opportunity to tell him how I feel.

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I don't know, I've never lived particularly close to any of my cousins and yet I am (or was) only attracted to one of them, and I don't think it had anything to do with being apart as kids.

Anyways, when this thing with my cousin happened a year ago I though I could never feel that kind of attraction for anyone, but recently I have, actually maybe even stronger. I have met someone and felt an instant connection to him, and the attraction was insane, and he felt the same about me, which made things escalate pretty quickly. Unfortunately, he also turned out t be a jerk and I am broken hearted again, even if it helped me get over my cousin.

Anyways, what I am trying to say is that I realized that, at least for me, I doubt the intensity of my feelings for my cousin had much to do with the fact that we were cousins. And I also think it's possible to feel the same kind of attraction toward someone else, someone not related to us. At the same time, unfortunately that does not mean they are the right person for us :(

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nessa76,

Does your cousin show you any signs that he might be interested in you? Does he flirt with you or even look at you in a way that a cousin shouldn't look at you? If he does do something like that then I think you should just throw in some little hints for him... flirt with him, ect.

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Well last time I saw him I had the winking from him but I haven't seen him for a few years, I do send him messages on facebook and at the beginning he did reply to my messages but lately I've not had a reply back from him and I try not to think/read too much in to it.

When his girlfriend had the baby, all I read on facebook was him calling her but I don't know why and I don't try and get involved. He never wanted a baby but he has, he's gorgeous  :smiley:

I'm thinking by him not replying back to me, he might be kind of hiding from me even though I have him in my friends network if you know what I mean.

He is also in the army, over in Afghanistan too so it might be that he's busy and not hiding from me, but I guess I will only know next time I see him and how he behaves towards me.

My gut tells me though at my granddads funeral the winks he gave me were flirtatious in nature, I can't see what else they would have been meant for lol

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According to our survey 78 percent believe the relationship with a cousin is "more intense" than others they have experienced. Interesting!

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It is interesting KC, its exactly how I feel and its without me even knowing about the 78% who feel the intensity also towards their cousin(s) :smiley:

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Winking usually has a flirtatious meaning... I mean I've never had anoter family member wink at me before lol. So I take that as flirting. You mentioned that he has a gf and a baby... my advice is not to even get involved with him. I know it's not what you want to hear but take it from someone whose been there. Trust me all it will do to you is hurt you because he will most likely not leave his gf and kid for you and then your left crying in the corner. If they for some reason split then you could try to pursue him but for now just keep the cousinship lol. & I know how you feel. I HATE when my cousin doesn't respond to me because then I wonder if he's changed his mind about me or something. Just hang in there for now and live your life. Hopefully you guys will meet up again and things will work out in your favor!

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Yeah,I totally believe in GSA too...it's been proven to me by myself at an early age!lol. I've been told it was wrong,disgusting,against God and all that and it was just looked down upon by those close to me I decided to tell,but that was when I was younger...I think people around me became more the wiser about me(although it's still looked down upon by some key people in my life). I've never actually been in a 'relationship' with a cousin but I've developed feelings/attractions towards them which people still don't understand as normal,even in this day and age.What's the westermark effect?

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According to our survey 78 percent believe the relationship with a cousin is "more intense" than others they have experienced. Interesting!

I found the survey and completed the applicable parts. The data generated is interesting.

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Wiki Westermarck Effect <----LINK

My Wife (Cousin) and I met once when I was 10 yrs old (and I couldn't stop looking at her...)

We met again 20 years later but were in relationships. We emailed briefly until her ex husband cut it off although It was innocent, we never expressed ANY feelings about each other.

10 years later (about 6 months ago) we met again. She invited me to visit a family reunion\party sorta thing and the rest is history.

We were both of military families that traveled everywhere and did not live within short proximity of each other.

I have other female cousins that I have never even considered anything about or with them. My wife on the other hand, is a feeling that I have never experienced with anyone.

We often joke about mannerisms that we both have...that are very much alike.

Yeah,I totally believe in GSA too...it's been proven to me by myself at an early age!lol. I've been told it was wrong,disgusting,against God and all that and it was just looked down upon by those close to me I decided to tell,but that was when I was younger...I think people around me became more the wiser about me(although it's still looked down upon by some key people in my life). I've never actually been in a 'relationship' with a cousin but I've developed feelings/attractions towards them which people still don't understand as normal,even in this day and age.What's the westermark effect?

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What causes the magnetic pull? I've just continued with this post, instead of making a brand new one btw

nessa76

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My husband and I are second cousins. We never knew the other one existed until we met online and started talking as adults. We immediately fell for each other. We like to joke and say it must have been GSA. But it is highly likely.

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My husband and I are second cousins. We never knew the other one existed until we met online and started talking as adults. We immediately fell for each other. We like to joke and say it must have been GSA. But it is highly likely.

Life is just so mysterious, how things happen and its just such a phenomenon that circumstances obviously can't be helped. I've always known that my cousin is my cousin it was only about 9 years ago that i became attracted to him at our grandads funeral, i'm not ashamed of it either just like i'm sure you both aren't either.

I've read too much with a lot that my cousin has put on facebook but sometimes i haven't and funnily enough what one of his friends had put so he must had confided to his friend about me but thats good because obviously he's been thinking about me lol Its nothing bad that they've put with only a few things either.

Its good that you both can joke about it too  :smiley:

nessa76

 

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Well we've been married for almost 2 months now and are expecting our first baby in feb, (my third) I have never felt so truly loved like he makes me feel. Plus, he always says, "if you can't laugh at yourself..." Lol!

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