• Announcements

    • KC

      Get Smart on the Web   09/16/2016

      Be informed on better ways to stay safe on the web -- Source: Mozilla
raptor6

new here and six months relationship with my first cousin.

This topic has had no activity within the past six months. It is recommended that you start a new topic instead of replying to old topics.

5 posts in this topic

Hello,I'm new here and I been six months involved with my first cousin, our lives have developed much the same, both divorced on our forties, and everything is so good, I have never found someone so alike me, at the beginning I felt awkward flirting with her, she is a very educated and intelligent person already working on her PhD. and I am somewhat a very bright and self taught person besides my military career, since we made contact we click, we fell in love and like its being said in this website, love grows among people of the same kind, has been wonderful than ever, its a relationship based on mutual respect, comprehension and listening to each other, however sometimes it assault us the reality that we are cousins, to the point where she considers leaving me and thus ending this relationship, a minute later, she changes her mind and everything is back to normal, but we are so alike its like, we know what the other wants, I have never dated anyone like this, our mothers are sisters, and the education is the same, its like she is my twin soul, I even moved to her city to be closed to her and got a job down there, everything seems to be perfect, however there is a problem, and that is that we are always hiding from the other family members, we live in Mexico city, its a huge place, but we are always on the look out and sometimes, I know she wishes she could tell everyone that the man of her life its her cousin, I know if our mothers find out this will be over, its difficult, and this reflects on the fact, that our love is forbidden and almost impossible, due to the strict uprising we grew up on, I would love some advice on what to do and how to ease her down, we both have done our research and we both have a very broad mind and education, we know both legal and theologically its acceptable our relationship, however our families are very strict and we fear very harsh repercussions if they ever find out, give us some advice or at least cheer us up, we need it. R&G.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

has she been to this site yet?

why do you say that if your moms found out, this would be over. you're both ADULTS! you're in your 40s! you are not teenagers whose mothers can forbid you to date!

there is NOTHING forbidden about your relationship, except perhaps in the minds of your moms. and even with that, you're making an assumption. has the subject of cousin romance ever specifically been discussed by your mothers within your earshot?

what POSSIBLE repercussions could you be worried about? you say they'd be very harsh. again, you aren't children! what are they going to do, whip you with a sapling branch?

listen. IF your mothers object to you two being together, this is what you do. you sit them down and educate them on the facts... you give them a rebuttal for every objection. if they worry about legal stuff, you ease their fears. if they think it's immoral, you show them in scripture where it isn't. if they are afraid you'll have a child with three heads, you assure them that's a myth. at your ages you probably have no desire to start having kids anyway.

and if none of that works and the moms still won't accept you, then you tell your moms that you are very sorry, but you are adults and have chosen a life of happiness. trust me on this. the odds that your moms will risk losing their children over who their child loves is nearly non-existent. it may take a little time, but they will not risk losing you. don't let your fear of losing THEM override your common sense. parents don't cut their children out of their lives. they occasionally threaten to, but only until they see if it's going to work.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks for your words, I showed her the reply and we are giving it some thought about coming out with our relationship, probably we will do it somewhere when we reach our anniversary, this site is a great help for people like us, this is the greatest thing that ever happened to me and to her too, I wish it had happened before, However your reply has been a great cheer up, since we live in Mexico its a little strange for some people down here, but our classmates at the university have been very supportive, Thank you for your support, R&G.

 

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

oh trust me, it's "strange" for people here in the US, too. and in most places, unless you're in the middle east where cousin marriage is common. i don't know why there is such a social stigma that hangs over cousin marriage in so many countries. a lot of misinformation out there i guess. you're fortunate, though... here in america the laws vary by state. at least you don't have that to contend with there!

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

oh trust me, it's "strange" for people here in the US, too. and in most places, unless you're in the middle east where cousin marriage is common. i don't know why there is such a social stigma that hangs over cousin marriage in so many countries. a lot of misinformation out there i guess. you're fortunate, though... here in america the laws vary by state. at least you don't have that to contend with there!

Yes, exactly.

Don't let your or her mother end things. You're adults, end of! I hate, hate, HATE the absolute ignorance out there surrounding cousin relationships. Don't let your relationship fall prey to it.

0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your content will need to be approved by a moderator

Guest
You are commenting as a guest. If you have an account, please sign in.
Reply to this topic...

×   You have pasted content with formatting.   Remove formatting

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor