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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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Blink64

Does she want me or not?

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So i have this cousin that keeps giving me signals that she may want me.  She does things like stand real close to me to where her shoulder is touching mine when are at family parties, sometimes when she's cutting my hair she'll get like real excited to the point where it feels like she's lusting for me, when she's with her friends or guy friends she'll act normally but when i'm at her job she'll act a little nervously be overly nice and stand so close to the chair where she's cutting my hair that she pressing on my arms(when their on the arm rests) real hard, one time she landed her vagina near my hand when she was cutting my hair i was able to feel it and it was super hot....then all of sudden she stopped doing all these things and just cuts me normally, she doesn't get overly excited, she doesn't get real close to me at the chair no more or act nervous. Sometimes she'll get real close to me or get some what nervous, but not like how it use to be.

so then i think she lost interest...but then recently when i text her that i want her to cut my hair on said day she calls me instead of waiting for me to to just arrive there like normally, at first i just thought she do  it cause got busy and wanted me to get their fast...but then the next time she calls i say "wuzzup" she tries to start a convo with me like "Hi, what are you doing?" i say "nothin" and tells me to come in but it felt like she didn't want to get of the phone and her voice kinda turned seductive like "how long you gonna take?" right before then convo ended....so then i think she's sending me a signal that she wants to talk more, so i send text messages but she never replies to any of them.

it's as if she only acts this way when i'm going to go see her. when i'm not going to see her, i'm just her cousin. idk what does she want? if she only see's me as just a quick fuck then im fine with that, but why does she make it confusing?

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Blink64,

It probably depends. Is she normally a flirtatious type, or, did it just seem to be with you? She may have just become frustrated at your lack of response to her advances. In my experience, a girl will only try so long. Why does she make it confusing? How old are you son? How many women have you met? They ALL tend to be confusing. Have you seen the FB post on "The Figuring out Women book being in stock now", and it reaches from the floor so high you need a step ladder to open it? Well, that about sums it up.

LOL, I see by the first part of your last sentence that the cuss filter got you, and, by that sentence, I assume you are at least somewhat attracted to her. At least enough for a roll in the hay. My only caution would be, that if you do, these things are want to get quite intense, very quickly. I would recommend you call her bluff if she starts flirting again, or, being physically forward. If she rubs her "womanly bits" (to keep it PG 13,  :evil:) against you at the next haircut, lean in a little. Find out just how bold she is. I'll assume this is at a beauty shop, and I doubt I need tell you how tongues wag there. If she doesn't back down, and in fact ramps it up, along with the tip, you should tell her openly "You know, we should go out to dinner some time, and do a little catching up."

As far as the not replying to texts thing, I guess it's pretty common. Mine doesn't either. But, mine, as a rule, hates the telephone anyhow. She isn't one who keeps it in her hand constantly, so, if I text, and she doesn't see or hear it, then someone else does, and then another and another, she will respond to whichever one she does see, and doesn't really check to see how many she may have missed. That could at least be part of it. And, she may also be seeing how persistent you are as well, who knows.

I say ramp it up with her to find out if SHE blinks..... :wink:

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[quote author=H

LOL, I see by the first part of your last sentence that the cuss filter got you, and, by that sentence, I assume you are at least somewhat attracted to her. At least enough for a roll in the hay. My only caution would be, that if you do, these things are want to get quite intense, very quickly. I would recommend you call her bluff if she starts flirting again, or, being physically forward. If she rubs her "womanly bits" (to keep it PG 13,  :evil:) against you at the next haircut, lean in a little. Find out just how bold she is. I'll assume this is at a beauty shop, and I doubt I need tell you how tongues wag there. If she doesn't back down, and in fact ramps it up, along with the tip, you should tell her openly "You know, we should go out to dinner some time, and do a little catching up."

As far as the not replying to texts thing, I guess it's pretty common. Mine doesn't either. But, mine, as a rule, hates the telephone anyhow. She isn't one who keeps it in her hand constantly, so, if I text, and she doesn't see or hear it, then someone else does, and then another and another, she will respond to whichever one she does see, and doesn't really check to see how many she may have missed. That could at least be part of it. And, she may also be seeing how persistent you are as well, who knows.

I say ramp it up with her to find out if SHE blinks..... :wink: 

Hey thanks man u pretty much layed it down for me. U seem more experienced, how u ramp it up if u were there? At first I didn't see her like that at all but then I started notice and noticed how hot she was, now I do wana act on it...is it to late?

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Blink64, 

I have no idea if it's too late or not. That's what you're going to have to try to find out.

You say she "presses" against you, at least once with her more delicate parts, shall we say. Well, if she's so enthusiastic to have you come in for a haircut the next time you call, be enthusiastic to be there when you get there, and see if she starts rubbing around on you again. If she does, and it's even accidental, press back, and very subtly rub her leg with your forearm. Not so it is visibly noticeable to others, but to where she will know it wasn't an accident on your part. All the while, looking her in the eyes in the mirror. If you do that, and she notices, she WILL look at you in the mirror, to gauge what you're up to. Just smile shyly. She will either continue, or stop. If she continues, you do too. If she stops, then perhaps she has exhausted her interest. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. If she does continue, or even step it up, there could be other things going through her mind too. It could be that she is just getting a rush out of the taboo nature of overtly (and publicly) being physical with you, whether there are underlying feelings on her part or not. She may have been doing it for the adrenalin of it. If that's the case, and either on purpose or accidentally, she does it again, and you respond, if she gets a rush from it, she will continue to play the game. Each time she touches you, alternate between lightly pressing back, and pressing with more force. She will think you are into it as much as she is, but not being pushy about it, just playful.

Then again, one of these times she is wanting to keep you on the phone, and being a little seductive, you could always use the old tried and true "If you weren't my cousin" line to see how she responds. Like, "You know, you sound so good on the phone, that if you weren't my cousin, I'd be over there in 2 minutes flat." See how that goes over. If her reaction is positive, or even a giggly neutral, you could always escalate and say "To tell you the truth, I really don't care that much that we are cousins, I'm on my way."  :grin: Take it from there. You don't have to be a pick-up artist or get a pick-up line book, you just have to pay attention to the opportunities to flirt when they come about, and respond accordingly.

I've NEVER been a "pick-up line" kind of guy. The best one I ever used, I never said a word. About a year ago, when the ex and I had split, this gal I knew was single was getting visibly annoyed at this clown blabbing in her ear. From where they were, he couldn't see me, but she was looking right at me. I grinned, and rolled my eyes, and she did too. I then twisted my wrist, like twisting the throttle on the Harley, and tilted my head toward the door. She looked at me funny, so I did it again. She got it then, grinned real big, and quickly tilted her head toward the door. She excused herself, we both got up, went to the door, and rode till 4:30am. It's all about timing, recognizing the opportunity, sometimes MAKING the opportunity, and then casually going with the flow. 

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Haha thx  you're great man. To answer your first question, I don't know her that well to know if she's just a flirt. However she never use to treat me like that ever. I only ever saw her as just my cousin who had a bit of a bitchy attitude, we always kept to our respective spaces. I most hanged with her younger sisters, so I always thought she saw me as her younger cousin. But then when I went yo her job to get a cut she began acting way differently with me then she usually does. Ur more experienced wat u think happened ? Did her freak come out or wat? Lpl

Not sure if that helps u, but thats how it usually was between me and her.

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