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luna

should I have sex with my cousin?

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I have more info in my two other previous posts.

im 20 he's 19.

we are both sexually attracted to each other and talk about having sex.

we've kissed and done other things, like oral...etc...

should we take the next  step?

I don't want it to get awkward after.

he would be my first time.

I love him and he says he loves me too..

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luna, i've come to the conclusion that you just don't listen well. you don't want sound advice, you want a green light.

so go right ahead and have sex with him. and then think of the three replies i've given you on different threads you've posted about the same thing as you're counting the pieces of your shattered heart and dreams.

now i'll step aside and let others counsel you if they wish. i'm done trying to help you.

and as for those of you who would respond to her, i hope you'll read her other threads about this guy first.

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You are not going to get a green light from me either.  He "says" he loves you but he keeps on breaking up with you.  That isn't love, it is doing and saying anything to get what he wants.

Wake up and see the reality here.

Nat

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:o

worst part is all of our family suspects and they're already against us and not speaking to us :X

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did you even READ what was written in response to your other posts?

maybe your family is opposed to this because he's a jerk and don't want to see you destroyed. because once he breaks your heart, it's no just a "you and he" thing anymore, it affects the entire extended family. people take sides. your side and his side. there are two sides to the family that don't need to be at war with each other.

he's 19. you've said that he has been a womanizer since before you two got together.... which was at 16. you've said that this is a long distance relationship, and that there are plenty of rumors going around that while you two are in different cities, he's out playing the field.

why the heck do you think he loves YOU? no offense, but you're probably one of many, many girls that believe he loves them. he doesn't know what love is.

now if you really want advice from us, you need to start listening instead of creating new threads in hopes that you'll get a different answer.

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and believe it or not, my harshness is because i give a damn, and i think you're worth more than you're giving yourself credit for. i'm trying to protect you from your own impulses.

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luna, 

You asked if you should have sex with your cousin. No. At least not yet. If you have to ask, the answer is not obvious enough, or you wouldn't have to ask. So, for now, cool the jets, and get to a much better friendship. I'm not going to tell you no physical, because you two are technically adults, and you've already crossed that line. But before you get any further carried away, you really should get more connected, and be very sure you are ready to face the drama. Sorry, but y'all ain't there yet. Work on that.

And awkward? Let me tell you about awkward. Let me tell you about 30 years of awkward. And that between favorite/best cousins. For life. That never changed, we just avoided each other for decades, and yes, it was damned awkward. We were your age, 20, (we're almost exactly the same age, one week to the day apart) and still were not mature enough to deal with the very intense physical response or even more intense emotional response our neeked shenanigans wrought. We're over 50 now, and it's only been in the last 3 years or so that we've been able to air it all out and let go of the awkward of it. But, since our "moment" then, and to this day, and going forward, we're committed to others, and there will be no repeat performance out of us. 

My suggestion is to take a couple more years. Talk out exactly what you each want and expect out of whatever this relationship is going to be. Get on the same page, to be prepared for the drama you already know is coming out of family, and only then, if all these things are in place, go for it.

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No. Not because he's your cousin but because he sounds like a [bleep].

But with that said, you probably won't listen. So, if you must keep messing around with this guy & you take NO OTHER advice from us at least take this - use protection.

Because one day you won't be 20 & in love with someone who's 'in love' with every woman he meets. When that day comes you won't want to have regrets over what you've done in this moment of your life. Herpes & babies are forever.

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