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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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Guest Tom

Wife and her cousin

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I think my wife and her cousin have messed around in the past, but lie about.  What kind of clues would help me know?

It is not that she did something with her cousin, it is the lie that bothers me.

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let it go. especially if this is something you suspect happened before you married her. her life before you really is not any of your business, and it's quite likely that she feels embarrassed about it, if it even happened. she may feel that you'd judge her, criticize her, or expect you to avoid social situations that include her cousin. 

why do you feel the need to know, anyway?

surely there are things in YOUR past that you'd rather SHE not know about.

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Tom, if you're upset and worried she's not telling the truth,  wouldn't it be best to ask her for yourself?

Let her know you aren't judging,  but that it bothers you that she won't tell you what's up.

Is it just that you want to know if she messed around with her cousin,  or are you worried she is cheating?

My two cents is, if you think there is/was something funky going on between her and her cousin, you might be right.  Since coming to this site, I've come to see that more people have fooled around with their cousins than I previously thought.

Take care.

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