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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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samapartofamy

why are you here on this site n wat hav u done to b wid ur cousin

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answer the question mentioned in the subject...

Ummm

juz asking what have the members done to be with their cousin lovers?

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i  will answer the question as soon as you write it in english.

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Why are we here on this site?

What steps have we taken to be with our cousins?

I am on this site because I wanted to inform myself on the subject of cousin marriage. The people here are helpful, knowledgeable, level-headed, and most of the leaders of the site are Christians which made me feel safe to open up.

I have done nothing to be with my cousin except keep in touch with him as a cousin. I highly doubt anything will ever come of it more than friends and I'm okay with that. It was probably just a general crush at the time. 

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Why am I here? Just broke up with my cousin. She dumped me for another guy (yeah she cheated on me!!). Read a few stories and I feel am not alone anymore since a lot of members here are on the same boat like me. Helping me a lot to move on.

What have I done to be with her? Well heaps! I've travelled to another country to be with her (twice). Stayed in the hotel, took her travelling, bought her stuffs, chatted everyday. In the end it only lasted 3.5 years and remember it's her who dumped me because she found another guy

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Why am I here?I was looking up 'cousin love' on the internet because all my life I was told that it was disgusting,looked down upon,not good,etc. Though I kept getting these crushes on my cousins and therewas one that just wasn't going away. So I was looking that up and I came across this site. There was a lot I wanted to say on here in relpy to posts and just to feel free to say 'I have a crush on my cousin' or 'I want to be with my cousin' and not face the looks of disgusts from my family members. I even did a 'research' paper on it for psychology...it's basically reasearch to guide my instructor to the neccessary websites. If I actually get with any of them remains to be seen...although there is this one I recently started talking to that I haven't met in person yet...but I love talking to him so.....I have no idea,lol.

What have I done to be with him?: Nothing...not because I didn't want too but because I couldn't. At the time I was able to run across this cousin of mine in person,I was 14,he was 26 and also had a girlfriend. Now he's 8 states away and I just can't get to him for a lot of reasons..:(..but life goes on I guess. It doesn't hurt knowing that he 'vanished' into thin air around the time my grandparents(his great aunt and uncle) passed away.I told him I was gonna need him because I didn't know how I was gonna handle it but after one time of texting me after it,I didn't hear from him. It made me see a lot so in a way,I'm thankful it happened. I was emotionally depending on him too much and I shouldn't have done that. Anyway,I know in the future that if anything happens with a cousin(I didn't meet all of them yet),I'll know where to turn to to feel safe in talking about it.  :wink:

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Why am i on this site? I am on this site simply to not feel alone. I don't really care what others think for no one will know except for my close friend and they except it. I simply wanted to know more into what i was doing, and it's nice to not feel like your the only on this earth or like a complete freak for loving the person i do. And it just amazes me to hear other peoples stories, I LOVE IT! :)

What have i don to be with my cousin? I haven't made many sacrifices for my cousin. I sacrificed me being accepted by my family anymore for what i was doing with him. Uhm, i got kicked out for 5 months after my parents found out. I guess really thats about it.

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I am on the site to help people and be part of the community. It took me long enough, I have occasionally browsed the site randomly across the years but I wasn't in the right place in my life to join in. I was meaning to join for quite a some time now but never got around to it, then I finally did because I felt I might be able to help someone.

To be with my cousin I was just myself and it happened naturally. I'm 28 and she's 26. We've known each other our whole lives and always lived close. What I remember as children were mutual affections and playing silly games. I was 2 whole years older than her so I wanted to take care of her. She would sit on my lap, we would cuddle on the bed and lay in each others arms to watch a movie with our other cousins. I have a memory of touching tongues from when we were about 4,5,6 years old. This was all in front of other cousins and family, it was just accepted like it was the norm, nobody ever said anything, except I remember times when she was sitting on my lap and my nan would say aww, they love each other and we would just giggle a little and carry on chatting. There was us and then there was the rest of the world. The rest of the world just went by around us. At this point I didn't think anything of it. She was my cousin. But as we got a bit older the attraction was becoming noticeable by wanting to spend all our time with each other and show each other all the attention, just an aura or feeling when around her, and wooing each other with kindness favors and compliments. Then came kissing for the first time and soon after it mutual declarations of I love you. She said it first and it took me by surprise, but I immediately said I love her too. By this time I was 14 she was 12.

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What have I done to be with my cousin? I have ordered my life around having a long distance relationship with this man.  Daily phone calls and text messages and planning visits once or twice a month. Four months in and we have plans for the future - plans that involve us being in the same city together within the next 2 years.  Whether or not we "make it" is yet to be seen, but I have a feeling that this relationship is THE ONE; after way to many years of not being together neither one of us will let this go without giving it all we got.

Why am I on this site?  I am here because I needed support for embarking on a romantic relationship with my 1st cousin.  The advice and direction I have received has been invaluable. 

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First, I believe you would have a better response if you asked you question in actual English...you're not texting!

Anyways, I found this site and its comforting to know that I am not the only one that has had or is currently in a relationship with a cousin.  Its not like this is something that I can openly talk to anyone about.  My cousin and I have kept it "our secret" for a very long time.  Nice to know I'm not the only one out there, that's all.

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I am on here basically for help with my attraction towards my cousin. I'm glad i'm not the only one out there, since there seems to be a lot  :laugh:

I've not done anything with him, as of yet but i did send him a naughty/rude message (drunken) on facebook which was pretty bad of me. Especially considering i have family in my network too  :embarrassed: lol

nessa76

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So...did your cousin ever reply to your message you left on facebook?  ...and did anyone else (from the family) have anything to say about what you posted?  My cousin and I have been "involved" - but it has been our secret!  I know I would die if anyone in our family found out!!

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So...did your cousin ever reply to your message you left on facebook?  ...and did anyone else (from the family) have anything to say about what you posted?  My cousin and I have been "involved" - but it has been our secret!  I know I would die if anyone in our family found out!!

My cousin posted videos after replying me back about a party of mine that he couldn't attend. I think he was embarrasssed about the whole thing more than anything.  Family never got to read what i put thank god, all heaven would let loose if they did i'd imagine  :laugh:

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I'm on here because my first cousin and I are totally and completely in love and didn't know how to tell our friends and family at first. This site provided us with the support that we needed to come 'out of the closet', so to say. I'm 26 and we've been hiding our attraction to one another since I was 18 and we really got to spend time together for the first time (he grew up across the country from me).

Oh boy, what haven't I done to be with him? Once him and I couldn't hold back our feelings anymore I left my husband and home and moved away with my cousin to a cabin in the woods totally off the grid. I went from a big, nice house to a one room cabin with an outhouse to be with him! We've been ostracized from some of our family and friends but the ones that really matter are understanding and accepting. We started our lives over together in a new place where no one knows we're cousins (although we're proud of one another and do freely explain that we are cousins now that the shock value has warn off). I've taken on the role of step mom for his 3 beautiful children and they adore having me in their lives as more than just a cousin from afar. We've totally built new a life together and we're also in the process of building a home together... literally building it board by board together because he is an awesome carpenter.

We're all entitled to love and we cant command our hearts to love someone we don't. I learned that the hard way through a messy divorce when I should have not denied my heart and been with my cousin all along!

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I'm here to find support, information and hopefully some kind of connection with folks who actually understand what I am going through, at least much better than the average person.

I haven't done anything to be with him because I'm keeping this secret to myself. I'm so afraid that he would be weirded out. I am not sure how he would react so I'd rather suffer in silence and not lose him.

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I'm here because the stories of relationships that worked out make me feel warm and fuzzy. My own potential relationship with my cousin never got off the ground due to a number of factors. Distance and the knowledge that family was not going to be supportive were the biggest obstacles. Anyone with eyes could tell that I was completely smitten by him, but I wasn't brave enough to broach the subject with him until it was way too late to do anything about it. I was married with 3 kids by then, but thought that getting the answers I wanted might bring me closure. Instead, the knowledge that he had, in fact, been quite tempted to reciprocate the feelings he knew I had for him back in the day actually made my longing worse, even though we had both agreed that there was no possible justification for picking things back up again at that point.

I know I posted a longer version of this story on another thread, but have had no responses. Which is understandable, I guess, as it's a bit of a non-story...but my feelings for him remain so strong even after 35 years and seeing each other only very, very seldom that once in a while I just need to vent in a place where it will be understood.

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Surprised to find such a site dealing with such an emotional subject.>>..After decades and marriages that she & I have had, to see that our feelings of love & care for each other, have not disappeared.

.........I was 21 and she was 16, when we got close, when she came to visit when I was post-hospital from being severely wounded in Viet Nam..........She had to return home, and we saw each other once or twice there-after as we both launched onto our own directions in life.  She never left my mind & heart thru the years, but the stigma of even becoming cousin-close always was the self-defeating second thought in my mind when the fond thoughts of her surfaced in my mind.  (we did communicate by letters while we were in two different places in Germany, years later, but ended the commo)

........I am 65 and she is 60 now, we're both married, and 1000 miles apart......In January, thru FB, we have begun to talk...........At this late time in our lives, we are in our own particular positions, and can not make the changes that would free us, in order to be together.  Her husband physically needs her, being disabled,  and it is practically the same with respect to my wife, although slighly different.

........Our marriages to others thru the years have brought disappointments & let-downs.  When my lovely cousin & I talk,  I can't help but think if similar let-downs & disappointments might have taken place in our lives together.    Possibly;  But we probably will not ever get the chance to find out.  I have had an old love for her, it was always there, but glossed over by the events in my life. 

.........You young folks who have discovered a mutual love together with your cousin, pay attention to the song in your heart, explore it, before you go off get involved in other directions, & years later, regretingly  look back.

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This site has everything you need regarding advice on cousin relationships and much more. No topic is not discussed here, and how reassuring is that?

For my love I moved cities with my children, (admittedly, his city is much nicer) travelled

soooo many miles by car and bus to maintain our ldr, as did he. Racked up

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I was actually hoping she was also a member, about 99% sure she is not and I will probably just end up jumping off a bridge when I hear she is pregnant. #LittleHopeLeft, #DreamsDie

I have pm her on facebook for her phone number, and another time saying I missed her. No responses.

:(

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I was actually hoping she was also a member, about 99% sure she is not and I will probably just end up jumping off a bridge when I hear she is pregnant. #LittleHopeLeft, #DreamsDie

I have pm her on facebook for her phone number, and another time saying I missed her. No responses.

:(

I wouldn't jump of a bridge, your worth more than that :smiley:

It happens a lot, that cousin relationships aren't mutual. It's just how it is, basically it's life!

nessa76

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I know the feeling all too well. I am here because I am love with my second cousin. Please don't do anything that would hurt alot of people that love you. I know ots hard to be ignored by someone you care so much about but you have to keep going because as long as there is another day there is hope.

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