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      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

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SgMustard

Should I tell her?

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When we were little kids my second cousin and I only saw each other on holidays, but when my parents got divorced and my dad moved in with my uncle (her grandfather) we started seeing a lot more of each other. I was 13 and she was 11. Family was always in and out of my uncle's house and all my other cousins were older than us so we only ever had each other to hang out with. I don't know when it started but I developed feelings for her and never told her even though I told get everything else. I was too afraid of what she'd think. When I told her I'd had my first kiss she started crying and I almost told her but I couldn't. The summer I moved in with my dad at my uncle's house, she was the only friend I had. I'd go over to her house and spend the night most of the time and she'd cuddle against me while she was asleep until I almost fell out of the bed. I still never told her how I felt. The worst happened about a year and a half ago, when I was 17 and she was 15. We helped set up an Easter service my aunt was performing at. Afterwords we spent the day together, but when I left she'd said I left her all alone. So for almost two months I would send her a goodmorning text every day and then we'd say how lucky we were to have each other. She asked me one day who I was in love with after making some offhand remark about it. I didn't know if she felt the same way, I thought so but if I was wrong I was afraid she'd hate me. So I lied. And have been lying ever since. She has a boyfriend now, pretty serious, but I can't stop thinking of her and that maybe she loves me the same way.

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Yes marriages between second cousins are legal i know but the problem is more with family and I'm not sure if she feels the same way

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you are an adult now. it's time to stop worrying about what the family thinks regarding your love life. BUT.... she's still a minor living in her parents' home... so you'd probably be wise to wait til she's able to move out on her own and make her own decisions.

and as for her serious boyfriend? she's young. she may be serious about him this month, but chances are they won't last long term.

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