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How does your cousin make you feel

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Hi, im 18 years old and my cousin is 22. Im a female. My cousin and i spent a lot of time together as kids (including my 9 other cousins), i moved away when i was about 8 years old. I moved back when i was about 15, a lot of things changed after i moved away, but they changed in a good way. It took me a while to get used to having all my cousins around me again. But what i do remember vividly was how close i became with my cousin, we spent a lot of time together doing stupid stuff, like when we were kids. He introduced me to a lot of things....things that i love to do now. We spent hours watching anime, playing N64, playing sports and other things. Sadly last year something horrible happened between us, something that the family (aunts, uncles, grandparents, younger cousins from15-down could not know about) He didn't speak to us for a year, not having him by my side honestly destroyed me. This past christmas, my cousins had a get together and we all got drunk. I don't remember what happened specifically but what i do remember is running towards him and telling him how much he meant to me. He said: "me too" but they way he said it didnt sound sincere, which broke my heart. We grew up so close, and all of the sudden we just grew apart.

I ran to the bathroom and started crying, im not sure if i cried because i was happy that he hugged me back or just because i missed him and the fact that i havent spent any time with him after the incident. A few days later he asked me if we could talk, i got a little nervous because I didn't know what he wanted talk about. We spent about 2 hours talking in his car, but it was honestly worth it. At the end of the conversation he confessed to me that he's had a crush on me for the longest time, how we had so much in common that it was weird to think about how much of the same stuff we liked. I do remember him telling me that "you can't choose who you love"

I smiled and told him how i felt the same way for all of these years, how at one point i thought to myself "if he wasn't my cousin, he could be the man of my dreams" I truly love him, but we feel like our family wont agree that we are secretly dating.

Two days ago, we went out to eat and we spoke about our situation, we needed to put an end to it. He said that we needed to take a break, and i felt like we were breaking up and i was so upset. As soon as we got into his car he said "what ever i just said, FUCK that! I want you"

I blushed so hard and we kissed.

I love him so much, as my bf and my cousin. And i couldnt change anything❤️

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That story sounds so much like our story it makes my heart smile :)

If you are willing to fight for each other, you'll make it. But the two of you need to sit down & talk about things like what both of you are looking for, how/if you are going to tell your family, how are you going to take on their reactions.

If it's any help...

We have been together for 15yrs & I STILL love him more than I could ever imagine loving someone. My cousin is everything I've ever wanted in a partner & several I couldn't have thought to ask for.

And even though it took them a while to come around, my parents love him for the way he treats me. They also know that I am hard headed & never asked them for their permission to love him.

No one in our neighborhood even knows we are cousins, why should they? We are regular people just like everyone else. :)

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I would Give anything to have my cousin feel the same for me :/ you guys are blessed .

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it can be really emotionally confusing in the early stages of a relationship with a cousin. all those fears, all that social stigma and taboo. i remember those days! 

and now, 17 years later, we're still together. still happy. nobody cares that we're related. he makes me laugh every day of my life.

of course that is the rosy outlook, the happy ending, but marriage is hard work. and just because you're cousins doesn't mean you'll have it easy, and i don't want to give you a false impression that you will. if you want to grow old together, you're both going to have to be totally committed to sticking it out even when you think you hate each other. or when you want to hate each other. because you will have times like that.

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Agreed with LadyC, a relationship/marriage is give and take and a compromise. It's about the vows you make, through sickness and in health meaning standing by each other through thick and thin :smiley:

It's no different for cousincouples than any other relationship but maybe a little more energy to put in a relationship with a cousin because of social and taboo issues which is to be overcome.

nessa76

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My first cousin and I got married this past October. We are going through the life of your topical newlyweds. However it seems like every time there is a an disagreement . With someone from our family they are fast to throw in our face that fact we are married and cousins. Yet any other time they seem to be supportive. This is so confusing and frustrating. My husband and I both love our family and desire to be close. However lately we have been wanting to pull away. We are Christians and are aware of the division he devil likes to create..... is there any others who are or have experienced this? My.cousin -husband makes me feel that sometimes we may not make it.due.to the issues at hand

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Candace,

We are not married and not yet open to our family.

In my years of experience, I've learned that some people, on the outside of the relationship, act like they know everything and sometimes latch onto something personal or hurtful, to justify their position. Their behavior is something which they will have to atone for...for it is the devil which they have taken into their mouth.

You've done nothing wrong in having your relationship and so, there is no shame to be had.  Your marriage is a covenant with God and must be your primary focus, next to Him.  Pray for the Lord be in your relationship...pray together.  Openly communicate your feelings with each other...and, remember to give each other space.

Best wishes

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How do I tell my cousin Chea I like her? What's bad is that we are really close! Please help and answer my question.

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